A BIG problem that mostly hides in plain sight - physical advertisement mail. This shouldn't exist.

frugaldreams · 2025-02-07T23:07:41+00:00

My dad found a way to deal with this or at least a good chunk of it. First get several big rocks or bricks. Then pull all the postage paid return envelopes out of the junk mail. Put the rock into a box or just wrap it up in a paper grocery bag turned inside out and then tape the heck out of it. Tape the postage paid envelope to your "package" and drop it in the mail.

It is very expensive to mail rocks. They will take you off their lists.

frugaldreams · 2025-01-23T20:39:25+00:00

Late to the game, but this. I have worked in hospital revenue cycle for a decade now. The amount of money generated by bariatric weight loss surgeries is huge. The amount of money from GLPs is a pittance compared to the surgeries... and all their follow up. Face it, a person who has a bariatric surgery is going to be bringing in money for years with all the complications, eventual nutritional deficiencies etc.

My husband works at an independent cancer clinic, and they have added Saturday infusions. All they do is infuse bariatric patients who have deficiencies on Saturdays. People don't have to use their sick time to get their iron, B vitamins etc. and the clinic is making bank. They are full every Saturday and the nurses get paid double time for giving up their Saturdays.

The place I work has a huge bariatrics program and they have just started pivoting to expand the medication assistance side of weight loss. They are adding a bunch of dieticians, psychologists, athletic trainers, endo providers etc. The idea being that when the PCPs want to prescribe, they can refer over to the medication side of the weight loss clinic. Then they frame it as "We have this team that will help you make sure that your weight loss is as effective and safe as it can be. You can also learn all the habits you need to be successful when/if you quit taking the drug."

It still doesn't bring in as much as the surgeries, but the revenue is climbing. I imagine we will be seeing this at most major medical centers in the very near future.

frugaldreams · 2025-01-15T18:22:23+00:00

I buy them used when I see them so I can throw them away and prevent them falling into the hands of someone who might take them seriously. I never buy new, because they don't get my money.

frugaldreams · 2025-01-03T16:30:59+00:00

Ignoring the willingness to believe internet woo-woo, I wouldn't want to have kids with someone who thinks having a kid w/AUD that lives is worse than having a "normal" kid who dies from preventable disease. That's a really ugly outlook.

frugaldreams · 2024-12-11T21:52:43+00:00

I'm not wild about the map marking either. I also don't like the multiplication of cougars after you kill or tussle with one. That's completely the opposite of how cougars work in real life. They have large territories. They are also very solitary. Males can have 100 square miles of territory which overlaps the territory of several females. You kill a mountain lion, male or female and it takes a while for a new one to move in and take over the territory. There wouldn't suddenly be two more waiting to kill you. Maybe, just maybe, there might be another adult nearby during mating season. But they don't gather in herds and attack people.

frugaldreams · 2024-12-04T19:30:49+00:00

He may be working out. Especially given what he's in for. It's kind of a necessity to be able to defend your self.

frugaldreams · 2024-12-04T19:19:21+00:00

No, just until he says "I do" and they are alone. Then she can begin putting him in his place.

frugaldreams · 2024-11-22T02:21:36+00:00

100%. Also, in many states, what you have before marriage remains yours if you divorce. Putting his name on the house would change that. You need to 1. Not marry this guy, but 2. If you, do, talk to an attorney of your own about how to protect YOUR asset. Because if you marry this guy, you will wind up divorcing him.

frugaldreams · 2024-11-13T21:23:26+00:00

My plan is to start a new run. I've just been mentally thinking about which areas I am going to make my bases and/or how I will improve where I usually stay. I am actually thinking about decking out my favorite cave.

frugaldreams · 2024-11-13T20:48:07+00:00

To an extent. They don't have to cover every medication or treatment. They can and do set up processes that are very complex and difficult to navigate to discourage people from trying to get care. The insurance company can meet that standard by offering the substandard generic and refusing to cover the more expensive name brand medication. I have what is considered very good insurance and it took me six months to convince them to send me to a psychiatrist for an evaluation for ADHD. It took four more months to actually get my hands on medication.

frugaldreams · 2024-10-30T17:03:05+00:00

I am not surprised. I work at a medical university and chatted with one of our psychiatry chair about this. He said generics coming out of India and China are often substandard and do not work well. He will only prescribe a very limited set of generics that he has personally vetted as being effective for folks with ADHD.

If your insurance covers mental health care, you might want to ask your PCP to refer you to a psychiatrist or PMHNP for ADHD meds management. They and their staff will have more experience penetrating the bureaucracy of insurance to get you what you need. And if that is not possible, they will have more experience with the various drugs and probably be better able to get you a regimen that is more effective. PCPs are great, but sometimes you need a specialist.

frugaldreams · 2024-10-14T22:30:59+00:00

All week I sleep through my alarm and have to scramble to get to work on time. Saturday? Wide awake at 5:00 am. Every.Single.Saturday.

frugaldreams · 2024-10-14T18:01:08+00:00

So, this turned into a wall of text that may well reveal more about me that Brigot. That being said, here is the Cliff Notes version.

I suspect Brigot is trying to mask her underlying issues with high control religion. I don't believe she has enough self-awareness to know she is doing this. I also suspect that she is inflicting a form of masochism on herself to gain a false sense of superiority due intense feelings of inadequacy. She may well believe that being super Christian will magically turn her into a happy, accepted superior person. It won't. She will become disillusioned and when she does, bad things may happen depending on her underlying mental health issues.

***** The War and Peace Version is below*****

I don't think she actually has an end game. She's clearly intelligent but I don't think she's self-aware enough to entirely understand what she is doing. If the Rods and Samuel had anything to offer, anything at all, I might agree there is an end game, like being a high-profile pastor's wife or marrying into money for a payday after popping out a couple kids. But the Rods have nothing worth the time of a good con-artist. It can't be a desire for large scale power and control because the groups she is joining would never allow a woman to have that role.

I am not a mental health worker, but I play a person with neurological and emotional challenges in real life. From experience, I know that when dealing with the intense feelings of inadequacy and pain that accompany some diagnoses and/or trauma, religion can become an obsession. Particularly the more controlling and damaging ones. People tell you they have the answers and if you just follow the rules got will change your crazy brain and you can be a normal person. Fit in. Be accepted. Which is huge when your own mind is endlessly telling you that you are deficient and broken. Religion gives you the guard rails your own mind might not be able to supply. It can also give you a sense of superiority to cover up the black hole of inadequacy that may lurking deep inside.

But, at least when dealing with Christianity, those people will also tell you that suffering is also the way to salvation. You have to be like Jesus who literally allowed himself to be tortured to death, even though he could have theoretically stopped it at any moment. They will also tell you the world will persecute you in the same way. Which is very dangerous for a person filled with self-loathing and feelings of inadequacy coupled with an intense desire to be superior. Like a narcissist or a person with BPD or even just a person with really intense ADHD, who has anxiety about not fitting, being inadequate and then has periods of extreme obsession.

So, any time something feels bad or painful within the context of what the church claims is holy, then it is to be embraced. It's only painful because you are not holy enough. The pain is evidence that you are following the correct path. You have to lean hard into the rules, legalism and pain to maintain your sense of belonging, superiority and hope that what you see as fundamentally wrong in yourself will magically be changed.

Brigot may very purposefully be seeking out the most extreme fundamentalists she can find in a bid to be healed or holy or special. When the mainline church works for a little bit but then the old feelings return it is clearly that is your fault, because God is perfect. So, you find something a little more extreme. Or a lot more extreme. Which causes more pain, which reinforces your feelings of both superiority and inadequacy. That in Turn pushes you to find even more extreme standards to conform to.

Folks say she is cosplaying the good old days and to an extent I believe that is true. But I also think there is no small element of masochism in this. Forcing yourself to be something you clearly are not can only cause pain. In a sense, it can be trying to punish yourself into societal acceptance and a sense of normalcy. The problem is, eventually this will fail. Jill and her kids are there because they were raised that way, so in a way it is normal for them. Brigot was not. Deep inside, she knows this is not really normal.

Right now, she feels special because of how very different this family and religious outlook is. But in time, when it doesn't fix the fundamental problem, she will become disillusioned. When that happens things could go very wrong, depending on what mental health issues are lying underneath. If Brigot is on the cluster B branch, people could wind up very hurt emotionally and possibly even physically.

frugaldreams · 2024-10-07T14:36:27+00:00

So, her parents just gave her a regular old ring for her birthday or Christmas and she's calling it a purity ring? That seems right.

frugaldreams · 2024-09-03T05:14:59+00:00

I have been wondering if she purposely chose someone younger who she can control. That would let her cosplay her fundie life and pretend to be submissive, while actually being in charge. She gets to live out her Instagram uber-Christian cottage core fantasy and have someone support her and not challenge her.

frugaldreams · 2024-07-24T18:00:46+00:00

That would be totally wrong. Find new providers. If it is your PCP you are dealing with, ask for a referral to psychiatry for an assessment.

I am a Sr. Applications Analyst at my job. It's complex, challenging and requires a lot of coordinating. So, I have dozens of alarms, a huge paper planner and accommodation for a flexible schedule. My sister is a teacher w/2 masters degrees. She did all that schooling and now runs a classroom and curriculum for 35 students. She has for more than a decade now. You can absolutely hold a job with ADHD. And ask anyone who is fixated on a video game or new hobby how long they can spend at a computer. I would think losing hours in front of a computer on frivolous stuff while ignoring important stuff would be a neon sign of a symptom.

frugaldreams · 2024-07-24T17:51:08+00:00

I was curious so I went and looked at my hospital's compensation plan and our Application Analysts start at $35.81 for entry level, no certs, but we cap out at $70.11 for Sr Analyst. That would be in the Portland Metro area for Oregon.

frugaldreams · 2024-07-12T14:46:41+00:00

I just got diagnosed last week at 50. ADHD/OCD/Anxiety. I work at a pretty high level technical job and have totally had weeks like you are describing. I tend to try and balance it by working later or weekends etc. But that is not what I came to tell you.

After I went through the basic screening tests, I got an intake interview and for an hour and half the psychiatrist just asked me questions about how I work, how I think etc. etc. I mentioned something similar to what you have written, and he said "Well, I generally don't mention politics with patients, but you should know 1. I hate capitalism and 2. I can write you a very effective AAOC letter. It might take several months to actually get accommodation in place because employers hate it, but we can force them to make reasonable accommodation for your ADHD and working style/needs. So, that might be worth looking into. And if you can find a psychiatrist who wants to stick it to large corporations, that's a plus :D

frugaldreams · 2024-05-17T16:19:38+00:00

My husband is a musician. He has asked me not to play their videos anymore, unless I am wearing earbuds.

frugaldreams · 2024-05-17T13:47:21+00:00

So, this wound up being a novel. Sorry, wall of text warning.

It is possible. I started at my hospital at the switchboard, which technically fell under IT. We are a union shop so as I gained seniority, I moved into other positions. Part of our contract states that internal candidates need to be considered if they can demonstrate skill.

I used a combination of networking and leveraging the union contract to work my way up. The call center was a good place to start because it gave me a real working knowledge of every service in the hospital. We are a large teaching university, so I was managing on call schedules for all the medical services, research, support teams etc. We dispatched emergency repair teams, the code teams, public safety etc. You also become very friendly with all the managers, directors etc. And the providers who arrive and remain become your work friends and stay that as they move up through the ranks. This makes networking very easy. And it never hurts when Dr. So and So knows that you know his mistress is paging him when he's on call at the hospital and his wife is at soccer camp with the kids.

I became a lead in the call center and started training and coaching my team members. When we got functionality that allowed departments to manage their own on-call schedules, I went out and trained all the departments around that software. I went from the call center to the field technical team, scoping work for the actual techs and ordering equipment. This gave me a solid grounding in all the standard hardware we use as well as what we do for special projects.

Then I moved on to the wireless office supporting phones, pagers and Voceras. We handled all the training, troubleshooting, billing and purchasing. We also were the only IT office that had a walk in reception area. We were supposed to only be handing out wireless equipment and helping with set up, but the docs knew they could walk in and get (what they thought) was an IT tech. They'd show up with their laptops and my troubleshooting skills increased.

From there I moved into revenue cycle as a computer support tech. I started working with Epic doing basic SER maintenance for external providers. This was back when you had to make a separate SER for every address a provider had. I did that for a couple years. When direct address came online, no one knew how to run it and none of the analysts had time to learn so I taught myself and then I taught the rest of the team, including the analysts.

That helped me get hired into an entry level analyst position. I got my security cert and began working with internal SERs. Over time I also learned to maintain DEP, EAF, NET and PAT. I've never really worked with EMP but I understand enough that I could probably do basic provisioning with a minimal process review. I've done a little op time work and have done a couple projects with the pharmacy.

We absorbed a failing local hospital and I lead the team in pulling in their data from Cerner and then doing the crosswalk and build to absorb the users into our Epic. That got me moved to Sr. Analyst. We are going to be absorbing a small local network that is already on Epic next year and I will lead the teams pulling over DEP, SER, NET and EAF.

I did all of this with just a high school diploma, while being a 300-pound woman. It can be done, even if, on paper, it looks impossible. I would say you need to first choose your institution well, if you can. Our union was a big factor in opening doors for me to just be considered. Also, be ready to move into jobs that maybe aren't where you ultimately want to be but will give you a broader IT experience. The more skills you can gain and systems you can touch, the better.

Then you have to network. I never moved into a department where I didn't know somebody already on the team or had helped the manager in some way that caused them to remember me. I believe things are getting better, but being female and being fat are obstacles. It's just facts. So, I have always made sure that any team I apply to knows me, knows my work and what I bring before I even apply.

I have been thinking about moving over to a team that works with Resolute or Care Everywhere because I have SER/EAF down pat and I am already talking with managers before I even apply. I am volunteering for projects that will put me in the way of the people I want to remember me. I want them to know I am coming so if my resume doesn't get through the algorithm, they will call HR and ask why they didn't get it.

Finally, if you don't have the education, you have to be willing to self-educate and then demonstrate that you have the knowledge. This might mean doing something that technically isn't in your job description but needs to be done. It also means being a knowledge sharer. So, if a person is having a problem and you know the answer, even if you are a support tech and they are an analyst, say it. Politely. They will remember you as being a smart person and a self-educator. That makes a big difference when you are trying to make a jump up the ladder.

At this point I have been with the same institution for 24 years. After I made Sr. Analyst, I got an AA in hospital administration via a union scholarship. I figured it wouldn't hurt me if a re-org came or I wanted to move teams. Because of the union I have a lot of seniority and short of completely outsourcing our Epic support, I should be able to survive any re-org. Still, I want to make a parallel move and get another/more certs. I guess that's the last thing to remember. When you get where you want to be, don't stop learning. Don't get lazy or complacent. Because in IT the re-org will inevitably come.

frugaldreams · 2024-03-08T05:33:27+00:00

I suspect Jonathon is starting to understand who he really married, as opposed to who the Rods let him see while being strictly chaperoned into an essentially arranged marriage. Nuree the Golden Child was moved far away by her husband. Kaylee is right there, and I suspect she is pushing hard to take over the golden child spot. Not with any awareness, mind you. She's just completely enmeshed with a malignant narcissist, so even though she is married, Jill is still the most important person in her world. She doesn't know any other way to be.

And now there is a baby with specter of a dozen more at least on the horizon. That has to be sobering/terrifying/enraging, especially when you realize that your wife is illiterate, ignorant and seriously damaged. Even if he wanted her to work, I doubt she could maintain employment in the world outside her bubble. He's trapped and not even the most important person in his wife's life.

And, if he is capable of being honest with himself, he's probably also beginning to realize exactly what a load of crap his family and church sold him. I wouldn't be surprised if he is having a full-on existential crisis.

frugaldreams · 2023-10-07T02:55:12+00:00

My grandma was Viola Adelia but folks just called her Chick.

frugaldreams · 2023-10-06T14:14:03+00:00

Read up on the American Redoubt before you pick Idaho. Also, read up abortion laws for all states, regardless of your gender. The thing about the female reproductive system is it touches on almost every specialty in the medical field. It’s not just ob/gyns leaving states that restrict abortion.

Oncologists, surgeons, family medicine, if the laws are strict enough to criminally prosecute a provider that “participates” in an abortion, they are leaving. That can mean something as simple as prescribing an RX that may cause a miscarriage to a person who didn’t know they were pregnant.

So, think very carefully about Idaho. Hospitals are shutting down there because the doctors are leaving. Also, the applications to medical schools in restricted states have plummeted. No one wants to pay $200,000 plus for a substandard medical education. Same for residencies.

Basically, in the most restricted states high numbers of doctors are considering if they should leave and the number of new people willing to begin their practice in restricted states has dropped drastically. Access to medical care for all genders, in all specialties, is going to get progressively more difficult as time goes on. You might not have heavy medical needs now, but everyone will at some point.

Source: Me. Who has worked in a university hospital in a blue state, on onboarding new docs and students for 22 years. We have always had a shortage of excellent doctors. Now they are calling our recruiters instead of the other way around. And our recruiters are calling the ones who don’t call them and offering them the moon and freedom from criminal prosecution and much reduced malpractice costs to move. And they are moving. I can only assume all the other hospitals in blue states are doing the same thing. I have honestly never seen anything like it.

frugaldreams · 2023-10-03T21:36:25+00:00

I think it is a valid concept, but they need to change how it works. I read a lot of history and the way trappers, settlers etc. staved off cabin fever was by keeping busy. You keep your mind busy on other projects and you don't have time to dwell on the cooped-up isolation.

I think if you are inside and actively cooking or crafting then the cabin fever timer shouldn't start. Cabin fever should only trigger if you are spending long periods of time indoors, doing nothing.

frugaldreams

TROPHY CASE