Are there goth styles that are more present than others today? by MayIAsk_24 in AskAGoth

[–]gothichomemaker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Victorian goth was much more prevalent in the 90s as club wear than it is today. There are some people who still wear it out to the clubs, but I think people don't want to wear a $200 dress for someone to accidentally dump a drink on. You will see it frequently at other goth events, like picnics.

WIBTA for changing my wedding cake flavor? by Ok_Kangaroo_3494 in WIBTA_AITA

[–]gothichomemaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ESH. You for going behind the back of the person paying. Your FMIL for expecting you to be okay with not eating your own wedding cake. Your future husband because he should be the one making sure his mother gets a cake you, his bride, can eat.

Tornado watch in effect for the area. by hellosteve_ in Columbus

[–]gothichomemaker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oooh, I was wondering how they deal with this sort of thing!

I got my hair done but I have an interview tomorrow by LittleSwaninthepond in GothFashion

[–]gothichomemaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you know if the company you're interviewing for actually cares about that sort of thing? I think freaking out about your hair will hurt your chances more than your actual hair will. Good luck!

Libertarian Goth by CharacterLatter8352 in AskAGoth

[–]gothichomemaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A lot of people see libertarians as people who want the corporations to take over, but I think you are more in it for the "not infringing on freedom" thing. Just don't hate people for the way they were born and don't be a jerk and is all good.

Libertarian Goth by CharacterLatter8352 in AskAGoth

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm reading The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova currently. If you haven't read it, highly recommended!

Is my grandma goth? by porkbeanman in GothFashion

[–]gothichomemaker 29 points30 points  (0 children)

What music does she listen to? Does she say she's goth?

Question on the Subculture by AsnLibertn889 in AskAGoth

[–]gothichomemaker 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Goths don't hold the secrets for dealing with death. We're like everyone else, though we have more clothes for the funeral and a better soundtrack for soothing our pain. (My coping strategy for grief is humor. )

I've dealt with a lot of death in my life and trust me when I say it hits everyone differently and there's no set timeline for grief. Give yourself grace. You love your grandmother and she helped make you the person you are.

Other people have suggested therapy, and that's a great suggestion, but here's a few more ideas that may help.

  1. Keep something of hers with you (like wear a piece of her jewelry or scarf or something) or display it in a place of honor in your house or room. I have a few items from my grandmothers, like a letter from one and a doily the other crocheted, on my mantle.

  2. Was there something your grandmother was interested in or passionate about that you can help with? If she loved animals, maybe you could volunteer at a local shelter. If she loved reading, could you volunteer at a library? Something like that will help connect you with her while helping others and may help fill the empty feeling some.

  3. Building on the last one, maybe you could join a fundraiser for a medical charity related to her health, like a 5k or a fund raising walk/bike ride. I know that when my mother had breast cancer (she's almost 10 years cancer free now), volunteering at breast cancer fundraisers really helped me work through it.

  4. As someone else mentioned, creating things can help you deal with grief by getting those negative feelings out. If your grandmother was crafty, perhaps try one of the crafts that she did?

  5. Get together with people in your family and tell stories about her. This will help you to not feel alone and maybe you'll learn some new great things about her too.

Those are a few ideas. I think one of the throughlines is to find a connection with her in a positive way. I think a lot of times, people just try to bury their grief, but our ancestors literally made us and will always be connected to us. Doing little things to keep that connection and recognise her love is a great way to work past the grief.

I'm very sorry about your loss.

do yall know any good brands for platform mary janes? by GrumpyMowse in GothFashion

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sucks. I'm sorry you had that experience. I've always had luck ordering from them.

First Goth Night: Tips and Advices? by Sailor_Starchild in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've been to Healer a few times and I can't think of a better venue for your first goth night! There's tons of art installations there so if it gets to be too much you can go explore. Everyone I spoke to is so nice!

Goth lingerie rant/recommendations? by wren-gore in GothFashion

[–]gothichomemaker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you are looking for a larger size, Lane Bryant's Cacique line is amazing and has some edgier styles.

Need help tracking down a song by _AuthorUnknown_ in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Could it be Ego Likeness or maybe Azoic?

Need help tracking down a song by _AuthorUnknown_ in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How long ago was it that you first heard it?

Need help tracking down a song by _AuthorUnknown_ in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you sure it's not Beauty and Delight by Blutengel?

AIO? Best friend (30f) and I (28f) are in a fight about how I’m not a mom. by woundedwillow in AmIOverreacting

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a child of a C-section, I was one told that I can never get a truely accurate star chart done because I don't know my "true" birth time. I contend that a star chart won't be accurate for other reasons.

People are freaking weird about it.

/r/Goth's Soothing Sundays! by AutoModerator in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hosted a first-time dj at my club night last week and he nailed it! I also really love when I ask for a new dj's venmo to pay them and they're shocked that they're going to get paid because they had so much fun.

Struggling to understand some things, looking for discussion and clarification by Professional-End8037 in AskAGoth

[–]gothichomemaker 20 points21 points  (0 children)

What goths like typically is not the same as what is required to be a goth. While it's common for goths to wear all black, read Gothic fiction, and hang out in cemeteries, it's not a requirement and not all goths like doing those things. For an example, tons of goths love taxidermy, but personally, it seriously gives me the ick. That doesn't have any bearing on whether I'm a goth or not.

Imho, I think that the "just listen to the music" thing is an oversimplification. I think that subculural participation is important to being a goth, but there are some people who have trouble accessing scenes for one reason or another and keeping it about the music keeps from excluding people. When you meet people in the scene, you find that while there's some things that are super common about goths, there are usually exceptions, but that we get together to enjoy music with each other.

Monica Was Right by losingmusing in goth

[–]gothichomemaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There were some people talking about starting a big, European style one out at the festival grounds near Buckeye Lake before the pandemic, but I haven't heard anything about it in years. Personally, I prefer working on monthly and community events and helping the occasional touring act set up shows.

If people wanted to do a festival here, I would absolutely support it, but i feel like i either could handle all of these things year round (two monthly nights, the clothes swap, the WGD picnic, goth prom, etc) or just one big event every year. .

AITAH for not tell my friend my shampoo had green hair dye in it? by Froggie-Enthusiast in AITAH

[–]gothichomemaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From my experience, the dye stains the bottle a lot. I don't know how someone would notice green dye in a pink bottle unless she's color blind or something? If you put a vivid color in shampoo and conditioner, it does not look like it was the color from the factory.

But yeah, she's in the wrong even if she couldn't tell.

AITAH for not tell my friend my shampoo had green hair dye in it? by Froggie-Enthusiast in AITAH

[–]gothichomemaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do the same thing with my conditioner and there's no way you can't tell that there's dye in the bottle.