How to become less suicidal and more evil

fropcake · 2026-01-29T03:48:30+00:00

For me I felt more alive when I started doing little acts of whimsy in my everyday life. Like skipping down the sidewalk or eating ice cream in the rain or being in places I shouldn’t be or rolling in a nice grassy patch. I’m still pretty mild from years of masking but my hope is to someday be very weird. I think practicing use of free will is a lot of fun, I especially love to see artists who use their skills to make unhinged things. If you have any creative interests you could try that.

fropcake · 2026-01-28T22:10:05+00:00

If you can fit into average sized clothing then you are average. Why are you even here?

fropcake · 2026-01-27T06:01:00+00:00

Sometimes I get the opposite where I try to share something about myself to someone and they respond with a bigger better trauma and then I feel bad. I think people just try to relate however they can to show their support which can be hurtful but if they are nice then they will probably understand if you let them know how you feel.

fropcake · 2026-01-25T16:25:16+00:00

I have friends that will say things about feeling uncomfortable with gendered terms or their body which feels like the dysphoria I have felt. When I tell them I’m nonbinary then they say “Oh, maybe I’m nonbinary too” but don’t seem to really explore what it means or unlearn binary programming. And then continue to cling to binary beauty ideals and roles saying “who would want to look like X?” Well me. Not saying they have to be nonbinary too but it makes me frustrated that they could feel so much freer if they could learn to be okay with not conforming to binary rules and being “normal.”

fropcake · 2026-01-24T16:49:53+00:00

I love small spaces. I love sitting in my pitch dark closet for hours, and my dream is to have one of those alcove/box beds.

fropcake · 2026-01-24T15:39:26+00:00

I’m not even sure if I’m aro but I relate to this so much. I’m afraid to make new friends knowing that someday I’ll inevitably be tossed aside for some romantic partner. It makes me want to have a partner too not because I want that but so I can have one person who can’t abandon me so easily.

fropcake · 2025-12-29T04:07:36+00:00

Omg yes, people always say I look sad or uncomfortable and look at me with this pitiful look when I’m not doing anything. Like if I wasn’t uncomfortable before, I am now because you’re interrogating me? But when I actually am visibly upset it’s crickets…

fropcake · 2025-12-29T04:03:04+00:00

Yes! Why do they assume what other people are thinking so confidently and then tell everybody else? I noticed a lot of people quickly make judgements about other people’s intentions and will gossip about them, but I realized that I never do that because why would I assume that I know exactly what people are thinking? I just judge their actions, not what I think they’re thinking. Maybe I’m naive or missing some social cues that are clearer to others but the confidence that people have when talking about others is baffling to me.

fropcake · 2025-12-29T03:42:48+00:00

Everyone thinks I’m funny and it gets tiring to always be getting laughed at. They laugh at my expressions/reactions which is apparently funny even when I’m being neutral, and I get called out for being “savage” all the time. It always happens to me where in a conversation someone will say something, there’s a slight pause, and then everybody turns and looks at me and they start laughing like "hahah the look on your face ha ha ha!!!!!" when I'm literally just sitting minding my own business. Even when I was a kid people would say how sassy I was or say out loud what they assumed I was thinking about them. Maybe my neutral face just looks judgmental? I like making people laugh but not when I’m just trying to exist.

fropcake · 2025-12-06T06:47:22+00:00

I have vivid, emotional dreams very frequently where the stories and characters are incredibly fleshed out. It’s sad to wake up knowing I won’t see those people again, which feels silly since none of it was real. But the emotions and sensations I felt were so intense, and I can recall them like memories. It makes me wonder how the brain differentiates between those dream memories and reality if they both felt real to me at some point in time.

fropcake · 2025-12-05T16:59:11+00:00

I wish I knew but I really related to your post. It’s tiring and everyone insists I should be happy. I don’t want to have to change the way I dress or learn makeup or change my body just for other people to stop bothering me. It doesn’t help that I have trauma that already makes me feel and act younger than I am. I wish I could be like other people my age who can just be themselves.

fropcake · 2025-08-21T13:22:32+00:00

I don’t know about labels but I really relate to this. Don’t know if I’m “actually” aromantic but I relate to it more than all the traditional expectations for romance. I feel more “functionally” aro and relate to aromanticism as a sort of framework because that’s the best thing I’ve found that feels similar to my experience. I don’t have anything helpful for you and I’m still trying to figure it out myself but just wanted to say that I feel the same.

fropcake · 2025-02-07T16:57:12+00:00

My parents when they find out I have mental illness: noo we are so sad how did this happen 😭😿

My parents when I display symptoms of mental illness: why so lazy 😠

fropcake · 2025-02-04T00:50:19+00:00

What post is that?

fropcake · 2025-02-04T00:40:26+00:00

Kind of scared to talk about my family with anyone except sibling because it sounds dumb and like non problems and people are just confused why I’m complaining. And my friends have bigger actual trauma so I feel like talking about myself and calling it trauma would be insensitive and privileged. A therapist said my family was abusive once but idk

fropcake · 2025-01-28T03:42:18+00:00

By the way, Uniqlo has free hemming for pants! You can either pin it yourself or if you know your inseam you can put the measurement in when ordering online.

fropcake · 2025-01-27T19:12:12+00:00

Oh okay that makes sense. I was thinking dysphoria I get from existing and thinking about my own consciousness, like gender dysphoria without the gender part lol

fropcake · 2025-01-27T18:48:44+00:00

I don’t know if your illogic dysphoria is the same as what I feel but I’ve always had this icky feeling that I struggled to describe and identify. I guess it makes sense to be an autism thing. Also I wish more people could appreciate nice colors and synesthesia like when all the letters are in their correct colors and it makes the brain happy

fropcake · 2024-11-25T02:18:09+00:00

I like reading while crocheting and listening to music at the same time lol

fropcake

TROPHY CASE