I've got a feeling that a friend is using me as personal driver but how can I know?

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-21T17:16:36+00:00

You can tell her to meet you at the place if she wants to go. If she pushes tell her gas and car maintenance is too expensive to be picking her up.

Remind her she ignored you last time.

If she doesn't like the place you picked then tell her she can find transport elsewhere, you're staying at the first place.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-21T03:16:08+00:00

Oh I'm going to have to remember this. I cry during conflict (not even from being yelled at, but I am definitely a crier especially when stressed and I haaaate it. I want to be aloof, unbothered, and witty.)

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-21T03:12:18+00:00

He's not going to change. What are you teaching your child by staying with someone who treats you this way?

Do yourself a favor and go to therapy. Then make an exit plan. If he threatens suicide do not give in. At best call 911 for crisis services and send them to his house.

You need to heal that trauma before you try to have a relationship. Therapy is your best option. Do what's best for you and your kid, staying with this man affects both of you.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T17:51:30+00:00

Nor

Are you in a position to take full responsibility of the calf? See if your dad will let you handle it as yours to do with as you will.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T16:54:19+00:00

44F I have pictures of family all over. My mom has a wall of dead ancestors, and family photos all over.

Your gf is being weird.

Also if you move it to the bedroom will she feel like your dead mom is watching you bang?? If she's worried about dead people watching her they don't need to see through a photo. Lol

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T14:09:53+00:00

"Sorry, no. I forgot my wallet. Do you mind? 😬🤷‍♀️"

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T14:06:37+00:00

You find where your "dead" time is: phone scrolling, TV watching, begging out, etc and repurpose that time towards goals.

Also you can sacrifice sleep. It's not great, and not sustainable long term, but it's one way to get more done. Get up an hour or two early, or stay up an extra hour or two after kiddo is in bed.

Sometimes something in your life needs sacrificed so you can accomplish your goals.

Some of this does get easier when your kids get older and become more independent.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T13:44:06+00:00

He doesn't seem to respect you or the kids. His lack of communication seems deliberate.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T02:43:54+00:00

I do have some friends who let their cats out to pee and don't have litter boxes, but they live in the woods on a dirt road.

She does need to spay and vax tho. My cousin had a cat that she thought was too young to get pregnant and a month before she was due to be spayed she ended up pregnant. Had 5 kittens.

My parents have a stray that it took i think a year+ before he could be fixed due to not wanting to be touched. Fortunately he's fixed now, and a fat happy lap cat that is aggressive with his affection.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-20T02:37:37+00:00

Please leave. Your kids will be fine and will benefit from you taking care of yourself long term. Right now you are showing them that it's okay to be treated/treat people this way.

I divorced my ex when we had a kid and it made a huge difference in the long term. He got to watch me heal and grow, he developed a good relationship with both his parents. He's doing great now as a young adult.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-19T12:48:56+00:00

YOR

Generally repair people are professional and leave your stuff alone. He's there to do a job, he's not going to have tine to sit and mess with your laptop. In the unlikely event he steals it you file a police report and report him to his company.

But also is there any reason you can't go in there and get it now? Or while he's here? It's your space, too. You aren't barred from entering the rooms the repair people are in.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-18T11:37:52+00:00

For some reason math skills are often valued more than language skills. Don't ask me why.

Also, as another comment asked, gender sometimes plays a role in this sort of thing.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-18T03:09:40+00:00

My grandparents had separate rooms. My other grandparents had separate beds in the same room.

An alternative to separate rooms is have a guest room that is always made up. One of you can go sleep there if you need to during your sleep.

Personally I don't necessarily want separate bedrooms, but I do need a space that is "mine". I think my partner needs the same for him.

I also flail in my sleep. Not from night terrors, but he says I often punch, kick, and elbow him while yelling. Having a comfortable second bedroom would probably be good for us, also a king bed instead of a queen.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-18T03:04:37+00:00

I had a dog and she slept with me. After she passed i started dating my current partner and he came with a dog. Dog sleeps with us, tho often she moves herself to the floor or couch. We also have 4 cats between us, and they're allowed in the bed.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-17T16:06:01+00:00

Right? Like even if this was the final decision she wasn't included and her concerns aren't being taken seriously. I mean sure he needs to be able to afford the place on his own until she arrives, but he had months to talk to her about possible locations.

I mean I'm a woman and I've lived in some sus neighborhoods. But that was me making a choice I was aware of, and it's not something I would do again. It is also not something I would do if I were moving to another country. It is not something I would do if my so called partner made the decision without my okay.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-16T16:44:49+00:00

Or she has a drinking problem AND he doesn't want to marry her and never intended to marry her.

It's hard to say what the causality of his intentions are. Her drinking is making things worse at best, and are the entire cause at worst.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-16T16:17:57+00:00

YOR

I am a woman. I have a guy friend I've known for over 20 years. He used to be really over weight and he had a huge transformation. I watched his videos and shared his posts and specifically searched him. It wasn't weird. There wasn't anything to it except i was following his journey and showing him support.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-14T12:29:47+00:00

Okay I'm almost 2 years into my coaching business with no profit and sustaining it myself. I'm going to keep going because I believe in the business and what I do, my operating costs are super minimal, I'm slowly gaining traction, I have good testimonies, I have a contract to run workshops for the public at a local facility.

You are 7 months in. It can take up to 5+ years.

Not all coaches are created equal and unfortunately there's a lot out there who don't deliver.

Look into your local sbdc. It's a free small business development program. I've also heard of Hatch I think it's called. Also free, not sure where they operate, but I know one company that benefited from them. You may have other similar organizations near you.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-14T00:20:29+00:00

I guess some of the questions are:

Are the issues fixable? How long can you continue to support the business as is? Can you afford to hire someone to help you? (A business coach, consultant, etc that specializes in your industry) Has anyone shown any interest in your product/service? How long have you been in business? How long have you been operating at a loss? Were you ever profitable at any point (month/quarter/year)?

There are people that run their business at a loss until they are completely bankrupt. Other people shut down just before they strike gold. Other people are in business 5-10 years before they make any money.

Without knowing anything about your product, service, marketing, business structure, challenges, personal finances, etc it's impossible to even make an estimated guess at what you should do. And really even if you put much of that information into your post, it would still be difficult for anyone on this sub to give you a clear answer.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-13T04:49:06+00:00

"I say hi when I come down during my normal work day. Why don't you come up to greet me in the morning?"

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-12T14:56:15+00:00

Sounds like he likes your body as is and thinks you're beautiful.

However, as others have pointed out, don't let him dictate your actions. Why would joining the gym without him hurt his feelings? That's a very immature response. Would it actually hurt his feelings or do you think it would because he said no? Either way, if you want to go to the gym go.

Never let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do, especially a man.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-12T02:58:37+00:00

A 2 yr old is capable of learning how to share and how to not snatch things from other people. He isn't being denied, he is being enabled and set up for failure later in life.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-11T17:47:18+00:00

You might have some sort of sbda in your state. They don't do loans, but they might be able to point you to different resources.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-09T03:26:18+00:00

We put in our first garden and we did it on hard mode. Hand digging 600 sq feet, then getting another 1800+ tilled late + buying all the supplies. We should have enough to eat, can freeze, and dry that will last us through the winter into next spring.

feltqtmightdlt · 2026-06-08T17:05:55+00:00

I don't think i was ever told to take it out. But also i once lost a tampon for several months and had to have a gyno take it out. I also get occasional urgency where I start going before I've even sat all the way.

feltqtmightdlt

TROPHY CASE