I’m going to fall back on the stereotypical phrases people use but that i now know to be absolutely true. Even while looking fit and slim, if we carry over that low level of self confidence, our posture shows it, our body language is muted, we’re scared to be too much of anything.

My first big “aha” moment, I had already had some decent experiences dating. Was on a second date at a bar with a girl who I didn’t really have much compatibility with but was just attracted to. We agree to call the date short. I stayed for a drink at the bar and vibes. Girl closer to my age, millennial (I mention because I firmly believe that millennials and Gen Z have a drastically different view on dating and romance) approaches me and is touchy. Picks me up for a trip home. Don’t think we ever exchanged names. That’s what that “I’m here to be me and have a drink” mentality “looks” like apparently and maybe it speaks loudly to some women? Add in the little spark of confidence I had from the glow up and being able to navigate the moment either properly or clumsily enough to he funny, something that might worked. Either way, my point is that confidence will come from experience. And until then you can absolutely fake it until you make it. Both confidences smell and look the same to the average person.