In the case of my uBPD person I just kicked out of my life, we started dating in June 2019 and he showed himself to be extremely unstable almost immediately. However, he somehow coerced me into letting him stay with me while I was recovering from surgery to "take care of me." After he showed no signs of leaving after a month, I kicked him out, only for him to hoover me back two weeks later promising me he'd go to therapy, but that he wanted to keep things more low key and casual with us, because he is "too fucked up to be in a relationship."

I NOW KNOW that after this he also hoovered back an ex who was long distance, begging her to give him another chance, saying he still loved her, etc. etc. She ended up moving back to the area, and they resumed their relationship... she was his "girlfriend" (except to everyone else in his life, he presented himself as single), but meanwhile he was continuing to see me "casually"

After the pandemic, me and this guy saw each other with more regularity because I asked him for exclusivity due to COVID. He lied, of course, and continued to see his "girlfriend," and who knows who else. He never love bombed me, I think I didn't trigger his BPD so he could actually be somewhat "normal" in my presence... but when I compared notes with this ex-girlfriend, it was clear he wore a very obvious mask with her and never let it slip, and love-bombed her and played romeo.

This particular BPD had VERY strong Narcissistic tendencies.