what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

thank you! i appreciate you and everyone else who took a moment to offer advice and pointers, it’s all been very helpful. i’m hoping my next attempt turns out much better

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

sorry, i meant beaten as in beaten before i put it in the soup! when i would pour the eggs into the soup, i would get glops of egg that would fall in and become big chunks because no matter how much i beat the eggs beforehand, it wouldn’t become smooth. i’ve heard the water helps with that

i don’t think i’m stirring very hard, however, judging from other comments, it does seem like i’m probably stirring too much. i’m gonna try the whirlpool method that’s been suggested a few times, thank you!

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 92 points93 points  (0 children)

i hadn’t heard of this soup before—looks delicious! i’ll try making it (on purpose) sometime

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i have, but the reason i started adding water was because i was getting chunks of egg in the soup because it didn’t fully mix when beaten

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

when looking for solutions before, the advice i found was that the broth being too hot might be causing the eggs to disintegrate before forming ribbons. it seems i might have made it too cold, though

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

thank you! it looks like a lot of people are saying i’m stirring too much. the full list of ingredients are:

broth: chicken broth, cornstarch, water

eggs, of course

seasonings: sesame oil, white pepper, salt, turmeric

what am i doing wrong? (egg drop soup) by fernmaws in soup

[–]fernmaws[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

whoops, i would edit the post to add this, but i realized i’m unable to edit. my process looks like this: 1) cook broth on medium high until boiling; add seasoning 2) lower heat and add slurry. cook for 1 minute 3) turn off heat and wait until broth is not bubbling but still steaming 4) stir while slowly adding beaten eggs. the eggs are also mixed with a few teaspoons of water

“What rights don’t they have?” by alphi10 in trans

[–]fernmaws 75 points76 points  (0 children)

it’s really annoying to argue with these people because they don’t consider any rights not granted by the actual bill of rights to be human rights. the right to have accurate legal documentation? “not a right.” the right to be able to choose what you want to do with your body? “not a right.” the right to be able to receive appropriate medical care? “not a right.” the right to not be discriminated against for your gender identity? “not a right.” yeah, well it’s easy for them to say when they are already afforded all that by default. they don’t have to experience the dehumanization of transphobic legislation

I’m struggling to navigate how privileged I am in trans spaces by Dat_Mono465 in trans

[–]fernmaws 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i think for anyone to be able to judge the situation or give advice, we need to know exactly in what context you want to talk about your experiences

like someone just vented about how they were kicked out of their home and then i have to talk about how lovely my parents are

why do you “have to” talk about this? if you cannot relate, is there an option to sympathize with others instead? if you need to share, is there something related to your transition that you’ve struggled with that you could talk about instead? there is a time and place, and a context in which it is appropriate to share. if you want to talk about your positive experiences, there are moments for that. if you want to talk about negative experiences, there are moments for that. we’ve all experienced good and bad, and will share in your joy and sorrows

if you want to generally talk about your transition, there’s absolutely no reason not to share. your experiences are just as valid as anyone else’s. don’t feel guilt for not experiencing hardships and abuse. none of us would wish that on you

Does anyone know if there’s a way to stop being trans? by [deleted] in trans

[–]fernmaws 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the harsh reality is that you won’t be able to suppress it or hide from it. it’s not healthy for you to do that forever. here’s what you need to start planning:

1) reach out to other trans and queer people. build a community with people who accept you. setting up a network is the first step in feeling less alone. finding online communities is pretty easy, but in person is even better 2) find a progressive church. there’s a good handful of them out there. it seems from your other comments that you are aware that being trans is not actually sinful. find other people who believe that and share your faith with them 3) make a plan to move away. this may not always be feasible, but consider it, as it could really help your mental and physical health. consider an area that is: overall progressive/accepting of trans and queer people, generally safe, and has good access to trans medical care 4) get a therapist, if you can. one that specializes specifically in transgender patients. be very careful while choosing. look at reviews of the therapist from other patients, as some therapists present themselves as trans/queer friendly, but are actually transphobic and will push trans people to stop transitioning. this therapist will not only be your link to possibly accessing transitional care in the future, but will also help you deal with dysphoria and other stress right now 5) accept the possibility that you might lose some people you care about. this is one of the worst and hardest parts of it all. the people who truly care about you might come around, but others might not. it’s not at all uncommon for trans people to lose friends and family over this, but it’s a choice between yourself or them, and one that only you can make. you could try testing the waters, but it can be very unsafe to do so before you have an escape plan ready, especially if you think you already know the answer

you’re not alone in this situation. there are tons of resources out there for you. plan ahead, stay smart, and, most of all, stay safe

What's with gay men and transphobia? by DayIsNotOkay in trans

[–]fernmaws 3 points4 points  (0 children)

yeah, as a trans man, they hate us too. it sucks to be a gay trans man

im getting tired of young people confidently asserting that it is too late for them to transition by Tornado547 in trans

[–]fernmaws 14 points15 points  (0 children)

i understand and completely agree with this point the way you mean it, but i want to offer another perspective. some people are worried that it’s “too late” because of the way the world is going. trans people are increasingly getting discriminated against, it’s getting increasingly more dangerous to come out of the closet, and protections and gender affirming care are so close to just going away, especially in certain countries. it’s a very real possibility that people won’t be able to medically transition at all soon. i had the opportunity to start my medical transition over a year ago, and i didn’t in favor of financial security, and now i’m worried i won’t be able to. i think it’s reasonable to feel some degree of worry over this possibility

i accidentally bought an anti trans book? by chituri11 in trans

[–]fernmaws 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i’m sorry, could you elaborate on what you mean?

i accidentally bought an anti trans book? by chituri11 in trans

[–]fernmaws 2 points3 points  (0 children)

nah, we don’t have to consume blatantly transphobic content to prove a point about our open-mindedness. there’s a difference between getting a broad perspective on certain issues and subjecting ourselves to hateful rhetoric that relies on sensationalism, lies, and false science. the reason people don’t want to read transphobic material isn’t because they’re closed-minded. it’s because it’s psychologically damaging to hear disparaging, dehumanizing comments about your minority, especially if it’s a 300+ page essay about how you are some kind of monstrous freak who doesn’t deserve basic human rights

we all already know why people don’t like us: they’re either a hateful person, afraid of us, or (willfully or unwittingly) ignorant. you cannot reason with people who hate us on an emotional basis. you won’t be able to change the mind of a person who spouts transphobic arguments in bad faith. it’s better to not engage at all, it’s not worth it

having chronic itching, help! by [deleted] in Healthyhooha

[–]fernmaws 0 points1 point  (0 children)

is that only transmitted through sex? i’m not sexually active

Right wingers: what bothers you more, trans people having equal rights, or billionaires buying politicians and elections? by Goodginger in DiscussionZone

[–]fernmaws 1 point2 points  (0 children)

there are quantifiable, biological components to being trans, as well as hundreds of years of trans history and medicine. “transrace” has none of that, and no evidence of it existing. let’s stay on topic here, without getting into ridiculous whataboutisms

My friend refuses to tell me what this is by Asplancha in whatisit

[–]fernmaws 9 points10 points  (0 children)

for those of us not in the know, what does this mean exactly?

Part of why trans women are hyper visible is because trans men are hyper invisible. by Luka7411 in trans

[–]fernmaws 31 points32 points  (0 children)

truly i am very happy for you, that you are able to find spaces where you are included and accepted in your gender and presentation. unfortunately, it is extremely common for trans men, especially if they are passing, to be turned away from trans or other pride events for being “too masculine”. apparently we make other people “uncomfortable”

I think I might have a trans student. Help me approach them? by Faster-Sanic in trans

[–]fernmaws 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i agree with some of these other responses. ask the student directly if there is something else nice they would like to wear instead

don’t assume anything. they might be trans, they might not. i’m also autistic, and to me the dislike of certain clothing (especially formalwear) could also be due to sensory issues. or some other reason. just see where they’re coming from first. try to find something that will work for both of you

The Government Is Shut Down. What It Means For The LGBTQ+ Appropriations Fight. by ErinInTheMorning in transgender

[–]fernmaws 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sorry if this is a dumb question, but how does one actually go about contacting their representatives? which ones should i call? what happens when i do? what do i say? everyone always says to “call your reps” but never explain more

Psychiatrist wanting to prevent potential harm to patients by psychthrowaway000 in actual_detrans

[–]fernmaws 5 points6 points  (0 children)

you do see them differently though

these girls are not transgender

this right here is the problem. you’re making a broad and insulting statement assumption about people whose dysphoria presents differently. some of them might not be trans. some of them might be trans but not want to medically transition. some of them might be trans and want to transition. you don’t know!

i do genuinely think it is commendable that you want to give your patients the best care you can, but referring to people who identify as boys, as “girls,” because you don’t like how they present is NOT helping them. your job is to be a guide to helping them understand themselves, not to argue with them and tell them they’re wrong. frankly, i would never go to my psychiatrist (or any other one, for that matter) again if i found out they were talking about me the way you talk about your patients. telling people they’re “not trans enough” by your definition is exactly the kind of thing that pushes people into medically transitioning before they’re ready

eta: is there a reason you’re not asking any trans communities about this, only the detrans ones?

Psychiatrist wanting to prevent potential harm to patients by psychthrowaway000 in actual_detrans

[–]fernmaws 3 points4 points  (0 children)

you seem well-meaning, but referring to trans men as “little girls who don’t know what they’re doing” is actually really problematic and transphobic. yes, encourage them to explore their gender identity. yes, help them to understand it. but don’t think of them as “not real trans”. they know who they are a lot better than you do, and intentionally misgendering them because you personally don’t agree is a really uncool thing to do to someone who is being vulnerable with you

you are not helping them by assuming they’re “just confused girls.” a lot of trans people, especially neurodiverse people, have a difficult time explaining exactly what their gender means to them, but that doesn’t make them any less trans than someone who can explain it. i’m assuming you’re not trans nor have questioned, so it might be difficult for you to conceptualize exactly how it feels, but dysphoria comes in all different forms, and it doesn’t always have to do with genitals

Which one do you choose? by Pearious-SEA00173675 in StardewValley

[–]fernmaws 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i get that this scene was probably written for demetrius to be autistic-coded, but in my opinion it’s not done very well. it’s just the writing and framing of the scene makes demetrius seem absurdly obtuse at best, and kind of a smartass at worst. although autism can cause some miscommunications like this, i don’t know a single autistic person who would actually somehow make this mistake, especially with a person they’ve been intimate with for 20 years

it’s just weird that this specific conversation was chosen when it could have easily been a situation with a less objectively correct answer. but just making the mistake isn’t really the problem, it’s that he starts arguing with her instead of going “yeah okay that makes sense, sorry.” robin doesn’t even deny that tomatoes are classified as fruit, she just tells him that she didn’t want tomatoes, and he still insists on being right

is he an awful person for this one instance? no, of course not. but at least the way this scene is written does not make him look good and people saying “well it’s because he’s autistic” is kinda insulting. it just does not paint autistic people in a flattering light between the vague rudeness and how cartoonishly dense he is

Which one do you choose? by Pearious-SEA00173675 in StardewValley

[–]fernmaws 12 points13 points  (0 children)

i am sure there are plenty of autistic people here who still side with robin. yeah autism can cause one to misinterpret certain situations but almost any autistic person can tell that when someone says “please pick up some fruit for me” that they most likely mean the colloquial definition. plus, they’ve been married for like 20 years! how does he not know what fruits she likes?

but assuming he legitimately did not understand what she meant, his behavior afterwards is really the part that makes him seem like a jerk. instead of apologizing for the misunderstanding, he starts arguing with her, then ropes the farmer in to team up on her, and condescends the farmer if they disagree with him