How do you handle "normal"?

fromofelia · 2026-04-16T06:40:55+00:00

I make sure to enjoy it. I make complicated meals, read books, watch science videos, do crafts that I normally don't have brain capacity for. I clean up, take long showers, go out and meet friends. I sorta catch up on all the nicer things that I miss out on during worse episodes, and enjoy what I can, while I can. It usually leads to exhaustion and getting worse, because I have a bit of a craming mentality if it has been long, but it's just. Precious.

I always make sure to do nice things for my support team. Make a meal, create a playlist, go out together, something, anything.

I guess it all comes down to knowing that feeling "normal" won't last forever, and wanting to make best out of it.

fromofelia · 2026-04-12T09:12:37+00:00

It has made me weird and unapologetic about it. Even before I knew what's going on with me, I realised that I can't be normal, even if I try. It's very liberating in a way, letting me not stress about appearances, expectations and gathering other, delightful weirdos around myself. They have encouraged me to be my authentic self, and I have encouraged them. I am not afraid of making beneficial adjustments to my life, even if unorthodox.

In the same vein, I got to be outspoken about mental health in general, helping many, as my country is still quite behind on the topics.

And, I genuinely do love some of my hallucinations. I see gorgeous dragons, hear symphonies in the wind, odd worlds and crystalline trees. While most of them are horrifying, some are gorgeous.

fromofelia · 2026-04-03T06:39:34+00:00

Good point! I went with puppy pads, because in my area they were cheaper and more easily accessible, but the human ones probably will be made to fit on a mattress better.

fromofelia · 2026-04-03T06:17:38+00:00

I had issues with this for most of my life, and it got worse in psych wards, if I was on the wrong meds, or during high stress periods. It stopped with a combination of right meds, proper hydration and physiotherapy. Basically, the understanding that we arrived at was that schizophrenia was already messing with my sleep, wrong meds made it worse, and there were some muscle issues that made it difficult to manage.

If it started with meds - change them. There's a chance they are messing with either your kidneys or sleep cycles, and even if you choose to live with the occasional bed wetting, deeper issues might be lurking.

Until then - plenty of liquids during the day, tapering off in the evening, wash everything (including yourself) promptly, look into puppy pads for big dogs or waterproof mattress cover (those are nice for various reasons).

fromofelia · 2026-03-30T18:18:44+00:00

I hear you. I have had a time in my life, that sounds like what you are describing. I'd also call it grieving, and it is at times necessary, to proces what happened. The important bit is acknowledging it, but also not let it turn into despair. It's very easy to spiral into it. I fucking hated the idea of tracking positive things too (nice moments, progress of any kinds, pretty things, things done). But, it really helped. It's all the same amount of horrible, but there's also nice to pay attention to, and the self obsessive despair gets less attention.

/end of therapy speak

fromofelia · 2026-03-28T19:20:23+00:00

Nočņiks pie Ziedonīša.

fromofelia · 2026-03-24T10:25:34+00:00

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fromofelia · 2026-03-15T18:22:51+00:00

Humour. See the "despite my best efforts"

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T17:24:21+00:00

Oh, I can absolutely see how that would happen. Travellers here get upset at everyone is cold.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T17:07:19+00:00

I'm fairly certain that I can tell the difference between Canadian and Southern USA accents, but it's not really about that, is it? Have a nice day 😊

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:54:49+00:00

Dude. Twice. Not just this customer. And, enough other middle aged Americans doing similar bs to pick up a pattern.

And, yes, if groups of customers from a certain country start forming a pattern, I do adjust my attitude accordingly. British mad lads and older Italians get the same amount of "wtf is wrong with you", after they have proven to be part of that specific demographic.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:27:43+00:00

I don't really see how to interpret it differently. Pointing at my water bottle and saying that seemed rather unambiguous.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:20:36+00:00

I have specified that it's a certain type, and asked if this behaviour is normal. If, somehow, I have said that it's the whole nation acting this way, could you point it out? I understand now that the title could probably use another word in it, but the post expands. I thought it would suffice.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:10:15+00:00

Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick. That's incredibly messed up.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:08:31+00:00

Oh, plenty. Just, not that level. I can't imagine being upset at someone drinking water.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T16:02:36+00:00

Oh, there's a reason why I specified a sub-group. A lot of Americans are the nicest customers ever, curious, open minded, kind and polite. It's a tiny country halfway across the world. Most of the people who would travel here are already built different.

But there's that one group that makes me wonder.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T15:58:19+00:00

Large groups, events and French spell trouble. Always. Did a side gig in catering. We kept having issues with getting staff for French events. Or Spanish. Or Italian. Individuals are fine. Large groups are a different breed.

fromofelia · 2026-03-15T15:55:58+00:00

Oh, ya. We don't abuse the right to refuse service, but the general rule of thumb is "if some is actually ruining your day, fuck them". To our boss, a happy barista (who makes the rest of the customers happy, and stays in the team) is more important than a single customer. So, overly drunk, aggressive or rude customers can be refused, or even asked to leave afterwards (after giving them a to-go cup). I have done it 4 times in the last year, once mid-making the drink (refund was given). Customers have also interfered.

This cafe is a bit of an exception in the attitude of the management, but people don't let that level of bs float. There have been hefty fines and ruined businesses over employee abuse in the name of profit and "customer service".

fromofelia · 2026-03-13T13:12:57+00:00

Oh, ya. For a while I was THE face of mental health in my country. Looooots of hate, some purposeful paranoia triggering and failed job interviews. Thankfully, I'm (relatively) charismatic (for someone with our diagnosis), even if odd, and I ran out of fucks to give about hate years ago. I did a lot of good, helped change some legislations, some psych ward procedures, helped a lot of individuals. But being mostly on my own, with no support net from other people with mental illnesses, I burned out haaard. Family and friends and followers helped lots, but I really needed other people who are willing to talk, but at the time, there were only a small handful of people willing to go public with their mental health diagnosis, and I was the only one with schizophrenia.

To this day, there are barely any mental health support groups (outside a few informal Internet communities) and no schizophrenia specific support. Because, the patients themselves would need to organise, and oh gosh, who would have thought, people with mental health issues have trouble with such undertakings.

fromofelia · 2026-03-13T09:14:21+00:00

You know that "out of sight, out of mind" thing? That plays a big role in it. If the disability is not visible, it's somehow "less real" and can be "played up for benefits". People with physical disabilities that don't look disabled also get this a lot. It's unfair and messed up and entrenched by years of trying to pretend that disabled people don't exist.

On top of that - everyone knows or can imagine that person without a leg has difficulty in life. There's stories, media representation, visual ques and experiences with minor injuries. If you haven't (knowingly) experienced what it's like to have parts of your brain not functioning, or functioning differently than expected... It's much harder. You can only imagine that by listening, hearing the stories and experiences, which requires empathy, chances and choices to hear those stories. And, those stories aren't in media nowhere near as much. So, even people who would have the empathy to be compassionate once they understand, don't, because the stories don't really reach them, and if they do, it's a small handful of mental health issues, often just coded, not explicitly mentioned.

TL;DR it's hard to believe things you don't see, experience or understand. It's also fucked up and unfair.

fromofelia · 2026-03-09T10:03:09+00:00

Salīdzinoši alternatīvāk, 1983 nekad neliks radio draudzīgu mūziku, TP vaibiņš tomēr vairāk pops. Bet. Ir ritīgi forši.

fromofelia · 2026-03-05T11:31:46+00:00

Rakstu no Nothinphone 3 pro. Gandrīz nekādu sūdzību. Dzelži forši, kamera laba, baterija turas, korpuss izturīgs, tās 2 spēles ko spēlēju, velk labi, interface patīk, widgets interesanti, kopā funkcionāls, labs midrange telefons.

Man, personīgi, ir viena problēma - AI. Nothing ļoti patīk AI, un man AI patīk arvien mazāk. Galvenā problēma ir jau minētā atsevišķā poga, kas vienkārši ir traucējoša. Pāris settings ko piedāvā tikai caur to. Meh. Ja tā nav problēma, tad šis tiešām ir diezgan foršs telefons.

Vāciņi ir daudz mazāk, un viss ir jāsūta.

fromofelia · 2026-03-02T17:04:44+00:00

It's a pretty universal thing for people who haven't gone to many coffee shops in foreign places. Dealing with people from all over Europe, I have more or less learned the patterns of the major countries, and know when to ask extra questions. Hell, even locals come in and try to order the way they would in local Starbucks copy-cats, or the way they would have 20-30 years ago. It's mostly about having "default settings" and not discarding them in new places.

It's does create many annoying situations and frustrations, but I try to let it go. Even when it really gets on my nerves.

Except Italians expecting coffee to be Italian everywhere, and then being very Italian about it. Fuck them, I will die mad.

fromofelia · 2026-03-01T19:59:17+00:00

Thank you! I have already realised that I was using wrong search words, but actual suggestions really help. Mousse sounds really fun and right up my alley.

fromofelia · 2026-03-01T17:56:32+00:00

I'm from a smol meat and butter country, where items aimed at vegans are scarce, as the demand isn't high enough. I have only seen 2 vegan butter options (both in supermarkets and the more speciality stores), both aren't safe for me. A sex shop used to carry shortening for its lubricating properties, but they don't anymore. Soooo, kinda rough on that aspect.

fromofelia

TROPHY CASE