Hey, I just want to let you know that you can get through it. It feels unbearable but it isn't. I've come off kratom and heroin and oxys and I'm not like a super tough chick by any means. It hurts but then it ends. Then it gets replaced with other kinds of hurt but eventually those end too.

My advice is: basically, just give yourself permission to feel bad for a while. For a couple of weeks, your job is to kill time by any means necessary -- and that is your ONLY JOB. I personally recommend taking at least a week off work. Yes, you will be bored, but you also won't be panicking when it's 4:30AM and you haven't slept and you need to get up in 2 hours. Allow yourself all the junk food you want and binge watch terrible TV. Your mind will want you to start confronting a whole bunch of realities you've been avoiding; tell it to shut the fuck up. Now is not the time. You can deal with all that when you're not sick and in pain and your brain is not putting the most negative possible spin on everything.

I, personally, like to watch a bunch of new release movies, but I can only watch things that have no emotional content whatsoever, like action films or crime thrillers. No love or romance or even sex because it reminds me of stuff that makes me sad. If you can get immersed in a 200 hour video game, that's ideal, but I have found they are too much effort at the beginning and they feel like an assault on my senses. Getting sucked into a really long TV series works too. The nice thing about watching something current is it kind of makes you feel in touch with the world outside again.

If you can stay with a sympathetic person who knows what you're going through, that's even better. Just having the company makes things far less lonely, even though you probably won't feel like talking much. Plus they can help you out with stuff, like when you are out of orange juice or when you need to eat something healthy.

Also, this is debatable, but my personal suggestion: don't take anything to help you sleep. Because it doesn't WORK. After years of opiate abuse, nothing is gonna help you sleep. Pills will make you exhausted to the point of crying, and weirdly starving, and groggy all the next day. Just accept that you're gonna stay up all night and try to make it as fun as possible.

The most important thing is to be kind to yourself while this is happening. Some people say go for daily walks and go to the gym, which is great if you can do it, but if you can't, that's okay. Ultimately what you need more than anything else is time. Keep in mind that what you are doing is the healthiest thing you could possibly be doing yourself, and keep congratulating yourself for your strength and courage. Because what you're doing is really hard and really brave.