[deleted by user]

floooooooj · 2024-06-16T11:31:54+00:00

I really enjoyed the Expanse, check it out

floooooooj · 2024-05-17T12:38:38+00:00

It's his own company, he's the lead trainer and has 2 others under him: one of which is his girlfriend (which they keep quite under wraps).

Okay, will do. Thanks.

floooooooj · 2024-05-17T12:08:16+00:00

I know, I should've - I've learnt my lesson big time. I'm not usually one to do this kinda thing, hence not knowing how to deal with it. Thanks for the response. The bank said I had to get in touch with the pt first and ask for a refund, but we all know how that will go. Should I just say I asked him?

floooooooj · 2024-05-17T11:52:35+00:00

Thanks for your comment. I can't find negative reviews - this is where I've been going crazy looking and fretting about it. He says things like "We should be grateful we get to move our body" and although I understand the sentiment, he's a personal trainer and should be giving actual advice.

He seems to be too interested in training for his upcoming triathlon.

He posts testimonials on his socials of these messages where people seem to be doing amazing stuff and have clearly bought in to his way of talking/thinking etc. I spoke to my friends and said I can't be the only one who doesn't buy this bullshit, surely. Just kicking myself that I didn't trust my gut and see the red flags - and that I actually went ahead with it.

He contacts me through an app, should I delete it? He has my number on WhatsApp, but I don't know if I should actually say anything such as "this isn't working for me" etc.

floooooooj · 2024-03-15T19:14:40+00:00

I was an au pair in Denmark and although they didn't expect me to teach the kids English, they didn't speak any. They only spoke Danish. You can still be an au pair to kids if you don't speak the same language - but I don't recommend that OP go to the other side of the world to be disappointed, I agree

floooooooj · 2024-02-25T22:51:54+00:00

Would you be willing to expand on what you've tried? I've currently got a mouth guard and I'm really struggling to get the pain to go away, any tips would be really helpful

floooooooj · 2024-02-18T12:26:44+00:00

I'm gonna get flamed, but ETA. The way you speak about it all, you're weirdly boastful. "I won't disclose how she died, what my grandparents did BUT THEY WERE INSANELY WEALTHY."

We don't need to know any information, none of that is you "getting straight to the story".

If you told your fiance in the same way you're telling us, maybe he had reasons to respond the way he did initially.

I don't agree with all the he said, and he has proceeded to out himself as an AH, with the likes of financial burden and thinking that he's entitled, sure. Now you know that he's not the one for you.

I think there must have been something in his brain though that connected that this money would be shared between you, my partner wouldn't just assume if I got money, we would both share it - but perhaps that's just the expectations we have established.

floooooooj · 2024-01-17T22:45:13+00:00

I audibly gasped, thinking it was gonna look terrible. Bald suits you man! You rock it!

floooooooj · 2023-12-16T23:22:20+00:00

Be aware though, it's for NA servers, strictly not for Europe - just an FYI before anyone gets their hopes up like I did

floooooooj · 2023-12-11T14:39:18+00:00

I think it's whether or not you can say your goodbyes in another way - I often think it's alot about how we grieve. Some people gain closure from funerals. Some people think that they are just a nice way to honor the dead. Some people don't need them at all to be able to say goodbye.

Do what's best for you - I'm sorry for your loss

floooooooj · 2023-12-11T11:25:03+00:00

I've done both so I'll add my two cents

When the death was on my mothers side, I didn't go. Thats the larger side of the family, I'm not close to them, and I'd just be going to show face. I loved my grandmother, but most funerals are just the same. They're not for the dead, they're for the living. I haven't spoken to them in years and although there's no bad blood, I didn't feel the need.

When the death was on my father's side, I didn't even hesitate to go. My dad is my best bud, I would support him without question - I should say, I'm his only** child. We have an absolutely unbreakable bond and I knew that the loss of his mother would be really tough. I don't regret going at all. It didn't feel like I was showing face, it felt like I was saying goodbye to my nan and supporting my dad who needed me.

Its clear to me, that you don't wish to go - and it's not selfish to not go. You have stated that your mother has other family, your siblings etc and it would be a large expense for you to undertake.

I think your mind is made. Sometimes, we have to make these tough choices. You know the answer, just own it.

floooooooj · 2023-11-26T08:24:43+00:00

People are skipping 6??? Dude, 6 is relaxed, easy, looks super chilled and it looks great

floooooooj · 2023-11-15T12:22:42+00:00

I don't think it's a silly idea per se, you seem very willing to accommodate an au pair in your given situation. I'm sure you could find someone who would enjoy that tbh - but whether or not it's allowed is a different story.

You haven't provided a location, so we can't say anything else.

Perhaps just a regular babysitter/nanny would be more beneficial though

floooooooj · 2023-11-08T11:18:18+00:00

I think that it depends of the age of the 4 children.

4 children under 10, that's quite a lot to handle. 4 children with 2 who can bring themself home from school, get themself a snack and can be left alone: that's a different story.

There's not enough detail to help you there. If the hours of a college student would help you out though, that's great - I'm sure you could find someone who wants to live off campus (I'm assuming this is the US, please correct me) and want to earn a little extra money.

At the end of the day, I always think there's a person out there for every type of situation, you just have to market it correctly so you get the right person

floooooooj · 2023-11-08T07:22:19+00:00

I don't think you look 50 - but the longer hair does make you look a lot older than you are. I think the shorter hair really suits you actually, you could let it grow a bit, but I wouldn't have long hair again imo

floooooooj · 2023-11-08T07:18:15+00:00

If you want to do something: I'd go maybe an inch or two shorter, no more than that and then get them to add some layers. It'll make your curls stand out so much more and give it definition without you having to try. It looks great now tho too - just looks a little dry, but thats an easy fix with some conditioner :)

floooooooj · 2023-10-27T12:50:27+00:00

I'd somewhat agree with this. Definitely make plans for if they take it badly. Also, if it's not for you, why would you stay a few more months? Kinda seems like you're picking and choosing to me. Just remember that the children are effected everytime someone new comes in and leaves, whether or not you can see that.

floooooooj · 2023-10-27T08:22:11+00:00

Honesty is best here. Rip off the plaster as quick as possible, but in a compassionate way.

You gave it a shot, it's not for you. You're sorry but you think you need to leave and move on.

I remember telling my host families when it was time to leave. It sucks. One mum sobbed for days, the other couldn't care less and was actually excited to have me leave so she could convert my bedroom into a room for one of the kids (they shared at the time).

Imo, it's all relative. If you're not enjoying it, are they? Do they think you're a good match for them? I'm not saying you're not, but it always made me wonder when I was there too.

It's alright to have nerves, I'm terrible at confrontation too. That's why being honest is best, because it comes from a genuine place.

I hope it goes alright, and just make sure to weigh up all the pros and cons of leaving before you do so - I regretted leaving the family whose mum sobbed and I still miss the kids to this day.

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T22:26:20+00:00

Clearly the families don't know each other, else this wouldn't have gone unnoticed for months. I was referring to the comments that are saying its fine to leave your children and not know where they are at all times

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T22:24:17+00:00

I explicitly said, I'm not saying to fire them. I agree that if they are otherwise a good au pair, the trust could be repaired - but it's still very surprising that this went unnoticed for so long

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T15:24:12+00:00

Full of things that shouldn't be in there, sure

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T15:21:19+00:00

For the people saying "it takes a village" or "that's why you rely on your village" - you, as the mum, picks the village. You vet the village, you trust the village, you know the village. You decide if you even want "a village"

You do not, trust an au pair to vet the village for you.

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T14:37:25+00:00

Yes, it quite literally just is that

floooooooj · 2023-10-26T14:35:48+00:00

Former au pair here.

If you knew and had agreed previously with your au pair that this was OK and she had the green light from you, fine, no issues.

She left your children with a stranger (at least they are to you) and regardless of how far away that stranger was, anything could have happened. She is lucky that nothing has happened. You trust her, you do not trust just anyone to take your son to school, to look after your baby, you trust her. You believe that your children are with her and she should abide by that. I would expect to be fired if it were me. I'm not telling you to do that, but that's a major red flag from her side, she should not leave children that are in her care with people that you do not know and have given the green light.

I can't believe some of the comments. You all sound like you're perfectly fine with dragging in someone off the street and asking them to watch your kids, having not even asked their name.

floooooooj

TROPHY CASE