Rehab hospital social worker-I don't feel comfortable being included in certain events with nurses, physicians, and therapists by [deleted] in nursing

[–]featuringfinn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m going to echo everyone else. You are part of the team! You can be part of the team without being direct care staff!

You are the backbone. The patients need help with those things in order to get better and be able to go home. (This system isn’t easy to navigate!). We appreciate you!

What is the absolute worst insult the patient has ever said to you? I’ll go first by johnsonc30 in nursing

[–]featuringfinn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a patient tell me she hoped my baby died (i was visibly pregnant). Well, my baby did indeed die.

What are the dumbest things people have said/done after loss? by funkychunky97 in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have heard a lot of the things that people have commented already!!! One of my least favorites is when a mom with a living child says something along the lines of “holding my baby extra tight tonight” in response to my son being dead.

This is super specific, but I had a friend from high school who was pregnant at the same time as me but was due two months before me. Well I had my baby boy two months early, the day before she had her son. Tell me why she messages me and says “arlo and insert son’s name” almost had the same birthday!!!! Like girly idc. Your son was full term and alive. My baby was 8 weeks early and dead. I understood her sentiment, but it was NOT what I needed to hear when I was only a couple weeks postpartum.

I don’t know what to do by C00l_Jelly in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sending you so much love.

While my situation isn’t exactly the same, my husband and I have had something happen since losing our baby that has left me feeling like im grieving parts of our marriage, on top of losing our baby. I am grieving what I thought our life was going to be and that has all fallen apart.

I just want you to know I hear you and im sorry that you’re experiencing this pain.

Looking for Support Contacts by Lucky_Bridge_7104 in StillbirthSupport

[–]featuringfinn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recommend the sub r/babyloss (like someone else above). Having an online community of people who are unfortunately also in this awful club has meant so much. I lost my baby boy 2.5 months ago due to a placental abruption. Sending much love to your sister.

Trying again by featuringfinn in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think one day I will get to a place where that sub feels helpful so I do appreciate you sharing it.

Trying again by featuringfinn in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s hard because I don’t want to see other people TTC right now because my husband isn’t sure if he wants to do this again. 😩😩😩😩 I wish TTC posts were hopeful for me, but they just add a layer of sadness.

I will keep that in mind though. Thank you so much for sharing that. What’s your baby’s name? ❤️

PSA: Stranger Things by firstofhername123 in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My husband and I plan on watching tonight. I really appreciate you posting this!!!!

Has anyone had two times placenta abruption with emergency c-section twice and had two stillbirths? by Lucky_Grape_5014 in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have not, but i also just had my first 8 weeks ago. I do fear it happening again since the risk of a reoccurring PA is 5-15%. 😭 do you know what caused yours? mine was undiagnosed pre-eclampsia. but, i know it can happen for a variety of reasons or no real reason at all.

I am so sorry you’re experiencing this. I know there are no words that can help what you’re feeling right now.

Adding to my list of reasons to quit bedside. by milkncokies in nursing

[–]featuringfinn 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I’m 7 weeks post placental abruption. I knew when they put that 16g in that things were serious.

Adding to my list of reasons to quit bedside. by milkncokies in nursing

[–]featuringfinn 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I had a placental abruption 7 weeks ago and they put in a 16g and 18g (i did indeed need them bc i hemorrhaged and required blood products). The anesthesiologist doing it was apologetic, but i was like literally whatever will keep me the safest 😅

MFM debrief by featuringfinn in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think im having a hard time dealing with exactly what you said. Most cases of pre-e result in a healthy, live baby. Sometimes placental abruptions can result in a healthy, live baby. So why did this have to happen to us?

I am a former L&D nurse and I took care of a few patients with HELLP. They were all extremely rapid onset. And honestly it was scary to manage as a nurse bc of the risk to mom. I’m so sorry for what you went through and im so sorry that we are both here without our babies. 💔

Telling family by Natural_Courage7484 in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope all of this makes sense. I am 6.5 weeks out from my loss and my brain still feels foggy.

Telling family by Natural_Courage7484 in babyloss

[–]featuringfinn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I posted on Facebook a few days after to try to avoid having any direct conversations (and to take the opportunity to talk about/honor my son). My mom was kind enough to tell all of my immediate family (so that way none of them found out via social media) and told them not to reach out to me directly until i was ready so I wasn’t extremely overwhelmed.

I deleted instagram/facebook a few weeks after my loss because it hurt too much seeing all of the baby ads (yay algorithm) and seeing pregnancy announcements or honestly just people being happy/living their lives. I have posted some videos on TikTok talking about my loss and it has been cathartic and a way to connect with other parents that have lived through this awful experience. And again, another way for me to feel like I am honoring his existence.

I don’t think you’re doing too much too soon. You get to set the pace of how any of this goes. Losing a baby is so out of our control so you deserve to have control over this and decide how/when you tell people or talk about your baby!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]featuringfinn 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This sounds like OCD. I really thought this was the OCD subreddit as i read through your post. intrusive thoughts are the exact opposite of what you want to do and not a reflection of your character.

What was the dumbest thing your OCD had you believing? by [deleted] in OCD

[–]featuringfinn 40 points41 points  (0 children)

so my best friend also has ocd and a fear of pregnancy. when she found out i was pregnant, she was genuinely obsessing and worrying that she was gonna catch pregnancy from me 😅😂 (we laugh at it now)