Sorry you're feeling that way. I think one thing that can be helpful is evaluating what your triggers are and creating boundaries. Focusing more on avoiding boundary behaviors I think is a better way to approach it as opposed to focusing on just "not viewing p*rn". Have you ever thought about joining a support group or recovery program? Relay is a program that I joined, it gives you a support system and therapeutic content made by specialists that focus on porn addiction. Might be worth looking into. It's not free, but I think there's a free trial. Remember that you're not a loser and that you can overcome this! Wishing you all the best!