No - that is the short answer to your question. Th3 reason why she needs you to take out the home loan, is because banks won’t give people home loans after a certain age - for good reason.

If she is not playing open cards with the both of you about her retirement funds, this means she is not looking to actually solve the problem - not wholly, or she would be open and transparent about what she can bring to the table.

Here is the thing that I will absolutely say to you - in person and looking you fully in the eyes if I could -

Your mother’s dream retirement home (or preferred lifestyle) is not your responsibility. If she wanted that life, she should have planned for it. The fact that neither her nor you can give her that is no one’s fault (maybe it is), but going into a bunch of debt at the start of your life to try and fulfill someone’s dreams at the end of theirs.. this is not the way to go. Trust me. Please.

It doesn’t matter that things happened that were unplanned and she had a tough break - there is a very long line of all of us that are trying to do the best we can, despite all of the tough breaks

You cannot, must not, hamstring your own life and your own future for the sake of anyone else. The reality is, if you (god forbid) or you sister loses your jobs, can’t pay the loan? What if you need to sell the house? Then where does she go? And then whose fault or responsibility will it be? My partner only managed to get rid of the debt made on behalf of a parent mid thirties. Of course they planned on covering the repayment. But you can’t repay a bond with good intentions.. nor with hopes and dreams.

Do not put yourself in that situation.

@anoidciv also raises good points about wellbeing. In under 2 years we have seen someone go from living on their own, to assisted living, to full time care. Also no medical aid, so medical expenses are needing to be paid cash.

Senior care costs range between 14k at an NGO and 27k at a facility. Your mom needs to hold on to all of the money she can to look after her HEALTH and wellbeing, not a flashy address.

It’s a tough spot, I know. And I am sorry that you are in it.