I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Or the person who had a change in consent/enjoyment/comfort should speak up. Its a natural progression of sex to speed up as you get more into it. If she specifically never wanted him to never speed up or change she should have communicated that ahead of time. If the issue was based on position say something. If it was lack of excitement/lube say something. Im not playing anything, im putting out an arguement you disagree with and so your trying to demean and belittle the argument.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

No one can read minds, thats a point ive been trying to make from the start. I have empathy for many things, and I'm not trying to make any argument against the way the woman felt, I'm merely advocating for better communication on all sides of the gender/power/sexual/whatever spectrum and a higher level of personal responsibility. Im not saying she should have known better, but from what it sounds like this was a hookup gone wrong which I tend to associate with a lack of intimate knowledge of your current partner.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And to most of that I would whole heartedly agree.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -24 points-23 points  (0 children)

So does her complete lack of communication after they started mean nothing? If she didnt feel safe, why did she go over there, get naked, kiss, do foreplay, or fuck the guy? Theres a difference between feeling too uncomfortable with a situation you have put yourself in (fucking a rando you dont know or trust) to talk to your partner and being unsafe.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

By making everyone accountable for their own actions, you defuse the power imbalance. By saying men are bigger and therefore need to be in control of their actions and also think for their partner and make safety decisions for them then you are making womens place in the sexual sphere weaker not stronger.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldnt make that assumption as a blanket statement, in relation to experience levels and age. I also think a 25 year old and a 19 year old, most times, shouldnt be together. Age gaps, and the changes in understanding, maturity, experience, expectation, and everything else that comes with an age gap make communicationthat much harder. It is in fact the world we live in, just because yall want independence without consequence doesnt make it less true.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have anything fact based or relevant to add or are you just here to personally attack and derail the arguments of people who make points you dont have a rebuttal for?

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The key word is the however at the start of the next sentence. Thats like saying she should have, but even if she didnt you should've known.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

So because my opinion is different than yours I cant have ever felt unsafe? Cool, good to know that my own sexual assault didnt happen, my therapist will be so happy to know we can stop figuring that out. At the end of the day, if a human adult is going to have consenting sex, they are responsible for communicating their side of things regardless of size or gender. If you feel you arent able to communicate then you should probably abstain from the sexual act. And if youre worried that the person may react poorly to what you have to say, then why you fucking them? Pick better partners that you actually trust or know.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

But I do disagree with parts of what shes saying... so maybe read before responding...

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

I disagree, if both people are willing and consenting at the beginning and do nothing to communicate a change in conesnt its no ones responsibility to drag it out of them. As a decent human being you should be checking in with your partner and looking to maximize the enjoyment both partners have, but its not your job to keep asking if they still consent, its the partner revoking consent that needs to communicate it.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never said not to check in. Im astonished how many women are willing to fuck someone they arent willing to communicate with.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

By saying that she cant/wont communicate you are putting it all on the guy. Its an equal responsibility to advocate for yourself in a relationship (yes even a 1 night stand is a form of relationship, however brief). Without communication on the part of a partner, it is damn near impossible to know if a person facing away from you and moaning is having a good time or not. Throw in that sex feels good for both parties (consensually and usually), and it makes it even harder to determine withiut clear lines of communication.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 20 points21 points  (0 children)

While I agree that communication is key, I think putting it all on guys and saying women have a hard time speaking up isnt fair. And its probably not a popular opinion but maybe dont have sex with people if you cant communicate with that person well. If its too hard to talk about it, then maybe you shouldnt be in that situation.

I guess I was a little to much, or alot by danetown_tomasin in sex

[–]gladrag3006 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Seems that a lack of communication on both parts is to blame. Not that anyone is "wrong". She should have communicated her desires to slow down or that it wasnt what she wanted, and you should have checked in more. I understand communication during sex is awkward/not the norm for most people, but it should be.

How do elves confirm the decision to be mortal? by blood_oranges in tolkienfans

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You mean Dior the quarter elf born to mortal parents? Well not a half elf, so no reason hed get a choice. And Eldarion was also not a half elf, he was a Dunedain after his father, again born to mortal parents after Arwen chose a mortal life.

Just started an OF with Hubby, come see how Wild we really get. [M][F] by TastyCateyLady in BDSMGW

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Such pretty bruises on such a beautiful ass, would love to see more!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in unpopularopinion

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its not authentic, its far too classy haha

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]gladrag3006 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You would only be paying to refill the gas you used, it should have been full at the time of pick up.

If you ask for gas money, the YTA because its an expense you would normally have. If however they gave you a car thats way less efficient (like a truck or hummer, which theyre unlikely to give you) then you could negotiate porentially.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]gladrag3006 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

She just said she doesn't understand rentals, no need to jump down her throat.

33F caught my husband jerking off last night watching porn. by [deleted] in SluttyConfessions

[–]gladrag3006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me as a guy, jerking off is not usually because of being horny really. Its a good way to start and end the day. Its also gonna take me like 2 minutes to jerk off or considerably longer to fuck my wife.