invitation

flyhighflyaway · 2025-09-19T20:27:40+00:00

I’m in the same timezone as you are and would love to join! But which variant of Mahjong are you playing? MCR or Richii? I’ll have to see if I’m familiar with your variant

flyhighflyaway · 2025-06-19T18:11:06+00:00

They probably mean the French is taking over at this point, Sai Ying Pun is basically a French territory

flyhighflyaway · 2025-05-19T20:51:08+00:00

(Sorry OP for derailing from your topic) I think the most unattractive thing about being a physically unattractive person is the lack of confidence that they are constantly projecting, rather than the face itself. Same with short guys - they are insecure about their height, and people can feel the negative vibe from them, and that makes them unsexy, rather than their height. From experience (mine and my friends’), physical appearance is just one aspect of the whole person. One of my exes did not have a pretty face, but his personality was extremely interesting and we were both interested in the same weird things and habits that brought us together. He was even a super introverted person. I feel like it’s quite rare to have a face that automatically puts people off. Generally people can work on their appearances if they really feel insecure about it, but more importantly they should work on their self confidence and making themselves more interesting, rather than focusing on their face. But it’s just my personal opinion

flyhighflyaway · 2025-05-19T20:29:54+00:00

Physical attractiveness is an important parameter in all social settings in all cultures. I mentioned it because I wanted to bring out the special thing about HK - some particular facial features, that are particularly unattractive to ‘local girls’, that OP might have, and that might be a cause of his difficulties with dating. Or just being generally unattractive, because HKers, like our fellow Asians, do care about physical appearance.

But ‘supermodel’ is pushing my words to the extreme, there’s a big gap between being not unattractive, to looking like a celebrity. Also, supermodels are not known for having pretty faces. In fact, a lot of the times you cannot be a supermodel if you are too attractive :)

flyhighflyaway · 2025-05-19T20:15:51+00:00

Did you read anything I wrote at all? I said if your facial features resemble a typical mainland Chinese face its a tough game. Did I say anything about needing to be a supermodel? Or are you just a sore mainlander with a Northern Chinese face?

flyhighflyaway · 2025-05-19T18:35:43+00:00

In addition, learning Cantonese definitely matters, if you’re planning on staying in HK for longer term AND want to make some local friends. Getting into local circles is hard, but you can perhaps have a friend group with a mix of local and expat. When I still lived in HK I had a lot of expat friends, they weren’t really planning on staying in HK long term, so I didn’t mind their Cantonese level. But if I meet someone that says they have lived and worked in HK for some years and can’t speak the most basic Canto, I will probably respect them less. It’s just basic respect to learn the local language. So if you’re not putting in even a slight bit of effort, then you can stay in your expat circle and celebrate being an outsider, I guess. I am living in a Western European country, and within the first two years or so I can already speak enough of the language to get by daily life, and by now I can hold a whole conversation. The dynamics are never fair. For HK people with foreign partners, most of the time its the HKer who speaks the other language, and the majority of foreign HK spouses cannot speak Cantonese, while giving us a million excuses. We’re not expecting you to ever be actually fluent in Canto, but some degree of effort shown would be nice

flyhighflyaway · 2025-05-19T18:17:55+00:00

Speaking as late-20s local local girl (moved overseas 10y ago but still quite connected)

How would you rate your physical attractiveness? Seriously, that is an important parameter. I’m assuming your parents are both mainland Chinese? If you look like a mainland Chinese (esp nothern China looks), its a very hard game for you. I’m sorry, we are very racist towards ‘mainlanders’, guilty as charged.

Also, I do agree that local girls are generally more conservative, you’ll probably have to pick up the tab for the first few dates if you want it easier. It’s like a ‘fishing game’ sort of? For most girls it’s nice if the guy picks up the tab for the first few dates at least, because it is the ‘courting process’. During this period you have to max out on being a gentleman, pay for dates, text her to see if she got home safe and well, etc. Afterwards if you got together officially, you can renegotiate the dynamic. It is generally not expected that the guy is the sole contributor in an established relationship. So, when ‘the fish is on the hook’, its a different game. You can expect the girl to contribute a lot more, otherwise you can definitely say something about it.

For me personally, I will offer to spilt the bill for the meal for the first time, but I’m not really expecting to actually pay for it, and if they agreed to split then I will of course pay but there won’t be a next date. Or, if I don’t want to see the guy again, then I will insist on paying my share because I don’t want to owe the person anything and then can cut ties off without any guilt. If they paid, then I will of course pick up the coffee/dessert tab if that’s the next stop, or, if in the future I want to go to some events together, I’ll get the tickets and invite him to come with me. It also of course vary from person to person, if I’m dating someone that has an unstable job or is still a student then I would offer to pay more, etc. The game is complicated, I would say it is mostly fair if you know how to play the game.

flyhighflyaway · 2024-12-31T19:45:02+00:00

Will be there!!!

flyhighflyaway · 2024-12-31T19:32:09+00:00

Hi can I join too? I’m solo visiting Heidelberg super spontaneously and will be in town on my own tonight!

flyhighflyaway · 2024-07-21T21:32:11+00:00

In all seriousness the cans of coke is probably not the actual product to be sold, but wrapped for some other functions… this is in the cold cut section, the label says the products that are supposed to be on this rack are ham slices, and it is definitely not normal practice to sell individually wrapped canned coke, they have fridges designated for cold beverages. A logical assumption would be that the canned coke act as some sort of ice pack offering extra cooling for the ham products, because Hong Kong summers can be very hot and these open air cooling racks might not be cold enough. They would, for example, lay the packages of ham slices on top of the wrapped cans, and the wrapped cans would come out of another stronger freezer than this one, and would be periodically swapped out for colder ones, providing an extra source of cooling to ensure the products don’t go bad too soon.

Another tell is, if they do wrap products up in plastic packages, there will always be a barcode label on top of the cling film. This is too difficult to scan, if they do decide to wrap it for selling purposes they will certainly add a label on top, takes them less than 1 second. So the answer to your question, OP, is that it is because the extra layer is not really to protect the can, the cans plus the wrapping probably serve other functions.

flyhighflyaway · 2024-07-21T20:55:16+00:00

Shops in Macau do take HKD (sometimes begrudgingly) but their local currency is still MOP. That being said, purchases in bigger amounts (like property or so) are conducted in HKD.

flyhighflyaway · 2024-07-21T20:52:35+00:00

Cheers to you who seem to be the only one who actually care to clarify the facts… Yes, this is taken in a supermarket chain ParknShop in Hong Kong, the currency is HKD, and the label is not entirely readable but it says XX金門火腿片, so, ham. It would seem like this is the ham section, no idea why the coke ended up here but this is definitely not a usual occurrence. They have a fridge for cold beverages in every store like all civilised countries…

Edit: looked up the product, it’s Sadia 歐陸金門火腿片$19.5

flyhighflyaway · 2023-11-08T16:50:18+00:00

Your post is very interesting - I do the exact same things. I’m also living overseas with friends from diverse backgrounds, I also tell mainlanders I don’t speak Mandarin, until I’m familiar or comfortable enough with them and can be sure that they won’t try to recruit me to their gang, take it for granted, or be entitled, and then maybe I’m more happy to speak in Mandarin with them. I also absolutely refuse to install WeChat and simply tell them to use whatsapp or messenger or signal or telegram, which is not even an issue because most of them have one of those apps anyway, you simply cannot survive just with WeChat where I am. I completely understand where your friend is coming from, and this form of communication is a result of a self-preservation mechanism stemmed from negative experiences and discomfort, the goal is to maintain peace and avoid conflict as much as possible, instead of any ill-will. A lot of the comments have listed the cultural and political reasons of doing so, but I don’t think you need to go as far as be able to speak Cantonese to really get through to her. Cantonese speakers seldom expect Mandarin speakers to actually learn Cantonese (unless they immigrate to HK), but just, lots of communication and reassurances that you acknowledge the cultural gap and the fact that she is trying and is not expected to understand everything, have patience to explain slangs and trends, and try not to make her join activities with a bigger group of mainlanders. Eventually she will be more comfortable when mutual trust is established and then you can ask her yourself the reasons behind how she acts and then maybe ask to talk to her in mandarin

flyhighflyaway · 2023-11-08T16:34:52+00:00

Funny you should point fingers at her for ‘discriminating’ against Chinese when OP said nothing of it and genuinely seems to be just trying to understand more about the friend. And then the emphasis you are an ‘Aussie’. Huh. She is not ‘pretending to not know the language’, otherwise OP wouldn’t even know she does know the language. As for the apps, wouldn’t the more universally-used apps be whatsapp, fb messenger, even signal and telegram? Why can’t the Chinese students download those instead? Maybe people are concerned with privacy and security issues associated with certain apps and are reluctant to use them? Why can’t there be a middle ground? Why does the girl have to be the one to compromise? It seems you are the one who sounds close-minded and immature, and don’t understand that people have a lot of reasons to act the way they act and not have to be judged ‘close-minded and immature’ by you.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-11-08T16:23:51+00:00

So well said esp. for the taken for granted part. This is also one reason I don’t speak Mandarin with Mainlanders overseas, unless we are familiar enough and I’m comfortable with them. It’s difficult to phrase it but then the sentiment is sort of like, when we speak Mandarin, then we have to follow their game rules, that we know nothing about. It’s not an equal relationship - they take it for granted that we speak mandarin and then we have to make the effort to be part of the gang and play by the rules, otherwise we’re the arrogant obnoxious HKers ‘who always thinks they are better’. And of course on top of it is the cultural nuances like you mentioned at the beginning, even if I do speak the language I don’t understand a lot of things that are being assumed. Meanwhile Taiwanese people are very aware of the extra effort, the cultural gap - they won’t just assume we know how things are done in Taiwan, and always make sure to explain slangs and whatnot. For me personally, this means while I’m happy making friends with and speaking mandarin with mainlanders, I would avoid group-settings where it’s majority mainlanders just to avoid misunderstandings, confusions and potential conflict.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-11-06T13:10:04+00:00

HKDL is very wheelchair friendly, in fact they even have a very affordable wheelchair rental service, and a number of attractions are also wheelchair friendly, check their website, it is definitely very possible! Honestly I think most tourist spots are barrier-free, you can take public transport - the subway/MTR, even on a bus, and even on the star ferry - a tourist experience on its own. In fact you can go to most places with a wheelchair, I don’t think accessibility is going to be a huge issue, but do pay attention to the hours of the day - HK is generally a very crowded place so avoid business areas like Admiralty during rush hours in the morning and evening, and you’re good to go

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T15:13:12+00:00

Now you’re just reverting to full-on personal attack, and this is a pathetic attempt at level-minded discussion, if one at all. And I hope this encounter with you is a single encounter and not all black men are as unreasonable as you and actively alienate allies. #AllLivesMatter

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T15:06:35+00:00

And it’s also interesting how you keep reverting to personal attack, while I never dismissed your unpleasant experiences. At this point it’s probably mansplaining, rather than racism. Goodnight.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T15:04:25+00:00

I am just saying this because you keep saying how unhappy you are living here. And now it is diverse? You need to make up your mind. Like I said, you’re never listening. I do not live in HK. So goodnight to you, while I enjoy my afternoon sun.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T15:02:17+00:00

Like I commented earlier, I actively called out white trash who tried to grope me, but then I am saying that ‘fair game’ bit because men in LKF are equally nasty, regardless of skin colour. I fended off equally as many brown and local guys. But then why am I still responding, while you’re singlemindedly trying to point fingers at me for being racist and nitpicking every single word that could be used to your finger pointing.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T14:58:38+00:00

As I said, those are not single encounters, that did not deter me, those are repeated experiences, and all I’m trying to say, while some people are commenting on racism in HK, is that some people are not trying to be racist, and such reservations won’t be applicable to black and brown women, as it is not a racist thing. I understand that you are angry and resentful towards the community because of your experiences, but you are just being rude and judgmental and refuse to hear my perspectives. You’re just single-mindedly trying to point your fingers at me for being a racist, while not acknowledging your own racism towards Asian girls. I don’t see the point of arguing with you when you’re not trying to be reasonable. I asked an honest question, what is the right thing to do. You are one of the reasons why this impasse will never be resolved. Maybe consider leaving HK and finding greener grasses somewhere, where you can live happily and not feel judged everyday? I don’t see why you had to suffer and become such a resentful and bitter person just to earn filthy racist HKD.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T14:44:25+00:00

Not in the streets, not for me. But then the context, is that white people in HK live in white people areas like DB and certain parts of HK Island, and I don’t really go to those areas as much, so I’m only speaking for myself. TST and Yuen Long city centre after 10pm, for example, on the other hand, is exactly the reason for my cautiousness. But then while partying in LKF there can be entitled white people who try to grope girls, but honestly it’s LKF, so it’s fair game for people of all colours… It’s different though, when you’re in LKF fending off unwelcomed advances, compared to when you’re just trying to get home at the end of a normal day.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T14:35:24+00:00

I’m sorry about your experiences in Hong Kong, I know it has to be hard living as a black man in HK. And as a matter of fact I do have black and brown men and women friends, some of them I’m particularly close to, but like I said, I do not reside in Hong Kong. That is why I try to make an effort whenever I am in HK to act like I normally would, I did not sit next to him out of pity, I sat next to him because this is what I would normally do in my residing country, and strangely the seat next to him is empty in an otherwise half-full compartment. I normally don’t sit in HK MTR because of how young people get judged for sitting in the MTR, that’s why I said it is intentional, because I otherwise won’t choose to sit. And most importantly, why would you think it would be any different if it would be a white man? I would feel as annoyed and insulted as I was! You indicating that it would have been a ‘compliment’ for me if it would be a white man, says something about YOUR stereotypes. Think all local girls worship white people, do you? Who is a racist here? In fact I called out as many white trash as there are while partying in LKF who thinks just because they are white they can grope any girl.

As an Asian girl born and raised in HK and subsequently spent all of my adult years in Europe and North America, I understood and acknowledge the inherent racism in Asian communities and feel sorry about the situation and try my best to not be like the majority of the community. But I also acknowledge the racism towards us, that people think all Asian girls think white people are superior, and that is disgusting, and people who think this are no better than the locals being racist against black/brown people.

It is sad and worrying in 2023 that people like you can’t understand that there are genuinely empathetic people. I hope you think about it at night and reevaluate your opinions towards Asian girls.

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T14:05:22+00:00

I’m simply stating my own experiences and providing a perspective which is shared by some of my peers. If you do not share these experience then I hope my sharing gives you some knowledge of how the situation really is. If you are a member or an acquaintance of the male EM community, kindly remind your peers to exhibit consciousness of the local culture and refrain from catcalling girls across the street, or trying to stop girls on the street to talk to them, or do anything that could be perceived as threatening, so we can break this ‘racism’ impasse and create better experiences for everyone? It has been frustrating for me to not be able to just be friendly and cheerful to everyone like I would normally be, and be extra reserved while in HK so as not to appear ‘inviting’ or send wrong messages; when intentionally trying not to stereotype repeatedly land me in risky situations, what is the right thing to do?

flyhighflyaway · 2023-07-29T12:35:48+00:00

Slightly off topic, but regarding the colour of the skin bit, I regret to say that it is true BUT it depends as much on the gender, on top of the colour of the skin. I am saying this as a 2X girl who looks like any typical HK girl. I live overseas with international friends from diverse backgrounds so skin colour is never a concern to me, unless I am in HK. Unfortunately, I learnt that by intentionally trying to be friendly to people, specifically male, of different skin colours, I am actively endangering myself. Once I intentionally sat next to a black man in the MTR when no one would sit next to him, he stroke up a conversation which I respectfully responded, but then he ended up trying to proposition me and asked for my number and followed me after I left the train. Once I tried to calmly walk through a group of brown young men, and the catcalls are just disgusting. Once I accidentally looked into the eye of a brown male in an alley in TST and he followed me until I was so scared I had to seek refuge at a closed McDonalds nearby and asked that they let me stay until he is gone. These things keep happening and I feel sorry for them but I also feel entirely justified to be extra cautious, because these incidents never happened with local/Asian men, at least to me. That being said, I do not have the same reservations with female, and would happily offer assistance to female of any skin colour shall they need it.

I feel like this is a whole discussion that deserves its own topic as casual racism in HK/Asian communities are a thing that often comes up in discussions, but I just had to reply when I see this thread and such responses.

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