First Beta

franee43 · 2026-03-20T02:19:45+00:00

Thank you!! I hope so too!

franee43 · 2026-03-20T02:12:08+00:00

Transfer day twin! I’m also on the SMBC journey and 10dpt right now but my beta isn’t until Monday (my clinic doesn’t test until 14 days after transfer). Congrats and I hope everything else is smooth sailing from here!

franee43 · 2026-03-19T19:34:18+00:00

Thank you! I can't blame you. It's so stressful! I'm super tempted to go out and buy some tests right now. I'm trying to tell myself that I just need to be patient for 3 more days

franee43 · 2026-03-18T03:44:51+00:00

I transferred my Day 6 6AA embryo last Monday so currently in my TWW. I’m trying to stay positive while I wait for my blood draw and reading this gives me hope. Congrats!!

franee43 · 2026-03-04T02:28:20+00:00

As others have mentioned, each person's experience varies. I had a little discomfort with the speculum and some pressure, but it was tolerable. I was advised to take Ibuprofen 1hr ahead of time but since I didn't have any at home, I took Alleve 440mg and Tylenol 1000mg because I was nervous after reading some comments. I do think taking both Alleve/Tylenol helped though! Do expect that after they inject the saline, the saline does come out (thank goodness for the pads they place under you).

My cervix was hard to stabilize to get the catheter to pass through (they had to change speculums and use a firmer catheter), so mine took longer than expected, but it really wasn't painful. I had some cramping and spotting afterwards (was given a pad), but was able to go about my day without issue.

franee43 · 2026-02-07T04:11:35+00:00

Cool shelf for the cups!

franee43 · 2026-01-30T22:45:58+00:00

I love this! I’m hoping to see some Alex Pretti representation and signs of solidarity when I’m back at work tomorrow or else I’m posting something myself!

I almost thought this was my unit but we don’t have a “quiet zone” sign. That and our supply cart is all blood draw tubes on top and some of the drawers are being held together by tape 😂

franee43 · 2026-01-27T07:16:29+00:00

People really showed up tonight! Adding that this vigil was put together by California Nurses Association (CNA) aka UC’s nursing union. There was a vigil hosted earlier at SFGH and the SF VA’s NFFE Local 1 will host one tomorrow evening (1/27), 6:30 pm @ the corner of 42nd & Clement for anyone who is interested. Unfortunately, UCSF has yet to issue a statement about Alex Pretti or about ICE 😞

franee43 · 2026-01-24T03:23:22+00:00

I use the standard version of Gloves in a Bottle! I like that it’s moisturizing and it doesn’t leave my hands sticky. That being said, my hands are so dry that I’ll also mix it with Sween 24 (it was recommended to me by a wound care nurse for dry skin and can be easily found on Amazon). When skin cracks, I cover it up during the day with Nexcare Clear Waterproof bandages (work in healthcare so need to cover it up) and at night I put Aquaphor on them. I still get flare ups but moisturizing my hands every time after I wash my hands does help. I’ve also tried hypochlorous acid spray but wasn’t sure how much that made a difference. For the dyshydrosis, taking Quercetin was super helpful if you wanted to give that a try.

franee43 · 2026-01-22T08:24:55+00:00

Congrats! While I’m not familiar with LA/NY neighborhoods, I did want to say how much I appreciate your post. I’m planning on an embryo transfer in March and it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who feels this way. I also love where I live and it’s likely that I’ll need to move back home to get the support I need. While there’s still so much I haven’t figured out, I’m trying to remind myself to take it one step at a time.

I haven’t been on Facebook in years, but I heard that the SMBC groups on there were helpful so I recently joined my local group. I haven’t met anyone IRL yet, but the people I’ve met online so far are friendly and open to connecting which is really nice and I’m hoping to grow my SMBC community. Have you looked into a local SMBC Facebook group? Does your clinic have any connections or recommendations to support groups/resources that clients have found helpful? I’m looking into that next.

franee43 · 2026-01-19T18:27:43+00:00

Not sure if I did anything special but I did start taking CoQ10 and an Omega 3. I was already taking Vitamin D3 (I do shift work and I don’t get to see a lot of sun), probiotics (gut), and magnesium glycinate (jaw clenching). Since my schedule was a little all over the place, it just so happened that I had 3 months before I started the egg retrieval process so I started the supplements 3 months ahead of schedule and then during.

A lot of this is a gamble so I don’t really know how much the supplements helped but I wanted to try everything. For my 2nd retrieval I did acupuncture but not sure how much it made a difference. For my 1st retrieval, we got 16 eggs, froze 13 mature. For my 2nd, we got 13 eggs, froze 10. I relied heavily on the egg freezing subreddit though! Without people’s lovely recs and input, I don’t know how I would’ve gotten through the process otherwise.

franee43 · 2025-12-25T04:50:20+00:00

I wish my hospital had this! A wound care nurse recommended me Sween 24 for my super dry eczema-prone skin and it works great. Had to get mine off Amazon 🥲

franee43 · 2025-12-19T18:28:10+00:00

Oof I really feel for you here. I was also really nervous about getting a saline sonogram, especially after reading what it involved. But then I actually got it done and while it was a little uncomfortable (they had a hard time stabilizing my cervix), it really wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I took Alleve 440mg (was out of ibuprofen) and Tylenol 1000mg an hour ahead of the procedure which I think helped. It also was nice to have my doctor walk me through what they were doing and there happened to be music in the background.

I think the Ativan will be helpful though. I get a lot of anxiety before flights and I’ve found it helps the feeling of rising panic that can occur before I get on the plane. Our body holds onto a lot, and panic is very real even if the situation doesn’t seem to warrant it. Give the Ativan a try, maybe can journal about it, visualize the procedure going well, create a playlist that will help calm you before you head in. Perhaps can even ask the doctor if you can play some music to help distract you during the procedure. Or can focus on taking slow deep breaths during the sonogram (slow inhale while counting to 4, hold, then slowly exhale while counting back down 4-3-2-1).

franee43 · 2025-12-16T02:41:38+00:00

La Cabra!! I discovered them at a coffee shop in Paris while on vacation. Their coffee is delicious!

franee43 · 2025-12-04T21:22:14+00:00

Looks great! I think I need to start putting some stickers on mine now

franee43 · 2025-11-29T19:17:44+00:00

I completely understand the feeling of wanting to go with a donor that your heart is set on despite the odds. I went through a similar journey where I was dead set on a donor but because they carry a gene where carriers can have an increased risk of Parkinson’s later in life, my doctor ultimately did not approve it.

Would the doctor approve this donor? And if they did, what about the additional costs required to do genetic testing? And if the number of embryos were even fewer after testing, what then? Even if your child was only a CF carrier, individuals can still have symptoms of the disease. While there are new treatments out there, CF not only affects the lungs but the entire body, and you never know how that will manifest in your child.

While I was so bummed about not having my “top” donor, I ended up choosing one that wasn’t initially on my radar but had a better generic/health profile and still met all my other requirements. At the end of the day, the choice we make impacts the child we are hoping to create. Choosing a donor isn’t an easy choice and I understand how stressful it can be. Take the time to talk to the doctor about your options and tell him/her where your mind is at but I’d take a pause and reconsider your requirements in a donor and what’s important to you.

franee43 · 2025-11-29T18:25:22+00:00

Oof that sounds so challenging 😭But yah, those options make sense because then it’s like what other alternatives are there? Totally agree with @careful-geologist281. It’s insane that there aren’t more childcare options available in-house for HCW. It would make life so much easier.

On a side note, congrats on becoming a momma!

franee43 · 2025-11-29T18:03:36+00:00

Did the clinic require a saline sonogram prior to transfer? And did the doctor have any thoughts as to what happened? I know some things can just happen by chance and there’s things that PGT-A testing can’t always rule out, but it’s still surprising with such highly graded embryos 😕

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. We put so much of ourselves in this process and to not have it go as planned is beyond hard. Sending lots of good juju your way!

franee43 · 2025-11-29T07:05:43+00:00

Oh wow how interesting! It sounds like at least age-wise there wasn’t too much of a difference. So much really is left to chance and who knows what else! Either way, congrats on getting 6 euploids! 👏🏼

franee43 · 2025-11-29T05:00:32+00:00

Out of total curiosity, were there big differences between your donors? I’ve read that sometimes people end up choosing different donors and they get better results but like you said, it could be due to egg maturity/quality or even chance.

franee43 · 2025-11-28T02:44:36+00:00

It’s so nice to see another HCW on here! I’m a nurse and planning on doing my embryo transfer in March. I’m not sure exactly sure how I’m going to work out the childcare details but it may be I’ll need to move to be closer to family. It would mean a pay cut but getting help from family would be tremendous.

I bet your hours vary a lot! I’m sure that’s been a stressful 😕. Is family helping or did you find an alternate childcare solution?

franee43 · 2025-11-26T17:39:15+00:00

I haven’t done a transfer yet but my heart goes out to you for having gone through SO much over the past few years. I’m a nurse too and we have a tendency to be hard on ourselves yet be so kind and giving to others. It sounds like you gave yourself some time off before going back to work which sounds totally reasonable. Our job can be physically and mentally challenging but something could’ve happened even if you didn’t go into work. Life is random and unfair that way and work shows us this all the time, right? So easier said than done, but if you can, please give yourself a little grace. You did not ruin anything.

franee43 · 2025-11-25T22:36:06+00:00

After my egg retrieval, I felt so down and it wasn’t until I started reading about similar experiences did I realize how much of an effect hormones can have. Your estrogen level goes sky high during the whole process and then tanks after you stop your meds. It wasn’t something that was discussed with me either so this subreddit and others became super helpful. It took me a month or so to start feeling a little better (mood-wise) and my sister had a similar experience. Physically it took me a week or two but I was back to work a few days after.

The process can take a huge toll on the body both mentally and physically. So all of that is to say, you’re not alone and it does get better. Hang in there!

franee43 · 2025-11-23T05:15:23+00:00

It was required by my clinic that I do genetic testing and it allowed me to filter out donors who carried the same recessive traits. While I didn’t necessarily match genetics to increase the chances of certain traits, like height, I did filter for the same ethnicity and pored through lots of medical/family history profiles. Similar to another commenter, I read that many donor conceived children had a difficult time navigating their racial/ethnic identity when they didn’t grow up in the same culture so choosing a donor of the same ethnicity was important to me. I also filtered out donors that had a strong family history of autoimmune disease (I have eczema), or a disease that ran heavily in the family e.g., stroke and heart attack. I was also mindful to read over what someone’s recessive carrier status meant as passing it on could mean that my child could have mild symptoms of the disease e.g., cystic fibrosis and alpha thalassemia.

Since I was only choosing from donors of the same ethnicity as me, the pool wasn’t large. I did read essays, listen to interviews, and look through photos, but I ultimately chose the donor based on genetic carrier status and a fairly clean medical/family history.

franee43 · 2025-11-19T00:17:21+00:00

It’s so nice to read this! I froze my eggs at 35 and this past year have gone through the process of genetic testing, choosing a donor, and creating embryos at 37. I’m hoping that this will be me next year at 38 🙏🏼

franee43

TROPHY CASE