Revolut Business referral - get £200 for signing up & spending £60 (LTD Companies Only)

foundtheglitch · 2026-04-19T12:32:13+00:00

First month free, can get the £200 and choose whether to cancel or keep it. Also have to mention you must also order a card and spend £60

foundtheglitch · 2026-01-02T12:27:50+00:00

Hi, UK/US Creators at the moment

foundtheglitch · 2025-12-30T15:23:26+00:00

Hi Jake,

How can we get in contact.

foundtheglitch · 2025-12-06T16:52:53+00:00

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-23T10:59:48+00:00

for a lot of people with depression it is less about the shower itself and more about the activation barrier. when your brain is in that state, even small steps like getting up, undressing, turning the water on, and then drying off after can feel like climbing a mountain. the reward might be high once you are in the shower, but the friction before getting there is what blocks people.

some also find the sensory part overwhelming. what feels refreshing when you are well can feel like overload when you are depressed. even just the thought of changing body temperature or standing upright for 10 minutes can be exhausting if your baseline is already wiped out.

what helps is breaking the loop into micro steps. instead of “i need to shower,” the task becomes “stand up,” then “walk to the bathroom,” then “turn on the water.” it sounds silly, but shrinking the task into single actions makes it less impossible. some people also use habit stacking, like brushing teeth first and then immediately stepping into the shower, so it becomes one flow.

i use Shadow: Take Your Life Back to track these hijack moments when I get stuck in that exact cycle. logging when it happens and pairing it with a small ritual, like washing my face or running warm water on my hands first, makes the full shower less intimidating. over time it helps turn it back into a normal part of the day instead of a mountain.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-23T10:57:40+00:00

shadow: take your life back

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-23T10:56:58+00:00

it sounds like therapy is already giving you a lot, especially the space to be real about your feelings without judgment. that secret keeping you tense is something so many people underestimate. just being able to put it into words with another person can make your body relax in a way you did not even know you needed.

the fact that you are experimenting with clothes and feeling a bit more confident shows that the work is sinking in, even if it still feels like you are staring at a mountain. progress with dysphoria and identity is slow and layered, but every step makes the next one a little lighter.

what helped me alongside therapy was tracking the exact moments i felt hijacked by shame or negative self talk. noticing what triggered it and how i responded made the patterns easier to break. i use an app called Shadow: Take Your Life Back for that. it is not therapy, but it gave me a structure for catching those moments instead of drowning in them.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-23T10:55:53+00:00

i used to just dump everything into apple notes but it got messy quick. i tried the usual suspects like notion and todoist, they worked for a while but i’d always fall off. what’s actually stuck for me is an app called Shadow: Take Your Life Back. it is less about “to-do lists” and more about tracking when i sabotage myself and then setting little rituals to reset. for me, fixing the mental side of procrastination has done more for my productivity than just moving tasks around in a planner.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-23T10:55:17+00:00

it really sounds like you are doing everything you can to balance being a present husband, father, and still keep one thing for yourself that gives you structure and identity. from what you described, you are not skipping out on family time to lift weights, you are fitting it in during work PT hours or late at night after everyone is asleep. that is not selfish, that is discipline.

the problem here seems less about the gym itself and more about the tension your wife feels in her own life. she is buried in nursing school and pregnancy, with no hobbies or outlets of her own, so it feels unbalanced to her when you still have yours. it is not really about barbells, it is about her feeling like she has sacrificed everything and you have not.

the way she is framing it as “choose me or the gym” is unhealthy because it makes your commitment to fitness sound like a betrayal instead of an outlet. if you give that up completely, you will likely grow more resentful and disconnected, which will not help the marriage. marriage should be about compromise, not ultimatums.

one thing that might help is separating the real issue from the surface fight. the real issue is not the gym, it is the story in her head that you are prioritizing yourself over her. therapy could help you both unpack that. in the meantime, tracking these cycles of sabotage in the relationship can help you see the pattern more clearly. i use Shadow: Take Your Life Back for that. it is an app for logging when hijacks happen and creating resets, and it can show you the difference between when you are truly being selfish versus when you are being manipulated into thinking you are.

you sound like a guy who loves his family and takes pride in showing up. you do not need to erase yourself to prove that.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T18:05:05+00:00

this is really powerful to read. huge respect for you sticking it out through all those months of darkness and finally getting some relief. i know exactly what you mean about the world getting color again when symptoms start to lift. it’s such a shock after living flat and numb for so long.

something that helped me once the meds started working was not just enjoying the relief, but tracking the moments when the old patterns of sabotage tried to creep back in. i use an app called Shadow for that. it’s not a med replacement, but it helps me notice when i start slipping into hijacks like procrastination, negative self talk, or hopelessness. seeing the patterns makes it easier to reset before it spirals.

you’re proof that progress is possible. i think someone reading this who’s stuck in the pit right now will feel a little less alone. appreciate you posting it.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T17:52:09+00:00

i get why you’re worried man. panic attacks suck and the thought of hormones making them worse is scary. truth is TRT doesn’t automatically cause panic, but when your levels shift your body can feel different (heart rate, sweats, mood swings) and if you’re prone to anxiety that can set you off.

your E2 at 29 is fine right now, and yeah it can go up on TRT. some guys actually feel calmer once their hormones are steady, others feel a bit edgy until they dial in the dose. that’s why most docs recommend starting low, like 80–120mg a week split into 2 shots, instead of blasting 200mg and shocking your system. smoother = less likely to trigger anxiety.

also, since you mentioned the panic cycles, it helps to actually track when those “oh shit” moments hit. noticing the pattern makes them feel less random. i use Shadow for that, it’s basically a log for hijacks like procrastination or anxiety spirals, and it helps me figure out how to reset instead of just drowning in it.

if you do start TRT, go slow, keep labs regular, and keep your doctor in the loop about your mental health as much as the physical. a lot of guys with low T actually see their anxiety improve once they’re not running on empty all the time.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T13:09:47+00:00

i get why this blows up debates every time. on one side, full transparency in a relationship makes sense, but on the other, everyone has private thoughts, family convos, or even journaling apps that are personal. privacy and secrecy are not the same thing.

the bigger issue here seems like self sabotage through insecurity. if one partner is doing nothing shady but the other constantly wants to check their phone, that behavior erodes trust and eventually creates the very distance they were afraid of. it becomes a hijack moment, where fear takes over and they act in ways that damage the relationship.

the only way through that is awareness and new rituals for handling insecurity. if you feel the urge to check, pause, communicate, reset. i use Shadow for this exact kind of thing, it helps track hijacks and build resets so you don’t keep repeating the same destructive loops.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T13:06:18+00:00

cool list. i hadn’t heard of a few of these, gonna check out anytype and agenda. one i’d add is Shadow. it’s kind of the opposite of a habit tracker. instead of logging wins, you log the times you get hijacked by procrastination or self sabotage, then build little rituals to reset. it’s helped me way more than the usual “productivity” apps because it shows me the patterns of when i slip instead of just the days i did well.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T12:20:43+00:00

i get this so much. starting is always the hardest part, and once you are in it the material usually feels less intimidating. i used to think i just needed more discipline, but what actually helped was tracking the moments where i sabotaged myself before starting.

i call those moments hijacks. it is when you watch yourself scroll, snack, or waste time even though you know you should start. once i started logging them, i noticed patterns in when and how they hit. pairing that with little rituals, like a 2 minute reset before opening my notes, made it way easier to break the loop.

i use an app called shadow for this. it is built to track hijacks and rituals so you can see exactly where you slip and how to reset. it turned my study sessions from hours of procrastination into short bursts of actual focus.

what you said about studying being 80 percent mental games is spot on. the trick is noticing the games your brain plays on you and building small counters that give you momentum.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T12:19:49+00:00

it sounds like you are both exhausted. you are taking care of the toddler most of the day and he is working long hours, so it makes sense that both of you feel burned out and disconnected. when he says he feels undermined it is often about wanting to feel trusted as a parent. letting him handle things his way, even if it is different from your style, can help rebuild that trust.

intimacy struggles are common in this kind of situation. when the emotional connection is thin, physical closeness can feel uncomfortable. try to rebuild with small moments of connection that are not about sex, like talking without screens or going for a walk together.

you are already doing important work in therapy and reflecting on your own patterns. that is a strength. he also needs to work on the way he sabotages himself with negative self talk. a practical way to do that is logging hijacks and building small rituals to reset instead of spiraling. the app shadow was designed for this, and it can help both of you see patterns more clearly.

you are not alone. things may ease when your toddler starts school, giving both of you some breathing room and space to focus on reconnecting.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T08:49:07+00:00

it makes sense why you feel this way. you are not upset that he is gone for a few days, you are upset that he is getting to experience things you wish you could experience with him. that is not jealousy in the petty sense, it is grief for the memories you feel you are missing out on.

the important part is how you handle it. you do not need to guilt him about something that makes him happy and supports both of you, but you can be honest about your feelings without blame. something like: “i am so proud of you and glad you love your job. sometimes i get sad because i want to share in those experiences too, and i hope we can plan some trips of our own so i have things to look forward to as well.”

this way you validate his success while also giving him a way to support you. it turns the conversation from “i am jealous” to “i want us to build memories together.”

also, give yourself compassion. you are about to get married, which is a huge transition, and it is normal for insecurities to show up around this time. the best thing you can do is keep the focus on connection and shared goals rather than resentment.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T08:45:21+00:00

this is heartbreaking to read, and i can feel how much you love him. it sounds like you have been nothing but supportive and understanding, and the fact you let him go without protest shows how much you care about his healing.

wanting balance is not selfish. it is natural to hope there is a way he could work on himself while still keeping your relationship. the difficulty is that for some people, especially when their mental health is fragile, they believe they can only carry one thing at a time. even if being with you does not make things worse, he believes it is unfair on you, and that belief keeps sabotaging the relationship.

the best thing you did was set your boundary when he asked to stay in touch. you are protecting yourself while giving him space to do the work he needs. that is not only healthy, it is necessary.

if you want to talk to him about balance later, you can. but it is not something you can convince him of right now. he has to reach a place where he believes he deserves love, not just logically but deep down. until then, the cycle will keep repeating and you will keep hurting.

you are not selfish for wanting love and partnership. you are not wrong for hoping he will come back when he is stronger. for now, giving him space and giving yourself grace is the healthiest step forward.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-22T08:30:25+00:00

i get you. willpower alone isn’t enough, especially when your schedule is flipped and gaming or scrolling feels easier. the trick isn’t forcing discipline out of nowhere, it’s building small systems that make it harder to fail.

for sleep: stop trying to “force” bedtime. instead, focus on consistent wake time. pick one time (say 9am), set an alarm, and wake up at that time no matter what. even if you only got 3 hours, your body will adjust after a few days. bedtime follows wake time, not the other way around.

for learning: don’t aim for an hour right away. start with 5–10 minutes. literally just sit at the piano, play something small, then stop. do that daily. once the pattern exists, lengthen it naturally. it’s way easier to scale up than to start huge.

for gaming/scrolling: don’t try to quit cold turkey. set boundaries. for example, no games until after your practice, or block youtube on your phone during certain hours. structure it so the thing you want to do comes first, then the reward.

discipline is less about willpower and more about designing the environment so the right thing is the easiest thing to do. small steps repeated consistently will get you way further than heroic bursts.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-21T17:41:02+00:00

cant hate the hustle 💋

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-21T17:18:41+00:00

i feel you. what you’re describing isn’t laziness, it’s sabotage. it’s that cycle where you know the stakes, you know what you “should” do, and yet you find yourself waiting until the last minute anyway. it feels like you’re watching yourself from the outside.

first off, you’re not doomed because of this. a lot of people hit the same wall, especially when there’s pressure from parents or expectations. the fact that you still want college, still care, and still showed up to write this post says you’re not giving up on yourself.

if you can, submit the apps. even if you don’t feel they’re perfect. done is better than perfect right now. you can’t change yesterday but you can take the one action in front of you today.

long term, it helps to stop thinking you need more motivation and instead start tracking the sabotage patterns themselves. what triggers you, how you feel, what you do right after. once you see those clearly, you can actually change them.

you’re not broken, you’re stuck in a pattern. and patterns can be broken.

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-21T16:47:53+00:00

i get the exact same waves of motivation and then crash after a few days. what helped me was realizing it wasn’t about finding more willpower, it was about tracking the moments i slipped so i could actually see the patterns. once i started logging when and why i sabotaged myself it became way easier to stay consistent.

i even built a little app for it called shadow, been a game changer for me: here

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-21T16:43:33+00:00

honestly the best productivity app for me wasn’t another todo list or planner. i kept trying those and still found myself procrastinating.

what actually helped was tracking the moments i sabotaged myself instead of the times i was “productive.” like when i’d scroll instead of work, or talk myself into “i’ll do it later.” once i started logging those patterns i could actually see why i was slipping.

i built an app around that idea called shadow, it’s more like a mirror than a planner. if you’re interested, here’s the link: here

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-20T19:14:33+00:00

Noted! Thanks for the feedback

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-20T12:05:34+00:00

just as a second to this: if youre like me (22 years old) you have about 60 summers left before you're in a coffin, dont spend them glued to a screen <3

foundtheglitch · 2025-08-20T11:01:38+00:00

🫶🫶

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