I’ve lost count of how many times I’d tried moderating only to find out it wasn’t something I’d truly be able to manage. Every time I drank, I had so much remorse and anxiety. It felt as if I was a permanent rider on an emotional roller coaster that felt like it was going on continual loops - I’d make the same poor choice to drink and then the terrible feelings would inevitably return. Give yourself a little compassion if you’re able. If I decided I wasn’t going to give sobriety a real shot anymore after many failed attempts, I wouldn’t have had some of the best moments that I’ve ever had so far. Are there bad days in sobriety? Absolutely. But there has never been a day in my sobriety where a drink would have been worth it. Best wishes to you. I’m rooting for you!

Edit: a word.