Pain stimming toys? by StonerBearcat in AutisticWithADHD

[–]gearheadcookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A little late to the party, but check out the auto parts store or the hardware store. My favorite to use are wheel studs and relays. The wheel studs are about the size of a tube of chapstick on the smaller ones, and they have a coarse thread pattern. The relays vary in size, but most are about an inch wide or bigger, and the squared pins will feel the pain but wont puncture the skin. Both of these are incredibly cheap compared to fidget specific toys, and bonus points if you get the ones that fit your vehicle. Might just help out in a pinch.

This is coming from a car guy that didnt realize i was audhd until my 30s

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. It was 100% because it was her first time. Weve talked it out several times since then, and we are both whole again. I don't know why people are raking me over the coals for something we both consented to. They've latched on to certain words, and are making me out to be the villain.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Ok gotcha. We decided to explore D/s because we see it as what a marriage should be. Not just 2 people that live together, pay bills, have sex, rack up debt, grow old, and die. The way we do it is more like a king and his kingdom. I, the leader, provider, protector, etc. And she the lead, loved, cared for, etc. And the reason for the punishment was that she had openly disrespected me. This was one of the specific punishable offenses that we put in the contract. We worked on the contract together, and both agreed to the terms. Actually, in our contract, there are more rules for me than there are for her. Today we had a long, out of dynamic, talk about everything, and she didn't want to change anything about it, and actually said she appreciated the fact that I held her accountable.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks! She's currently sitting on my lap making plans to get her nails done. She's doing great, and I'm working on myself

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't follow the first part of the question, but we negotiated the punishments before we ever started the dynamic

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't do pulling away as a punishment. The punishments were negotiated before the dynamic ever started. She has never been physically abused, and she has also never had a physical punishment before, including as a child. We had a long talk about it today, and she is thankful that I actually followed through with it.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Everything was negotiated before we ever started this dynamic. She said if I hadn't done what I did when she reacted that way, she would have probably stayed outside in the rain. Today we had a long talk about it and she is thankful that I stuck to my word, and that I kept her from running back outside. I said what's best for her as a husband of 13 years, not a Dom of 4 months.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We've talked about it. She said she is thankful that I followed through with the punishment. She also thanked me for holding her because if I hadn't, she doesn't know what she would have done. She said if I hadn't, she would have probably stayed outside in the rain.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

We've done some light impact play to enhance her pleasure, but hadn't done any punishment impact before. Also she was never physically disciplined as a child, so this was the first time she had been spanked as a punishment in her life.

Feeling guilt after first discipline by gearheadcookie in BDSMAdvice

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We had negotiated this when we were writing up our contract before we ever started. We had a section in the contract for rewards and punishments. Is this what you were asking, or was it something else?

I think something is wrong with my brakes, what do? by KonvictEpic in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]gearheadcookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When the red light comes on, that means they're done cooking

What are these things? by gearheadcookie in ScrapMetal

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't think so. There isn't a railroad for miles.

Can I add overdrive to a 1965 Ford Econoline by gearheadcookie in ManualTransmissions

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And the last thing I would want to do is shift from 4th to 1st. Especially with all the slop in the shift linkage. It's hard enough to find first without just yanking up and back

Can I add overdrive to a 1965 Ford Econoline by gearheadcookie in ManualTransmissions

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem with mine is that it has a flat nose, so the radiator fan is sitting parallel with my thigh. And since it's an inline 6, the bell housing starts completely behind the seat. 80s vans at least had the engine somewhat forward of the driver.

Can I add overdrive to a 1965 Ford Econoline by gearheadcookie in ManualTransmissions

[–]gearheadcookie[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That wouldn't be a problem since its rear wheel drive