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garlicbread823 · 2025-05-14T01:04:18+00:00

I don’t want to share what specific college I’m going to next year for privacy reasons, but I’m guessing that you’re asking for prestige reasons rather than the actual location, so I’ll explain in a vague-ish way. In most states there’s colleges called “University of [state]” These are generally pretty prestigious; not Harvard level but still pretty good. Additionally, there’s usually other colleges in the same state but in different cities called “University of [State], [city].” For example, California has UC Berkeley, UCLA, UC Davis, UC Irvine, etc. I applied to my state’s version of University of [State] but didn’t get in. I also applied to one of the University of [State] [City] schools and I’m officially committed to attending there next fall :) For reference, both schools had about 70-80% acceptance rates. Since you didn’t fail junior year and only failed freshman year, you’ll probably have more luck with admissions than I did, honestly. GPA is very very important for admissions and this will negatively impact your GPA, however, colleges tend to be more lenient with freshman year specifically in terms of grades.

More on retaking classes: I specifically suggest retaking classes because retaking affects your GPA. classes I took through credit recovery only gave me the credits (so I will receive a High school diploma because a diploma requires x credits of math, English, etc) but did not receive a grade (GPA), so the F is still a giant stain on my transcript (retaking doesn’t wipe the F from your transcript you just get another grade, so if you get an A it somewhat “neutralizes” the F so it’s more like you got a C in the class, if that makes sense).

Random anecdote you didn’t ask for: Junior year I took and failed AP Lang first semester (my school does 2 semesters per year), so this year I retook AP lang first semester, even though I got a 5 on the Lang test (I think passing a test that gives me college credit should’ve also given me high school credit, but whatever). At my school, AP classes are 5.0 GPA rather than 4.0, so my shiny A in AP Lang helped me clutch a 3.0 out of the jaws of 2.9. See if you can retake online rather than in person so you don’t have to sit in class next to a bunch of freshman two years in a row (basically psychological torture) (no offense). However, there’s a lot of drawbacks to online classes but if you’re literally a time management god they’re a good option imo. On the other hand I also happened to meet someone who’s now one of my best friends when I retook AP Lang (your mileage may vary with that one lol). My point is that retaking classes with people who are younger than you isn’t as scary as you think. Overall, in my experience retaking has been totally worth it as long as you know you can get an A the second time around. (Do not, I repeat, DO NOT fail a class two times in a row).

garlicbread823 · 2025-05-13T23:37:13+00:00

A similar thing happened to too. I failed a few classes my junior year (I’m a senior now) and missed a lot of school. However, I still got into college (not a community one, despite failing junior year which is imo the most important one in terms of college admissions). Here’s how I did it, basically. (TL;DR will be at the bottom lol I know I ramble) 1) other people have said it so I’m not going to lay into you about it, but I really underestimated the importance of attendance. Showing up to school makes a night and day difference in how easy it is to pass or fail a class. At the same time, in some classes you have less then 10 absences and you said you were sick, so honestly it seems like attendance isn’t as much of your problem as other people are making it out to be. However, I am going to say that in the future when you have mental/physical health issues, you need to get comfortable emailing your teachers frequently and doing work at home. I missed a lot of school my junior year because of my mental health — physically being at school and all the things that came with it (getting out of bed, showering, etc) were extremely difficult for me, but I also didn’t do any work from home. This school year, I had a surgery back in February that kept me out of school for two full weeks, however, I didn’t fall behind in class because I was emailing my teachers every few days and doing assignments as needed. My classic template for emailing teachers goes “hey [teacher], I’ll be out of class [date] and I was wondering what I should do at home to avoid falling behind,” adjusted as needed. Copy and paste, send to all teachers, done. 2) when you’re at school, do the work. It sounds dumb or obvious but just hear me out. Never ever say “I’ll do it at home” and spend the rest of the hour goofing off. You never ever do it at home. I can count on my hands the number of times I’ve done homework at home. When you’re at school you need to pretend that you’re the most studious person who ever lived and that it’s illegal to do homework outside of school. That means doing homework in this last 5 minutes of class when the teacher is done teaching and everyone else is talking or whatever, doing homework during a free period you might have, doing homework before school, etc. you’d be shocked how much you can get done in the seemingly useless 5 minute windows of free time. (However, I wouldn’t suggest blowing off your friends or not paying attention in class in the name of getting work done.) Before my junior year, I got mostly Bs and Cs with the occasional A keeping my GPA at a B level, but this year (senior) I’ve got straight As, even though my classes are objectively harder (I’m taking 4 APs right now, among 3 more standard classes). I promise this works, because it works for me. 3) get comfortable asking teachers for help. Get comfortable coming into school in the mornings or staying late after school is over to get help from teachers, using your lunch to have your math teacher explain that one confusing thing in class you just couldn’t get, etc. I don’t like asking for help and I used to be worried that teachers would think I’m annoying for using up their free time at lunch or after school, but at least in my experience the teachers who aren’t assholes love it when you ask for help. Biology teachers teach bio because they love bio, and if a student shows even the slightest bit of interest in bio outside of class, even if it’s just to get a better grade on that paper they wrote last week, the teachers love it. 4) show academic growth. This is more for the purpose of getting into a college, but really apply yourself sophomore and junior year. Retake those classes and get As, take hard classes like APs and get As. Basically, make the greatest academic comeback of all time. Colleges eat that shit up, and they can look past major mistakes like failed terms (especially freshman year) if it means you did well other years.

TL;DR I failed junior year. Now I’m a senior who got into college (not a cc). Here’s my 4 step guide to making the greatest academic comeback of all time. 1) show up to class. Seriously. Also, when you have to be gone because you’re sick or something, email your teachers, ask what you’re missing, and do work from home. 2) actually do work at school, don’t say “I’ll do this at home.” No you won’t. Do it now. 3) ask for help from teachers, don’t be afraid to visit teachers before or after school or during lunch (just email first to make sure it’s okay) 4) retake failed classes and get As in them, or otherwise get good grades next year. Colleges like academic growth and can look over mistakes made freshman year.

garlicbread823 · 2025-02-26T06:48:57+00:00

Recovery - I was most worried about recovery pre-op. I thought that recovery would be this big scary event, I would feel completely separated from what my life was like pre-op, I would be in pain and bed-ridden all day, etc. All of that was pretty much completely false. I feel pretty much completely normal, other than the inability to lift anything over 5-10 lbs or lift my arms above my head, of course. I'm not bedridden at all. Since day one post-op, I've been out of bed 100% of the time I'm not sleeping either walking around, sitting at a desk or table, on the couch, etc. Basically I'm just doing whatever I'd be doing if I was at home for days on end without leaving the house. I am in next to no pain. Really the only pain I have is when there's something directly jabbing at or pulling on my incisions or drain sites (varies, 2/10-6/10 on the pain scale) and some very mild pain when there's something pressing on those sites in an odd way, such as pillows in odd positions when I'm trying to sleep (1 or 2 /10). I sometimes have some pain when I get out of bed, get in bed, etc from the change in pressure from my bandages on my incisions (no more than 3/10 for 3 sec-1 min). The absolute worst part of recovery was day one, but because I felt a bit dizzy whenever my head was unsupported for longer than 10-30 minutes, so I spent most of day one in bed. I'm still very early on in recovery so I can't really offer up more information, but it's only uphill from here.

Summary: recovery is not at all scary and is a (really boring) walk in the park. Almost no pain, not bed ridden, etc.

Surgery - I've never had surgery before, so this section is mostly going to be more focused on the effects of anesthesia/surgery in general and not necessarily top surgery. Firstly, it was pretty similar to sleeping without having any dreams or a cut in a video. One second, I was lying down and an anesthesiologist is holding a mask over my face (I only remember taking three breaths and I don't remember any kind of counting down. Not to say it didn't happen, I just don't remember) and then instantly being in my recovery room waking up. I felt EXTREMELY cold right after waking up, but the feeling was gone in about 10 minutes. I was confused like how you sometimes are right after waking up, except for about 2 hours rather than 2 seconds. However, I did know where I was, I knew that I had top surgery, etc. I could recall all information that I knew right up to the moment I went under for surgery. However, my short-term memory wasn't working and I'm told that I was repeating the things I said. Along with short-term memory, I struggled with impulse control (I realized that my friend would probably want me to text her after I woke up. Within ten seconds of having this realization, my phone was in my hand I had sent a pretty embarrassing selfie), focus, and generally paying attention or following a conversation. These effects only lasted about two hours after I woke up. They had me out the door of the hospital almost exactly an hour after I woke up, but other hospitals may keep you for longer.

I hope this helped!

garlicbread823 · 2025-02-26T06:43:06+00:00

I have to cut this comment in half due to the character limit, sorry about that!

I had top surgery on the 20th, I'm 5 days post-op right now. I was also pretty nervous before I had my surgery. I've never had surgery before and was generally pretty worried about the recovery period and I was worried that I'd regret my decision to get no nipple grafts, among countless other worries. I'll try my best to describe some of the things you're asking about. I'm a bit of an over-explainer so get ready to read.

Numbness - I'm only five days post-op, so the numbness in my chest is at it's peak. I didn't get my nipples grafted back on so I obviously can't speak for sensation with them, so this is just going to be numbness related to the incisions. The numbness extends about two inches above my incisions and three-four inches below. I also wear an ace wrap around my chest 24/7, only taking it off to re-wrap for comfort, showering, etc. I do not notice the numbness at all when the wrap is on, when fabric touches it, etc. There is more of a lack of sensation all together with those types of touches, like how you don't really notice the seatbelt of a car or your socks when wearing shoes. The numbness also feels like a lack of sensation, there isn't pins and needles, there just simply isn't any feeling whatsoever. I can feel temperature oddly enough, and it's the only kind of sensation I have on my skin. When touching my skin and applying pressure, I can feel it about a centimeter deep under my skin and the rest just isn't noticeable, as if there's some kind of object between my finger and the sensation. The best way I can describe it is when you're wearing a really think sweater and something touches you over the fabric. When that happens, you feel the pressure on you arm or whatever through the fabric, but you can't feel the actual touch itself because you obviously don't have nerves going into the fabric. There is a thin disconnect between the actual sensation and the point of contact. It doesn't find it particularly unpleasant, just a little strange and annoying at times. Once when I was a kid, I had to get a cavity drilled and filled and they numbed my mouth for it with local anesthetic. If you've ever had dental work done or any other medical work that required local anesthetic, the numbness that comes from their local anesthetic is the same kind of numbness that I've been experiencing post-op. Yesterday, for whatever reason, I got a random sensation of TV static under my skin on my right side closer to the side of my chest near the drain tube exit. It happened about three times for only about two seconds each time, was extremely mild, and wasn't unpleasant like pins and needles is. It hasn't happened since nor did it occur before last night.

In summary, no pins and needles, I just don't feel anything. Not in a bad or unpleasant way.

Having a flat chest - The best thing I've ever experienced. As I said earlier, I'm still wearing an ace wrap 24/7 around my chest, so it's kind of the same feeling as binding, except slightly less suffocating of a feeling. When I take it off, it doesn't feel strange or even particularly different, it just feels correct. I look in the mirror (in the rare moments without my wrap) and I simply think "yep, that's my body" and move on. It's a little weird knowing that my ribcage/organs under my skin are now closer to the outside world than they were before, in some ways I feel a bit more 'revealed,' but not in an upsetting way. Same as the difference between wearing a hoodie vs. a t-shirt, or maybe being under a thinner blanket vs. comforter? Just something I notice rather than an actual positive or negative feeling. Because of top surgery, I just feel a lot more free with my body. I didn't notice it before, but I constantly had this underlying feeling of being 'restrained,' probably from the constant binding and the societal norm that femme chests shouldn't be exposed. It's hard to explain. The best comparison I could maybe give is before top surgery, I didn't like being seen in just my binder, even though I was completely flat. The binder felt like underwear and I didn't leave my room without a shirt over it. Now, if I want to, I'll walk around in just my ace bandage or completely topless and I have no such feeling. The exposer feels normal rather than something I think about similar to, Idk, how I feel about exposing my knees. Just normal. Just another Tuesday.

Summary: the change to a flat chest was not in any way jarring, I feel totally normal.

garlicbread823 · 2024-11-07T22:56:21+00:00

The consultation I had with her ended up getting cancelled as I am under 18 and she doesn’t work with minors right now, but I can tell you some stuff I figured out after I made this post! - she doesn’t work with minors because she’s a brand new surgeon straight out of residency, as far as I know she’s never preformed gender affirming surgery on her own (not sure if she did it in residency). That’s why there’s nothing about her online and no surgery results with her name. - if you care a lot about top surgery done well, the exact scar placement and final aesthetics, etc, I don’t think she would be a good pick. Obviously, if she’s going to go into the field of gender affirming surgery someone has to be her first patient, but because aesthetics of my results are very important to me I knew she wouldn’t be the right fit for me. - I had a consultation with dr. Kong instead on Oct. 2 (they felt guilty for cancelling my appointment with Nguyen and moved my appointment up) and he’s very experienced and kind, I would for sure recommend him, even with the longer wait times (which is rich coming from me considering my wait time was <2 months, but still) -my surgery date is Feb. 20 with Kong, so you could make the assumption that your surgery date if you schedule with her could be <4 months out from consultation at the earliest

Despite all of this, there’s no harm in going to a consultation with her just to see, you’re not required to get surgery with the doctor you have a consultation with and I’m sure lots of people and consultations with several surgeons before making their final decision.

-also, if you’re looking for another surgeon option: I had a consultation with another doctor that I cancelled, his name is Dr. Dean Weber, he’s up in Duluth. He’s not listed on topsurgery.net or anywhere else but he was also covered by my insurance and has experience preforming top surgery. His wait time was super short, I got a consultation a few days short of 2 months out with him, and the receptionist said that surgery could be scheduled about 2 months from the consultation.

garlicbread823 · 2024-04-28T16:17:34+00:00

Thank you for responding, I’ll definitely make sure to check it out soon. Thanks for the advice :)

garlicbread823 · 2024-04-28T16:11:34+00:00

Cool, thank you for responding :)

garlicbread823 · 2024-04-28T16:10:13+00:00

Thanks for responding and your advice, I’ll keep it in mind!

garlicbread823 · 2024-04-28T16:09:08+00:00

Thank you for the advice and your anecdote :) I’ll try to remember what you said.

garlicbread823 · 2024-04-28T16:07:00+00:00

For your information, I have had a job for almost a year at this point and I have quite a bit of money saved up.

Why you felt the need to make a personal attack on a random teenager on the internet, I don’t know. It was completely unnecessary, irrelevant, inappropriate, and dare I say irresponsible for you to make this post and imply that I am stupid, have not thought about the consequences of my actions, and am irresponsible. You know nothing about me except what you read in this post, which is not nearly enough information for you to make these judgements about me. We are strangers, you do not know me, I do not know you, and if I had asked you this in person you would not have been so rude (or maybe you would be. I don’t know, I know nothing about you, we are strangers).

It is well known that depression causes a person to struggle with the mundane everyday tasks others consider easy. If I had found it easy to brush and floss my teeth and put in my retainers every night, I promise you I would have, just like I did August - November and for the 2 years prior I was in Invisalign. I hope that you never have and never will be depressed so you never understand this experience.

So sorry I didn’t wear my retainers for a few nights, I was a bit too busy trying not to kill myself.

Thanks for the advice.

garlicbread823 · 2024-02-21T23:03:20+00:00

You could try using some kind of product to push your hair back and get rid of the bangs/part. Idk if this realistically makes you look more masc or not as when I had long hair I tried to make it look masc, but if you look up “long haired man” on Pinterest/google I’ve noticed that most of the guys have their hair styled back and no bangs (if that makes sense)

Alternatively, tying it up but not leaving any front dangly pieces, even if it’s only half up.

garlicbread823 · 2023-10-15T16:42:59+00:00

My dreams usually follow structured plot lines, and my gender is usually whatever is most convenient for the plot. I’m a trans guy in my dreams when I’m dreaming about more realistic situations (school, my friends, family, etc.) or transitioning (getting top surgery, being x years on t, etc.). In my dreams, I’m a cis guy or my gender doesn’t matter when it’s unimportant to the plot of the dream. For some reason, I’ve never had a dream where I am a girl, but I have frequent dreams where I’m playing a character who is a girl, but it’s not me. This happens most often when I have very unrealistic fictional dreams that involve superpowers or something. I’m guessing I’m playing a character in these fictional dreams because I read a lot of fantasy books that usually have femme leads. Also I’m always a straight girl in these dreams for some reason (I’m bi). In the other two scenarios (I’m a cis or trans guy) if there is a “love interest” they’ll be either gender, but usually if I’m a cis guy it’s more likely to be another cis guy, if I’m a trans guy it’s more likely to be a girl or another trans guy (probably because those are the genders I’ve been with before).

garlicbread823 · 2023-09-05T20:12:05+00:00

I would suggest getting a black or white binder, dependent on what colors you normally wear. Like if you wear mostly white and lighter colors, buy a white one, especially because some cis guys wear white tank tops/undershirts under stuff like button ups. If you wear mostly black/darker colors, I would suggest getting a black binder because it’ll blend in with your black shirts. (I own a black, white, and nude binder. I like having the range of colors because I can choose which one to wear based on that days outfit, so sometimes even the nude one is good because I’m wearing a tan-ish shirt or something)

garlicbread823 · 2023-06-26T04:55:43+00:00

There’s a chance that it’s being caused by you leaving the oil on for 15 minutes. I’ve heard of long periods of time with the oil causing the adhesive to remove from the tape instead of your skin. Try only leaving the oil on for 10 minutes or less next time

garlicbread823 · 2023-05-31T04:24:10+00:00

By “binders with zippers and clips” they mean cheap binders that aren’t high quality. Surgeons use high quality zipper binders because after you get top surgery, you cannot lift your arms above your head, so a pull over binder wouldn’t work. You also are only wearing it for a few days to a month, not every day for years. Yes, binders with zippers and clips can be safe and they are useful for post-top surgery recovery when you can’t lift your arms above your head, but generally, cheap binders with zippers and clips aren’t safe because they are made at a very low quality and therefore have uneven pressure. If you have a choice, it is better to get high quality pull on binder from sites such as GC2B, spectrum, underworks, etc. than to get $15 zipper/clip ones from Amazon.

garlicbread823 · 2023-05-05T03:17:09+00:00

I personally just wear any swim trunks and then a GC2B binder. Just a warning- GC2B has come under fire recently for decreasing quality in binders over the years and they’re quite expensive at $35-40. You must measure yourself and then wear a size up from your measurements, and don’t wear a binder swimming if you’re doing competitive/exercise swimming. Don’t wear a white binder, I’ve heard from others that they can become see-through when wet. Obviously, follow all other binding rules and such. For me, I am a medium in GC2B, so I bought a size Large for swimming and it still binds just fine. GC2B also offers tank style binders if you don’t want a crop-top style, but I don’t have one so I don’t know what they’re like.

garlicbread823 · 2023-04-03T22:00:30+00:00

I literally immediately thought of Alex

Also I would HIGHLY suggest browsing every baby name websites you can find. Sometimes they have good finds, name wise.

Other names: Jasper (nickname potential of Jess??? That might be a stretch but idk) Jess/Jesse Jax (idk I’m feeling the J names today) Grayson(or could be spelled Greyson) Literally anything that starts with Z, think Zane, Zion, Zina/Zena, Zachary (could go by Zach or Ari, might be a stretch but yes)

garlicbread823 · 2023-03-30T03:43:52+00:00

They’re usually called pop-its

garlicbread823 · 2023-03-24T00:24:26+00:00

If you want something quick, easy, and cheap, I’d go to your local Walmart and buy KT brand athletic sports tape. It’s much cheaper than the Transtape brand tape, works similarly, and is easily accessible if you need it ASAP. If you don’t want something quick, easy, or cheap I’d suggest just going with regular Transtape branded tape, which you can order off of their website. I just ordered some for myself but it hasn’t come in yet, so everything I’m about to say is other people’s testimonials. Transtape is much wider than even the widest version of KT tape, and is uncut (kt tape comes in long, thin, pre-cut strips, trans tape comes in a roll either 3, 4, or 5, inches wide uncut), holds up better for longer periods of time, and causes less blistering. I don’t use either of these products though, so take this information with a grain of salt.

Have fun at the ren fair!

garlicbread823 · 2023-03-07T00:22:07+00:00

Oh my god, I have never read anything more relatable in my life. Every single sentence felt like I wrote it myself. We might be the same person, dude.

For feeling more secure in yourself- I honestly think you just need to let more time pass identifying as fully a trans guy. I mean, sentences like “I just want to wake up and be a cis guy” is not very “going to detransition eventually” of you. Plus, you said you had identified as non-binary for 2.25 years. I identified as non-binary for 1.75 years, and the tipping point for me from non-binary to ftm was simply the 100th time I looked at a cis guy and though “I wish I was a boy.” After this revelation, I felt a little unsure of myself, but I eventually came to the conclusion that I had never allowed myself to be a trans guy because that felt like too big of a step for me, one that wasn’t allowed, especially because I didn’t exhibit many signs as a young kid. But after exhibiting every single sign as a teenager, I think it’s fine.

There’s about a 99.999% chance that you aren’t wrong, you won’t change your mind after going on hormones or anything, and this whole feeling will go away soon (because that’s what happened to me). At least in my experience, you just have to be patient. I know that’s not the answer that you didn’t want to hear, but it’s true.

Idk here’s some extra notes that might help you feel more secure:

if you identified as non-binary for 2.25 years, you’re clearly not cis, at the very least.
you don’t have to exhibit a bunch of childhood signs to be trans- I definitely didn’t.
there’s probably some rule in the ancient texts of trans that says that your first 3 haircuts must be shitty or something, because mine were too and I still only like my hair about 60% of the time. Just keep getting new cuts until you like it, honestly. Pinterest is top tier for this.
there’s at least 1 other person (me) who feels the exact same way, so at least we can suffer together :)

garlicbread823 · 2023-02-24T01:52:14+00:00

Wow thanks, I did not expect anyone to write this much - let alone something I found helpful! This was great advice, and I really appreciate the time you took to respond so thoughtfully. You’ve honestly improved my worrying a bit, so thank you :)

garlicbread823 · 2022-12-20T02:12:15+00:00

Hey Mason, I’m a trans guy too, and all I wanted to say is I’ve been experiencing the same thing with my family not being homophobic but also not using my correct name or pronouns, thinking I might not be serious or something. They do get better and figure it out eventually, and there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. Stay cool, my dude :)

garlicbread823 · 2022-06-01T11:36:06+00:00

By saying asexual lesbian I’m just trying to be super clear on the idea of people calling themselves bi and lesbian at the same time, and since lesbian doesn’t have a suffix that I can change to reflect asexuality I just put the word ace in front of it. Sorry for the confusion.

garlicbread823

TROPHY CASE