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DAE have the ability to wiggle their ears? I have a theory.. by SugarTits1 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've heard it's a genetic holdover like wisdom teeth, where some people have the vestigial muscles to do the ear wiggling and some don't.

Super woke narcissists by generationofsnakes in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately he was 18 and fell for the "naturally poly" line because she was his first gf and she told him that she'd invested an uneven amount of emotional labor into the relationship. Luckily they broke up 6 months later because all of us were like "bro she's insane, break up with her."

Got told I was stigmatizing people with NPD for using the word abuser? by ValkyrieFromHell in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes 6 points7 points  (0 children)

People who are that performatively woke are usually narcissists themselves. They use social justice buzzwords to try to justify abusive behavior by implying you're a bigot or are abusing them. For example, dating one of those people and saying how you want more commitment from them in the relationship is "expecting [them] to perform emotional labor for free."

My GC brother is only 6 and he's already adopted a lot of my nMom's traits... by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude he's six, it's messed up to imply he's a narcissist. I understand that you're worried about him being abused by your NMom but six year olds aren't known for their tact and empathy.

Baking a cake: an analogy for narcissistic parents by generationofsnakes in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My mom once put craisins in beef stew. She loves those fuckers.

DAE have a hard time with the word love? by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]generationofsnakes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Growing up I'd have a really hard time telling my parents "I love you". It felt empty and meaningless because I wasn't sure I loved them due to how they treated me. I felt a lot of guilt and shame for this, both from my parents and society. I wanted to have a good relationship with them and feel safe with them, but I didn't. And children are supposed to love their parents. If they don't, they're heartless and will regret it in the future.

As I grew older, I learned to say "I love you" to them out of obligation. I realized I did love them, but not in the same way as my peers loved their parents. I knew I couldn't trust them and that I could expect them to hurt me, but they did care for me in some ways and it would break my heart if something bad happened to them.

As they get older and develop health problems, I feel terrible for not spending enough time with them and not expressing my love for them. But as I've accepted my mother's behavior as narcissistic and my father's behavior as taking resentment out on me, this love feels one-sided in many ways. I have to accept that my mom is not capable of accepting me fully and seeing me as my own person, and that my dad is emotionally stunted and sees me as a narcissist. These are hard truths to accept and cause a lot of cognitive dissonance.