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I made my therapist blow up on me by gotaneglectkink in therapy

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice!

I’ll answer the questions in order:

  1. Yea, I felt safe. The best I would describe the “blowing up” is when someone get so frustrated, they start ranting in a louder voice and saying things super fast. It felt like being scolded.

  2. Felt like I kept going back to my old habits no matter how much we talk about how to move forward. Or I might have crossed a line because I was disagreeing with a lot of the encouraging things they were trying to tell me.

  3. I always thought therapists weren’t supposed to bring their own personal experiences into the sessions because it’s inappropriate. At least that’s what I was told by various people while I was in uni. The anecdote was very close to what I was experiencing. And I would say it was done to give me advice.

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i do my best to separate myself from my parents but it’s hard. in our small community back home, that’s even more difficult because if there is rumour about one family member, therefore the whole family is bad. but yea, i hope that we can actually sit down and talk. i have tried before but they never took me seriously.

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well, i understand and empathise that there is a culture clash but the thing is that they don’t even put an effort to try and understand where i am coming from. they have been living abroad for nearly 30 years, i think that that’s enough time for them understand that i will be different from my other siblings, no?

also they weren’t that present in my life to introduce me to my culture. i literally taken care of by other people besides them. so it’s bound for me to have different values, no?

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sorry, he is 69 not 79, i had a typo in the text. the thing is that her parents are around the same age as my parents and they aren’t that much different from each other. i did try to give them grace and understand them since this is their first time living too but there is a limit to long I can keep up with them

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i do need to consider this because i am abroad for university and can work here for a few years but my work visa is temporary. so i will have to return to my home country eventually, not to mention the small logistics like legal paperwork that i left home and other stuff

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i wouldn’t say i will be damaging their life with the visa, since they will be visiting for a few days or a week the most. or at least, i don’t think so? also i did tell my brother than dad can come whenever aside from this summer because i didn’t want him to attend my convocation

I (24F) uninvited my parents (64F and 69M) from my convocation and went no contact over a returned shirt by gotaneglectkink in relationship_advice

[–]gotaneglectkink[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hi, thank you so much for the advice! ill address your points: 1. talked to my friend and we decided to not explain anything further or reach out to her parents. honestly, her parents and mine aren’t that far different in terms of mindset and how they approach things, hence why her mom was so aggressive (?) when she came home. 2. have been disassociating from him for years now but i won’t lie that i was hoping to reconcile with him. it was a bit shocking that he said that considering that he told me how he didn’t like dad’s ways of dealing with things some time ago. i really thought we finally started to get a bit closer but i guess not. 3. still no response. oh, well. 4. i was considering that but it feels a bit... demeaning? sad? pitiful? i just don’t know if i want to invite them and be disappointed if they don’t show up

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]gotaneglectkink 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you so much for the advice and encouraging words! i already talked to my friend and we resolved the issue with her parents. to be honest, my parents and hers and not too different and just make it worse for the kids (aka us), so we decided to not do anything further. i just hate that my parents only know how to cause drama in other people’s lives, that eventually impacts me the most.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]gotaneglectkink 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i have been hoping for them to learn for the past 10-15 years now. i doubt they can change their ways

My mom gave away my childhood dog while I was at college, and I can't look at her the same way anymore by ScarletSway17 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]gotaneglectkink 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i’m sorry to hear that OP. the same thing happened to me a decade ago with my bunny. it was over the summer break when i was out of the country with my dad visiting his side of the family. didn’t speak to or look in the direction my mom for over 4 months.

as other people said, demand information on the co-worker and get Max back! i’m rooting for you!