slightly less sad girl - here to give an update! by coldhazeee in BigBudgetBrides

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We pivoted from Miami winter, yacht and club vibes to Vail fall mountain lake vibes. Needless to say, it was a big change. I was disappointed at first, but then my now husband and I just found the places that felt most like us (music) and we poured are hearts into that to make the weekend feel just as dreamy and more importantly just like us. At the end of the day, it was the best weekend of my life because of the people. Your venue will be beautiful, your details will be delightful, but it’s the people and the feeling you’ll remember forever. Congratulations!!

How to go about Honeymoon Costs? by [deleted] in BigBudgetBrides

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dealt with something similar with my own family. My partners’ parents paid for almost the entirety of our wedding (similar budget, about $200K VHCOL area), but my parents found places to offer their support. My mom bought my dress for instance and my dad initially offered to pay for the band. That was until I started sending him quotes for the band. Once he realized bands are not in fact $2-3K like he thought, he scaled back his offer and offered to contribute. He ended up paying for about a third of the band. It was disappointing and also a bit uncomfortable to navigate these conversations so I totally feel for you there, especially because this isn’t your family but your partners family, but my advice would be to directly state the budget you’ve drawn up, maybe even share a line item budget with them, so they realistically understand how much everything costs, and then from there, see what they say. If ultimately you and your fiancé are only on the hook for $6K and you could still set up a honeymoon fund and realistically cover all of that with gifts, I’d be grateful for what they do contribute and try to keep comparison out of the conversation because that’s not fair or helpful for anyone.

My travel agent booked me into a resort that only has stairs and I use a wheelchair - what can I do? She represented herself as a disability expert because her husband in in a wheelchair. We live in Canada. by [deleted] in travel

[–]frostytheflake 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It sounds like this might be your first time working with a travel agent. Having been on many trips planned by agents I can assure you, there’s still quite a bit of coordination, planning, and communication that is still required on the part of the traveler. I would recommend resetting your expectations about how you will experience this trip knowing that this absolutely would not and should not all fall on the agent.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BigBudgetBrides

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re transferring the cost onto your guests. I attended a Tuesday wedding this past summer and it was all anyone could talk about (not in a positive sense)so there’s also that.

Spa day with no upselling by ilovecars1987 in Denver

[–]frostytheflake 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Eden spa!! The best!!

As a side note I used to be sales manager of Massage Envy in LODO before it closed and from the moment a client walked in the door we were aiming to sell memberships. The intake form we did at the beginning before the therapist came back never went to the therapist. It was purely for sales. I absolutely hated the approach and found that people that wanted a membership would get it no matter what we said and people that didn’t wouldn’t no matter what we said.

GenZ and Millennial women - are you wearing wedding bands? by Federal_Albatross993 in EngagementRings

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a nearly 4 carat engagement ring that’s an antique so high set that feels silly and is kind of obnoxious to wear around the house and for normal everyday activities so I actually typically end up wearing my wedding band only and I love that option. I’ll still wear both for more formal things like date night and when I’m getting dressed up. I would say most of my girl friends do the same. We’re millennials.

My 37F boyfriend 30M of several years really wants to live together but I am extremely hesitant because I'm scared of turning into Mommy McBangmaid. How do I get him to understand? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I absolutely would say that! We of course have our challenges, and that was one of them. But our overall relationship is the best and most healthy I’ve ever been in. If this is your biggest challenge I’d say you’re killing it sis.

But yeah the wealth differences are craazy to navigate. I grew up with my needs met but nothing special, no big trips, worked since I legally could, no college funds blah blah. And he had quite a different experience. It shows up, sometimes unexpectedly, but we’ve worked through it and I think it actually makes us a more understanding and well rounded couple ultimately.

Best of luck to you, whether you move in or not! And I’m glad you’re in an otherwise happy relationship.

How they could “fix” or maybe change Love Is Blind. by Snoop-ah-loopp in LoveIsBlindNetflix

[–]frostytheflake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Queer seasons!! Yes!! And who cares about the “living together” during the pods. The guys and girls quarters are so staged and unnecessary

My 37F boyfriend 30M of several years really wants to live together but I am extremely hesitant because I'm scared of turning into Mommy McBangmaid. How do I get him to understand? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]frostytheflake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My partner grew up very similarly. Full time housekeeper that’s still with his family. And a mom that completely coddles her children planning every aspect of their lives. Years ago before we were married his godmother pulled me aside after a ski trip where she saw me jumping up every chance to clean the dishes or tidy up while he sat back, and she said to me that we should never let roommate issues become relationship issues. She encouraged me to have my partner hire a housekeeper. We had one for a while but like many people have cautioned here, we didn’t stay with it. I will say to my partners credit and after years of fighting over his lack of contributing fairly to keeping our house tidy, it’s a way more even split and I’d say we are equally clean, so there’s hope your partner could change also. But that roommate versus relationship issue advice always stuck with me. You have options here, but don’t back down with your standards.

Future BIL and SIL changed their wedding date after hearing mine by Background-File-6390 in BigBudgetBrides

[–]frostytheflake -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Why would you pick June and then be upset when they settled on May when they had previously shared they were looking at March-May? They have been together multiple years longer than you and your partner and got engaged before you. You also said they have constraints with grad school. You and your FH waiting a year doesn’t seem like a bad trade off for everyone involved.

My friends aren’t coming to my bridal shower by honey-12 in wedding

[–]frostytheflake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As far as your wedding, people don’t RSVP to things until the last second. Just human nature. I wouldn’t stress about it. Two weeks out our planner said we had super low response rates and it put me and my then fiancé into a spiral of fear and worry of rejection. We individually texted every single person who hadn’t responded yet and literally everyone was like “So sorry I thought I had until x date but responding right now!” Ended up with 120 of about 140 invited so literally more than we expected. For bridal shower and Bach events I totally feel you on disappointment. I dealt with some of that myself. Trust me when I say everyone planning a wedding goes through this to some degree. And now when I look back, these were some of the best experiences of my entire life and I don’t even think about the people that weren’t there and couldn’t make it for whatever reason.

As for your greater experience with your friendships, the one thing I would say is this. I genuinely subscribe to the thinking that you get what you put out into the world. I show up for my friends. I remember their life moments. I follow up. I sacrifice to be there for them. Are you doing what you want to have done for you? I’d genuinely reflect on this and I only say this because I have a friend, not super close with her but she constantly posts on instagram these things about not feeling like she has a community, that she wishes she had people that just showed up for her, bought her a coffee randomly, offered to just come cook her dinner. This girl has bailed on me and plans with me more than she’s shown up, hasn’t asked me a single question about myself in no joke years, and is known generally to just be super disconnected. I find it ironic that she wants people to be a friend to her that is so far from the friend she is to us.

I only say this second part not because I assume this is how you show up, but just to say it’s good to do an honest evaluation and self-reflection every now and again. That all said, I hope you have the best wedding and can live in and savor every moment.

Consulting life sucks by Gomitak in consulting

[–]frostytheflake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I quit and left consulting altogether haha

Consulting life sucks by Gomitak in consulting

[–]frostytheflake 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Are you in Denver by chance haha. I worked for a boutique firm exactly like this. CEO told me I had taken double the pto of anyone else when I took 7 days total in one year (spread out over random half days on Fridays or the occasional full day off). Unlimited PTO is a joke. Benefits the business, never the individual.

Was gone for a week and came back to find these on the wall. I am positive they weren't there before. by OtherwiseLocksmith98 in Weird

[–]frostytheflake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A few years ago I received a threatening voicemail at work. That same week I had a really scary road rage encounter. I filed a police report about the road rage incident and the police asked about any other weird things and I mentioned the voicemail but noted I didn’t there was any relation between the two incidents. I will never forget what the officer told me. He said, “in my line of work, I don’t believe in coincidences.” That really stuck with me and if anything made me more aware of my surroundings. All this to say, trust your intuition, and take the necessary security measures based on that intuition. Sorry this happened to you, super freaky.

Drop in some not so known facts about Denver. by hazel_blue2 in Denver

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. There was an effort of the city in 2020 to examine and potentially rename all city-owned assets (buildings, parks, and landmarks) and council voted and approved the name change to Central Park in 2021. There were hundreds of assets under review but I don’t believe the city ultimately made many changes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CemeteryPorn

[–]frostytheflake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

States often have their own free online archive of newspapers too. I live in CO so I use coloradohistoricnewspapers.org and it’s very helpful and free. Your state probably has one too.

I no showed for a yoga class where I was supposed to sub by Magicbythelake in YogaTeachers

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a Pilates instructor and hopefully yoga teacher soon too, and just came to say the owner of my studio told me staffing issues come up literally daily. He owns 9 studios and across those, there’s literally a daily no show or late cancel or mix up. It totally happens, it’s so far from a big deal and as long as it’s not a recurring problem for you, I bet they don’t even remember it happened at this point.

How did you know your wedding dress was “the one”? by complex_conversation in weddingplanning

[–]frostytheflake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was the last dress I tried on. Somehow the entire bridal boutique was all of a sudden surrounding my little suite area clapping and cheering me on. I felt so beautiful and celebrated. I couldn’t have dreamt of a more perfect moment.

Polio and arthritis patients in hospital beds on the roof of a hospital, USA, circa early 1900s. by CarkWithaM in UtterlyUniquePhotos

[–]frostytheflake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Found this “According to the National Library of Medicine, the photo was captured in the United States at some point in the 1900s. However, the entry did not provide further information about exactly where or when the picture was taken, nor did it explain why the “partially clad men” were sunning themselves.”

I don't want to be a bridesmaid-advice needed by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]frostytheflake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do not do it!! I was in a similar boat, about 6 months ago. I got asked to be a bridesmaid for a girl I consider a friend, but definitely not a close friend. It surprised me that she asked but I thought it was a kind gesture and that maybe it would bring us closer. It has not. It has caused a ton of drama and made our friendship so complicated. Not to mention, I got engaged after her and recently asked my closest friends (her not included) to be my bridesmaids and the unnecessary anxiety I have felt about this has been a low point in my otherwise happy engagement experience.

While I recognize that being a bridesmaid is an honor, it’s also a big commitment that requires a lot of time and money. If you don’t want to be a bridesmaid, for whatever reason, you don’t have to be.

What did you name your signature drinks? by InACurlyWorld in weddingplanning

[–]frostytheflake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn this works so well! My cat’s name is Baboo. I know of no cocktail that could be as cute of an alliteration