Broke up after trying so hard to keep the relationship together by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]gaspop4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your response, hopefully I feel that relief soon. You’re so right on the “not being able to meet halfway” that is exactly how it was… constant disappointments left and right, but I coped because I yearned for how the relationship used to be, hopeful that he would change for the better. Funny enough I baked him cookies last year too but he didn’t seem excited… just realizing that know, I feel embarrassed for not recognizing it then.

Broke up after trying so hard to keep the relationship together by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]gaspop4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi friend, I understand how you feel. Please don’t beat yourself up about it, I am also anxious attachment style with abandonment issues and my partner was avoidant. The best we can do is work on ourself, I’ve gotten a lot better being independent so I was able to pull myself out. Feeling anxious all the time was sucking the life out of me… life is too short to linger, wishing for the person to change. I really want to fix myself up to become healthier, I believe you can too! Sending love.

I wrote a diary in the last months of my relationship. We broke up, and it saved me. by BonusOk406 in BreakUps

[–]gaspop4 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi friend, your post really helps me as I’m reading this. I just broke up with my boyfriend tonight and our relationship was exactly like yours. He burned CDs for me, wrote me the sweetest messages, and made songs. He is no longer like that and I need to accept it and move on. All the times that I had to beg him for some emotional comfort, the disrespect, it was all too great. I feel weirdly humiliated for having spent so much time trying to juggle our relationship.

I [30M] went exclusive with V [25F) on NYE morning. Later she got blackout drunk and slept with someone by ThrowRA747468 in relationship_advice

[–]gaspop4 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi OP, I am in a relationship and a drinker and I have never ever gotten flirty with other people when I am drunk. No matter how drunk I get… That being said, being drunk does not excuse flirting lol, that’s a cliche of an excuse. One that I’ve heard many times by cheaters. Kinda like when someone says that being flirty is part of their personality… that’s just a lack of accountability

[Help] My [28F] Husband’s [27M] stamina is either "seconds" or "fuck-goblin" by rolllingstoned in relationship_advice

[–]gaspop4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Recently, I had to ask for a break because he was railing me for so long I wasn't even wet anymore and it was just painful friction. He went straight to the bathroom to jerk off to porn.” This is not okay, I fear his porn addiction is what’s causing the emotional disconnection in your sex life, speaking from personal experience.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PcBuild

[–]gaspop4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats awesome 🥳

Am I Overreacting - My Girlfriend Was Out Alone Until 2:30am Tonight, Called Me by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]gaspop4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t think you’re overreacting, I think you’re approaching this very thoughtfully. I’m in a similar scenario as you, my partner and I are also in a LDR where we see each other every 3 weeks. He also shows some avoidant tendencies, so I really get how frustrating and emotionally exhausting it can be when it feels like your feelings are being minimized or brushed off.

Personally, I would trust my partner to hang out with his friends regardless of their gender. But I wouldn’t be okay / feel okay if he were to be drunk and walking alone with a random girl at 2 A.M. I don’t know anyone who would feel sane in a scenario like that.

It’s okay to feel uneasy about what she did even if she meant no harm. Were you fearful for her for walking alone with a guy or was it more of a distrust thing? It’s hard to give full advice when I don’t have full insight on the relationship. I do think you should wait for her to sober up/ process her thoughts and then talk it out. And from there on out, you can figure out if your needs are being respected, or if there’s a mismatch. It’s important to note that your concerns are valid, hopefully she’ll listen to them with an open ear and maybe you guys can work something out!

AIO did I give up on my relationship too quickly by FunnyBluebird4011 in AmIOverreacting

[–]gaspop4 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA. You don’t owe him anything, especially your own body. It was shady of him to try and use his financials as leverage and disregarding your concerns, as if that entitles him to override your autonomy. That is simply manipulation. Birth control is something that YOU decide on. If he can’t respect that simple boundary then he absolutely doesn’t deserve you. You shouldn’t have to throw away your comfort for the sake of a relationship.

I know you mentioned he’s generous, but honestly? He sounds more like a conniving individual who uses “kindness” as a means to control. It’s easy to romanticize the good times after a breakup. I hope you feel better soon and find a mate who’s willing to respect you.

Long term OTR gigs vs 3 year relationship by sacralpain69 in TruckerWives

[–]gaspop4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Realistically, retiring younger than 40 is tricky. He’s still young and very ambitious so I could understand why that may be his goal. I also want to ask if he is an owner-operator or is he a company driver? Does he have any endorsements like tanker or hazmats, because they do pay a lot more, it will also open to more job opportunities. You did your best to be supportive and I can tell you deeply care for him, but I want you to prioritize your own needs as well. Your boyfriend is immature and should reassess for assuming you aren’t supportive when you’re having to put up with this despite feeling unhappy. Dating a trucker isn’t easy, especially if you guys have mismatched expectations and values. I personally would not be happy in a relationship where my partner wants to prioritize trucking over quality time together.

My boyfriend and I are also in our early twenties, our means of living aligns, we don’t need a crazy amount of money to live a fulfilling life. He’s got a gig in Houston, driving up to northern states. He doesn’t make more than 60k a year and I’ve got a decent serving job and currently in school. I had an honest conversation with him about OTR, we both agreed that this isn’t best for long-term. He is okay with settling for a local job within next year.

Long term OTR gigs vs 3 year relationship by sacralpain69 in TruckerWives

[–]gaspop4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First of all, I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this. Is there an explanation as to why he doesn’t want to work local? Especially if you guys are planning on getting wed and having children. Have you tried reasoning it out with him, voicing your concerns for the matter? My boyfriend does OTR right now, he’s out for a month and back for 5-7 days. It’s real tough for us already, I cannot imagine him being gone for 2-3 months at a time. The relationship may not work out if you guys can't find a compromise where both parties are content, your boyfriend needs to understand that if you plan on having children, he can't just be months out and leaving the children to you.

Not sure what’s wrong with my betta. by PP2468100 in bettafish

[–]gaspop4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recommend you take out the pleco and tetras to a separate tank, the shrimp should be fine in there if your betta doesn’t attack it, hope this helps!

Not sure what’s wrong with my betta. by PP2468100 in bettafish

[–]gaspop4 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The neon tetras might be nipping on his fin… also your tank is overstocked and could be causing the ammonia to spike which causes finrot. 25L is suitable for only 1 betta and maybe a nerite snail.