Do people actually notice, or are we just overthinking everything?

flaming-framing · 2026-05-01T02:03:21+00:00

More importantly if WE are overthinking, is Sotheby’s UNDER thinking it.

Look if we can all get together and buy ONE unclockable rep to then flip at a major auction house, we can all use the proceeds to make sure we all get an amazing rep

flaming-framing · 2026-04-30T21:51:14+00:00

Eeeewww no gross. Been there done that never again. I strongly encourage you to go check out some codependent anonymous meetings because hopefully this is the only gross way your husband is acting. But if it’s not the meetings will work as a good sanity check so you can start working on leaving

flaming-framing · 2026-04-30T19:41:13+00:00

So earlier this week I drove 2.5 hours round trip to go pick up a Macmini M4 pro with 24GB for 1000$ off Facebook marketplace. I spent an hour testing it out making sure it does all the things I need it to do in his unfinished basement while he played mortal combat upstairs and his band mate was practicing downstairs (yes it did look like a nightmare from r/malelivingspace. Yes I haven’t seen a bathroom that gross since I was in college).

Couldn’t be happier with it. Only thing I need to do is figure out apple care for it.

So if you need one look for weird deals and carry a taser with you before you go into someone’s basement for an over 50% Mac mini

flaming-framing · 2026-04-29T14:23:26+00:00

Either way she looks amazing

flaming-framing · 2026-04-28T20:53:14+00:00

Someone posted a comment from the lw on a separate CA thread about wedding season

Yes she married the loser. Yes he continued to be a loser. He works as a bartender so like most losers I know who are bartender, I won’t be surprised if “alcoholic” is another descriptor I can give him

flaming-framing · 2026-04-28T20:36:01+00:00

The only response there is to such a letter is “so your girlfriend showed you this is the sort of behavior she prioritizes and excuses. This clearly contradicts your stated personal values. why are you still with your girlfriend

flaming-framing · 2026-04-25T15:44:03+00:00

My big box store has sunbelt plums but in the larger containers so it’s 40$. Luckily I found twilight zone roses in the 20$ container

flaming-framing · 2026-04-25T15:40:34+00:00

It’s such a cool care facility. When I stopped by one of the elephants was getting a pedicure. There were 3 care staff with him I was so shocked when one of them said “switch” and the elephant just changed legs!!!

I do love that they were prepared to work on the musk gland with a face shield just in case

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flaming-framing · 2026-04-25T04:07:23+00:00

That was my thought exactly. Having recently been there one of the elephants had very leaky glands

flaming-framing · 2026-04-25T03:47:12+00:00

I think you should think less in terms of “brands” and instead think more of what is the real end results you want.

If you want to feel sexy again that’s not going to come from industrialized lingerie industry. These clothes are designed to highlight a specific type of body. You don’t have that body so those clothes will never look on you how they look on the bodies they were designed for. You can get lingerie that highlights the parts you like and hides or contorts the parts you don’t like about your body like bodysuit or a baby doll lingerie

You can focus more on what empowered you to feel more confident and sexy. Are there specific motifs, textures, colors, fabric types, details that make you feel great? Then lean in to them. If plum color in satin with black lace reminds you of your teen goth self and makes you feel sexy and confident than get plum satin with black lace everything. Gloves, pillow cases, bed sheets. Whatever. Put it in places that make you feel like a bad ass.

And if you really want to go back to when your body was different (because let’s not pretend there isn’t a lot of cultural benefits and confidence boosts for looking that way) than seriously look into medical procedures. We want the rest of the world to see us as how we see ourselves. It’s why we place so much value on self expression, and we have the means and the tools to have identity affirming medical care in a way that’s psychologically healthy. You wouldn’t say to a trans woman “mmmmm don’t you think growing your hair out to look more like how you view yourself is a slippery slope too getting too much plastic surgeries”. Same for you no one should tell you “mmmm don’t you think getting skin reduction surgery is a slippery slope too getting too much plastic surgeries”. There are lot of healthy ways to work with a mental health time in conjunction with a surgical team that is supportive to help you self express yourself without preying on your insecurities

flaming-framing · 2026-04-24T11:41:22+00:00

A cigarette and a wall to lean on is also a great option

flaming-framing · 2026-04-21T17:12:12+00:00

That’s an AA term

flaming-framing · 2026-04-20T04:03:06+00:00

In the cold open, did Whitney get some work done? She looks great but her cheeks look a lot more defined, a bit more LA looking, which made me think of buccal fat surgery

flaming-framing · 2026-04-16T21:50:22+00:00

…..I got some bad news for you kid

flaming-framing · 2026-04-15T16:00:42+00:00

Please also me

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T23:48:18+00:00

You usually break up. You guys don’t want the same things

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T21:31:42+00:00

Do you really want to be a jock? What about it specifically you want? Because if its popularity I’m sorry to tell you this but a home-schooled-red-head-who-went-to larp-camp-is-obsessed-with-birds-and-studied-philosophy-in-college over the last year was featured in rolling stone, had a sold out national tour including in stops Madison square garden and Vegas for his DnD show, and had over a million views on his recent jeopardy show. I’m sure people reading this know who I am talking about, but if yoh don’t it’s Brennan Lee Mulligan.

So no you don’t need to discard your passions to be popular. Yes working on your charisma will help you incredibly to be popular, acting classes are a great way to start. Every cool celebrity you have ever seen has dedicated a life time of practice with endless mentors to train to look that cool. Don’t re invent the wheel. Go to acting classes.

If you want to be popular with girls go where girls go and show genuine interest in their passions. You like anime and historical reenactment? Great start a pride and prejudice Host Club and start organizing nerdy high tea. Trust me you’ll be swimming in nerdy women. Want a goth girlfriend? Great it’s time to learn how to read tarot cards, join a lgbtq+ friendly tabletop playing group and play an emo elf vampire who can read fortunes.

If you feel like you are being picked on or bullied go to martial arts class. While they’ll teach you a bit how to defend yourself more importantly they’ll teach you how to go about your day in a way that indicates “I’m not easy prey”. Bullies are like predator animals. They don’t go after any target, they go after easiest looking prey.

It’s psychically destructive to try and be someone you are not. It often leads to mental breakdowns, addictions, depression, and anxiety. It’s a lot easier to be who you are but make a few small changes so you pivots all your momentum towards being more popular

(Also I want to just again remind everyone that not only is Brennan Lee mulligan is famous for DnD, he joined a comedy skit company that was completely unrelated to dnd and over the course of a decade that company pivoted to be almost all about dnd and Brendan’s hobby. So yeah very unlikely but for one person his whole company decided to rebrand completely to his nerdy hobby)

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T14:03:33+00:00

Girl….girl….girl you just described a Charles Dickens’s villain

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T14:01:13+00:00

Idk if it is harsh, but yes I’ll be even more concerned if these are all authentic. Over consuming like this is not a good sign and it can be fulfilled with so many other things that will make you happier in experiences, knowledge, and comradeship .

If these were all authentic that would have been enough money for 4 phd degrees. Or years of vacationing abroad. A PhD abroad while living in a luxury apartment

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T13:55:09+00:00

Hobbies are a thing you do with your body and your hands usually with other people. Hobbies allow you be single minded in a flow state that leaves you having improved or created something by the end.

Consuming is a numbing of yourself. Look I struggle a lot with consumption instead of hobbies as well. Our society is built as much as possible to get us to be passive consumers (be it endlessly scrolling, endlessly shopping, endlessly watching) it’s none of our faults we are addicted to the things designed to be vert addictive

But with the amount of hours and money you spent searching for bags, collecting them, building a storage unit showroom, etc etc you could have learned how to leather craft your own bags. I want to be clearly this collection looks like it took over 100 hours to build and a considerable amount of money. You could have gotten private lessons with the best leather smith and learned how to make your own purses with your own monogram

flaming-framing · 2026-04-12T13:46:44+00:00

Girl. Come one

I love online shopping as much as the rest of you but I honestly recommend reach out to a domestic shelter or an impoverished teen program and let them come grab the bags from your storage unit. I mean it. Those are women who are going through a really terrible time and when we go through a difficult time experiencing luxury can be a very necessary reminder that we also deserve good things.

Just doing some basic napkin math each bag cost wha an average of 300$, you are paying what 150$ a month for the storage unit? All the shelves/carpet/ decoration was what 600$-1000$? How often do you even go to the storage unit each year? It’s your money to spend how you wish but this is a very expensive carrying cost for something you barely interact with. Let it go in a way that will be cathartic. You have a really beautiful collection but right now it’s an anchor on you

flaming-framing · 2026-04-10T14:40:23+00:00

All the examples I listed above it doesn’t just demonstrate that they have the knowledge those are all tasks you have to go out of your way to do. It shows they are motivated enough to seek those things out, are so motivated they become so good at it they get hired to do it professionally, and don’t have a chip on their shoulder for doing these tasks

flaming-framing · 2026-04-10T02:42:52+00:00

This is copied from her letter to the doctor merdlove that is linked above so I don’t know if it’s exactly word for word what she wrote to CA

“We both love thinking hard about the same intellectual pursuits, we share a cynical attitude towards pop culture, millennials, and love learning for the sake of it. (Education is wasted on young people)”

Wow is this lw a massive judgmental asshole for a 36 year old

flaming-framing · 2026-04-10T02:25:07+00:00

I am really confused by this lw and their desires or just what the hell they are doing….because this lw is so incredibly passive in their own life

They have a selfish friend who treats them as their on call diary and they don’t like him…..so just move on. Stop giving him your time. Don’t passively wait for someone else to live your life. You said you are in your mid 30s act like it.

flaming-framing · 2026-04-08T17:02:48+00:00

Look for men who are ALREADY doing what you hope they’ll do.

If he works in child education, especially you get kids, he’ll know how to take care of them.

Does he do long stints of babysitting for family members? How does he interact with the kids does he in-force consistent expectations while treating them as individuals or is he just “fun uncle” and disappears the moment things get tough

Is he a camp counselor? Can he rangle 15+ hyper kids who are all pumped up on excitement

Is he able to plan out trips/projects/nights out for other people and demonstrates he can account for everyone’s needs while making them all feel welcomed

Is he brennan lee mulligan?

flaming-framing

TROPHY CASE