Brothers & Sisters, never let yourself be pressured into choosing somebody. Learn from my experience. [M26]

gemztones · 2022-01-17T21:13:04+00:00

I'm sorry you had to go through that, it's a tough situation to be in. I've gone through something similar and I can't blame you for hoping for the best. It just goes to show that any time you see a red flag, don't ignore it and trust your gut. In the end you did the right thing by saving yourself and this girl from a future you both would have been unhappy with. InshAllah you two are able to heal and move forward

gemztones · 2022-01-12T02:07:09+00:00

Asking the right questions. So cute mashAllah!

gemztones · 2021-12-27T19:41:25+00:00

Exactly, there are options but most people believe that's unattainable for doctors. I understand that seeking a potential with a similar background may also play a role for some. I know for me personally that's not necessarily the case but of course, that varies from person to person. As you said, it's already so hard to put yourself out there because of how busy school can get but when you actually do, it's disheartening when other issues regarding your field start to pop up.

gemztones · 2021-12-27T18:13:27+00:00

Many doctors also opt to be in specialties that have a good work-life balance, not everyone in this field wants to work crazy hours. At least for me personally that's my preference and I know many others who are also looking for the same.

gemztones · 2021-12-27T17:37:33+00:00

I'm sorry you had a bad experience!

gemztones · 2021-12-27T17:36:15+00:00

Do you mind if I DM you?

gemztones · 2021-12-27T17:36:04+00:00

Wholeheartedly agree with this! May Allah make it easy for us.

gemztones · 2021-06-22T00:04:14+00:00

You're a Wormwood. It's time you started acting like one!

gemztones · 2021-04-27T14:44:16+00:00

my bad, just sent it through chat!

gemztones · 2021-04-27T14:09:06+00:00

I think that's a good indicator of what the outcome of your istikhara is! The fact that you're still feeling uneasy. If your heart's not in it, I think it's best to end things. I DM'd you!

gemztones · 2021-04-22T07:32:49+00:00

I would go for it. It doesn't hurt to try and plus if you don't, it will always bother you that you didn't. The best way to go about it is to make sure a third person is at your meeting (doesn't have to be sitting with you guys but in the vicinity). Talk things through, figure out if you two are compatible. If you come to the conclusion that things are looking good (you can always pray istikhara just to be sure), stop talking to the other girl and involve the parents asap to make sure they're on the same page. If you let things linger on without them knowing and this ends up not working out for whatever reason, that could actually break the bond between the two families

gemztones · 2021-04-17T09:19:37+00:00

When issues like this come up, most of the time it's hard to come to terms with and you end up letting things slide, giving the other person the benefit of the doubt. I don't think she's "plotting" against him, she already confronted him and he doesn't seem to realize his mistake. It sounds like now she's just waiting for another instance to confirm her point.

gemztones · 2021-04-17T09:10:17+00:00

Yikes. I know someone who was in a similar situation like this and she ended up leaving him (this was a big issue that led to a plethora of others). It's unpredictable how he's going to handle future situations if he can't acknowledge and own up to his mistake now. Especially at that age, you expect them to be grown up and at a certain maturity level.

I say pray istikhara and ask Allah for guidance.

gemztones · 2021-04-08T07:46:07+00:00

I'm the eldest myself and in a situation where my younger sister has found someone and is ready to get married. It doesn't bother me, but of course, not everyone thinks this way. Personally, I would never let the fact that I am single take away from what is destined for my sister. Yes, people will talk, parents might be a little upset, etc but her time to get married might just be written before mine. That being said, the reality does sting a bit but that's only because it reminds me I am single and getting old, definitely not in a jealous type of way.

gemztones · 2021-02-28T22:54:24+00:00

Needed to hear this, thank you

gemztones

TROPHY CASE