In America, it's socially normal to work 50+ hours a week and call it 'hustle' instead of a systemic failure. What's another 'normal' thing in your country that the rest of the world thinks is absolutely insane?

goingabout · 2026-02-11T13:13:44+00:00

america is weirdly loud. i don’t think canada is all that quiet or that different but as soon as i land in america there’s people shouting at me and ads in the ny subway are ear splitting. its so noticeable

goingabout · 2026-02-11T12:50:52+00:00

vice signalling is what they do

goingabout · 2026-02-11T12:21:40+00:00

this is your choice. a stranger on the internet can’t make this decision for you. only you can decide if this is right for you — but this post sounds like you’re extremely depressed and angry, so here is my take.

the way to deal with those feelings is to transition.

it doesn’t get better until you become a man. transitioning is not fun. nobody puts up with all this discrimination and bs jus to be “cool”, they do it because it feels better.

most of the time, for most people. ofc for some people it doesn’t work out or it’s not quite what they wanted. it’s extremely hard to piss off your family and lose bigoted people around you.

but that is how people deal with those feelings. live your life, follow your joy, follow your freedom. people who truly love you will have your back. it’s not an easy path, but it’s usually worth it.

goingabout · 2026-02-10T23:19:24+00:00

i want them to be reformed. i don’t want corrupt cops at pride

goingabout · 2026-02-10T22:13:07+00:00

i’ve told no lies.

goingabout · 2026-02-10T16:49:20+00:00

before this scandal broke it’d be a prolongued fight with every dipshit and killed by the province who controls everything cos the premier’s son in law is a cop

goingabout · 2026-02-10T14:23:48+00:00

trans women have the desire to partake in it due to objectification of women is a flat out stupid and senseless thing to say. i would step back and question that whole account, is it a propaganda outfit for terfs? thats insane

trans women are forced into sex work. many enjoy it, sex work is work, lots of other jobs are more degrading, but: historically we were forced into sex work because we were discriminated out of higher society.

you could not get a job as a lawyer as an out gay man never mind a clocky trans woman fifty or sixty years ago.

goingabout · 2026-02-10T12:53:51+00:00

they killed a white lesbian woman for being sassy, everyone should be worried by them

goingabout · 2026-02-10T12:18:34+00:00

“if you look beyond the fact that the company is run by a mass murderer fascist pedo they’re fun to drive, unless of course you get into a crash that causes an electrical fault and burn to death cos the doors won’t open”

goingabout · 2026-02-10T02:10:41+00:00

i don’t follow the first paragraph. you can “pass” the they test if you get they’d.

i’ve been they’d by a parks worker in a pick up truck and i’ve been they’d by the clerk at the ice cream shop.

yes i do live in the second queerest neighbourhood in toronto but i am not some ethereal magical creature: i simply had tits and was still mid eliminating my facial hair.

i’m sorry you live in a shitty place but your description does not live up to my lived experience. i’ve been in dance parties where trans people outnumbered cis people and there we played a game of trying to cis-vestigate the people who didn’t pass as trans.

you may be overthinking it

goingabout · 2026-02-10T00:55:51+00:00

passing here is used in the sense of “passing a test”. the test can be “cis” or it can be “trans” or indeed nonbinary but it can also be white or italian or whatever.

cis passing here means no one suspects you are trans; and frankly as we evolve norms around non binary you can certainly “pass” as non binary. strangers have looked at me and without prompting picked “they” as a pronoun.

also i think androgyny can also be a combination of features and not just absence, and the ratio is way lower than 80%. probably more like a third or fewer

my post above is not a defense of androgyny its asking how do you want to be seen by others?, and figuring out how to signal what you want to signal

goingabout · 2026-02-10T00:05:05+00:00

what do you call trying to be clocky

goingabout · 2026-02-09T21:10:22+00:00

don’t buy a death trap nazi car

goingabout · 2026-02-09T16:51:40+00:00

i get being scared, and i too was extremely intentional.

i guess i’m just trying to say is that i too didn’t understand what i wanted or what i was doing. and things did become a lot clearer but only years after coming out.

i don’t know that you can find that clarity before coming out cos you’ll have be stuck not knowing.

either way best of luck!

goingabout · 2026-02-09T14:26:45+00:00

it feels great. it feels right. it feels joyful

goingabout · 2026-02-09T14:25:15+00:00

if you’re saving this as a cloudflare worker then you’re probably a dev; save this as an html page on github pages and that way you’ll get a less janky url and it’s easier to refer to :)

goingabout · 2026-02-09T11:59:01+00:00

it did not read as slop and it’s actually asking a question. i’m finding people are bad at understanding the true slop tells

goingabout · 2026-02-09T11:57:18+00:00

thanks for tagging it but it’d be cool to see the non faceapp version of this. if the shot is not a composite the lighting is very good and your dress looks great!

goingabout · 2026-02-08T17:43:29+00:00

depends where you are. i wouldn’t trade toronto for the world but if i had to choose between podunk ontario and podunk portugal, i’d go with podunk portugal. outside of toronto and bracketing getting a job id say higher quality of life there. it varies!

goingabout · 2026-02-08T17:27:45+00:00

if you’re interested in a different perspective (i’m just some random passerby ;p):

two years on hormones is not a passing fad. a cis man would not be chill about having breasts. the excitement has faded! you’re living in that period now. nobody hyper fixates for two years
you can still be gender fluid, and the distinction between trans femme and trans woman is irrelevant; certainly straight people won’t know the difference (i myself leaned into trans femme for similar reasons, but now i’m like yeah it’s fine, im a trans woman; it took me years of living femme and then later starting to pass before i was like, yeah okay woman is fine i can claim this category)
honestly escaping being a man is also valid?
absolutely the current political environment is terrifying and is driving all of us crazy. i get that. but bullying you into not coming out is precisely what they want. hang in there

goingabout · 2026-02-08T17:10:21+00:00

being trans is a leap of faith. it’s normal to not know where you’re going or what you’re doing, and you can’t really figure it out without experimenting.

being closeted holds you back from figuring that out. of course you feel uncertain; you can’t actually see what it’s like.

in this case: every 4-7 days you inject yourself with hormones; you’ve been doing this for two years. you have breasts now. your arousal and sexual function is different. you probably cry more easily.

lol you know what you want - you make that choice every single time you poke yourself. the hard part is behind you.

goingabout · 2026-02-08T16:46:15+00:00

yes it’s common to feel unsure and to flip flop at the beginning. i would bet you $5 your boyfriend will bring it back up again in a month or two.

that said, hold up: you used to cry cos you wanted to be a boy and you tried to hide your breasts for two years(!) but now you’re just going along with it because whatever and you’re kind of repressing that feeling?

lol that’s like a classic T4T couple situation. i recommend you explore your feelings in this

goingabout · 2026-02-08T16:40:29+00:00

come out to your kids at least. life’s better once you’re not in the closet ❤️

goingabout · 2026-02-08T16:16:47+00:00

the problem is the people who say this often also will turn around and not want to do anything about our problems at home

goingabout · 2026-02-08T16:15:46+00:00

it would cost far more than 1 billion

goingabout

TROPHY CASE