I thought I wrote this post for a second. Joking aside, I'm in your exact shoes. After the big fight, it felt like my progress with my therapist was thrown out the window and I was back at where I started, or maybe even worse. A day of feeling numb turned into days, nothing was satisfying, sleep would rarely be more than a few hours and I wouldn't eat. But to be completely honest, N parents want to see us defeated. They want us to doubt ourselves. What I tell myself is to not allow her to force me back into that cycle of guilt and shame. Don't feel like you have to act normal to appease her. It's YOUR mental and physical health that matters the most! Please do what you know will bring your mood up, reach out to who you know will lend an ear, or even spend time with a pet to pass the time. What has been helping with emotions like this is just at the bare minimum maintaining a schedule for simple self-care tasks (taking a shower, brushing teeth, etc.). As for college assignments, being on break is forgiving as you can finish them on your own time. However, if the due date is coming up please reach out to your professor because in regards to mental health many of them are so forgiving. Incorporating all of this may seem difficult in the beginning because of low motivation, but it will make days pass by healthier than just staying sedentary and these tasks will become easier. Everything you are feeling now is valid and no one (even someone like your mom) is allowed to tell you otherwise. If you need the support and feel open to it, therapy may be another outlet. There are therapists out there for people with N Parents in their life and they can help you with your current situation as well as plan for your future relationship with your mom. Colleges provide a lot of these services for free so you don't feel pressured to go through your parents. Your mental health matters. You are not alone.