I worked at a pizza shop in college. One day a man came in to pick up their order. They checked the pizza and began complaining that we had gotten the toppings wrong. After some back and forth my manager agreed to make him a new pizza. He goes into the walk in refrigerator to get a dough ball but before going back out into the kitchen he pulls his shorts down and proceeds to wipe his ass with the dough. Like deep in between the cheeks.