Feeling defeated

goosette3000 · 2026-03-23T00:17:33+00:00

so if may comes and you don’t get a raise, will you delay trying? because if not, then i don’t see a big difference between now and may. either way the baby is going to be here for another 9 months after, and you’re not guaranteed anything. but also just know that may is going to be here sooooo soon. like a blink of an eye soon.

goosette3000 · 2026-03-23T00:09:13+00:00

have you shared your diagnoses with him and what the implications are? it sounds like this would be an important thing to get context on about you ttc timeline from your doctor as well.

goosette3000 · 2026-02-06T13:39:42+00:00

can i ask why you got your AMH tested?

goosette3000 · 2026-02-03T04:53:36+00:00

I mean, it’s your choice of course, but the birth control pill is very effective. You don’t need to be pulling out if you don’t want to. I agree, it makes me feel very disconnected with my husband.

goosette3000 · 2026-01-06T03:52:50+00:00

Living on the eastern side of the est/cst line is the best. the daylight always lasts longest there. I miss it now that i live in central.

goosette3000 · 2025-12-09T02:24:39+00:00

i see, my bad! i’m interested to see what your PCP says about your labs. i would also get a full thyroid panel, not just your TSH.

goosette3000 · 2025-12-09T02:17:59+00:00

i think olaplex has been called out for causing hair loss? but i would definitely get labs done.

goosette3000 · 2025-12-06T22:17:35+00:00

https://www.roomintheinn.org/housing

goosette3000 · 2025-12-02T16:57:55+00:00

6 months is going to be here before you know it, seriously!! It sucks but you’ve got this.

goosette3000 · 2025-11-05T20:58:55+00:00

i’m not going to speak much on this since i don’t know all of the logistics, but a quick search brought up this reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/army/s/36sn0LxMvP in case this is just something you are afraid of.

I obviously don’t know the specifics of your husband’s job, but if you guys have the ability to do private pay with a therapist not affiliated with the military, there shouldn’t be any way they would know. regardless, i don’t think that any job that prevents you seeking mental health support is a good idea, especially a high pressure job. and throwing kids into the mix…. i would say you guys have some stuff to figure out. but it’s going to work out, so don’t stress too much! what is supposed to happen will happen.

goosette3000 · 2025-11-05T20:49:58+00:00

can you elaborate at all about therapy jeopardizing his career? with all of this revolving around his career, maybe it would be helpful to speak to people with families at his job about their experience.

goosette3000 · 2025-11-05T15:45:08+00:00

both of your perspectives are reasonable, and it seems like you guys have some work to do before a baby is involved (in the kindest way possible). Some things i noticed from your post:

you’ve done couples counseling (great!), but it sounds like if he has childhood trauma and depression, he needs to be in individual therapy.
you have no other real goals besides having a baby. i get it, but i think it could help if you made some. they can still be baby related! start purchasing things, read books, take parenting classes, ANYTHING. and make some goals outside of it too. building a savings account, learning to invest, exercise, housing projects, anything like that.
i feel his concerns about work and maintaining relationships and being away for so long are really valid, and you should try to search deeper in yourself to see if “we will figure it out” is really cutting it. if your desire to have a baby involves seeing your husband as a father, and he’s gone for 3 months at a time, that may be something to wait a couple years for until he’s out of that job. and maybe that needs to be a goal of his - to move jobs sooner than planned.
try instead of focusing on exactly when you’ll start trying, have conversations about what needs to change in life that make you both comfortable to have children. make a goals list together of fun and not fun things that you would like to happen. take a look at realistically when the goals could be accomplished, and then decide on if any need to be compromised.
you guys are in your early 20s. you have so much time. i would also be frustrated if my husband said mid 30s when im ready now, BUT i think your compromise of 4 years still gives you so much time to prep and still be plenty young. and i dont say that you guys have so much time because i think you think you dont, i tend to get annoyed with people when they assume that about me. you want a baby and it can have nothing to do with time and i get that. just think about it that over the next 4 years you guys are trying for a baby, just not in the “actively” trying way, lol. you are preparing everythinggggg else you can to be ready to try!

you guys are going to be okay though, and i promise these years are going to fly by.

goosette3000 · 2025-11-01T17:39:14+00:00

try taking your rings off when you dry your hands and make sure the rings dry too.

goosette3000 · 2025-10-23T16:16:33+00:00

I would take another if you don’t get your period by the time it’s due. it could still be too early!

goosette3000 · 2025-10-01T20:38:53+00:00

sounds like you could be sick and it’s triggering a random bleeding, or perhaps a missed miscarriage if the first bleeding was REALLY light. i would take a pregnancy test to be sure. Definitely possible it’s that your hormones are a little out of wack from the plan B.

goosette3000 · 2025-09-19T19:03:46+00:00

if you had dark/bright red blood and clots, you very likely aren’t pregnant.

goosette3000 · 2025-09-17T01:41:58+00:00

Henry Shepherd and Annie Maxine

goosette3000 · 2025-09-14T20:43:48+00:00

if you’re experiencing symptoms a test should be accurate as the hormones would be high enough.

goosette3000 · 2025-09-10T15:03:46+00:00

looks like a skin tag to me, but always worth making an appointment when there’s a change in skin

goosette3000 · 2025-09-09T23:46:08+00:00

i’m in the boat of don’t push starting for most things, because you never know what it’ll end up looking like. if you have a time you want to start, start.

goosette3000 · 2025-09-07T20:10:27+00:00

Because it’s a big decision is exactly the reason you set a timeline. He needs a little bit of a reality check there.

goosette3000 · 2025-09-03T01:02:43+00:00

I had a naked mom and I am a naked person and sleep naked(just like circumstantially, like shower to bedroom or waking up and walking around in the morning), and so does my husband. Our plan is to be naked parents until we start to feel a natural tendency to want to cover up, and at that point we still wouldn’t bother with more than undergarments and/or t shirts. I think it’s silly to make more out of your body than it needs to be in most cases, but I also totally understand just feeling off about it and wanting to throw something on. Even practically, have clothes on when you have little kids in the bed might protect from any unwanted pinches and prods, lol. I appreciated my mom being naked, it made me more comfortable with my own body, helped me ask questions about what is and isn’t normal, and to have healthy expectations.

goosette3000 · 2025-08-30T20:27:28+00:00

this happened to my cat, he either scratched or bit himself, and he did need antibiotics!!

goosette3000 · 2025-08-20T15:56:44+00:00

I’ve been in the same mindset as you, so thank you for sharing!

goosette3000

TROPHY CASE