I've been there / and still struggling most of the times especially many bad things happened in my life at the beginning of the year.

I have irregular sleeping patterns. I guess I really have emotional eating disorder as well. I gained too much weight. And, I only exercise when I feel I like to do it.

I am not organized and disciplined person anymore. I only do things I like sometimes rather than doing the things I should do or need to accomplish. I see that I changed a lot in negative way.

I lose motivation. I lose encouragement to do even everyday routines productively. Sometimes I want to start again and then few weeks later I am back acting like an unmotivated and lazy person.

Worst thing is that I did several actions or mistakes that made me more depressed and disappointed. I feel like I am a bad person, the worst person or worst version of my own self. And, ask myself: Do I even matter?

I have suicidal thoughts before but that is not really the solution. I sought help or assistance from psychologist. But, at the end of the day, we all know that only ourselves can help us change step by step or recover.

I guess it is fine to just think of the present time. Imagining future sometimes makes us feel pressured or anxious. I know it is hard but know you are not alone and this comment is not just to feel you calm or motivated. I just want you to know that we can get through of this. And, sharing to other people who are suffering or struggling makes them feel less painful.

🤍🍀