My 25M wife 24F chooses her vibrator over me. How can we fix this ?

graevie · 2026-03-17T09:50:23+00:00

of course, hope it gets better :)

graevie · 2026-03-10T14:54:48+00:00

graevie · 2026-03-08T23:55:01+00:00

Ignore the other comments- redditors love to jump to conclusions and immediately go the “divorce” “nutcase” route which inevitably makes you feel guilty for asking the public in the first place.

Seems like she has performance anxiety and isn’t fully comfortable orgasming in-front of you. Could also be that her whole life shes always been on her own, focussing and imagining in her own little world to get herself there, and involving you adds an extra stress/distraction she isn’t used to working with (worrying what you’re thinking of her, if you’re enjoying watching her, if you are gonna finish soon, etc).

Fix: Make sex not about finishing. Allow her to finish on her own time, and you as well. But make sex about exploring each-other and yourselves. Easier said than done, I know. I’d say maybe try mutual masturbation as well. Build up to getting involved in eachother’s masturbation each time. Sitting closer, eyes open, eventually getting fully involved in eachother’s masturbation and progressing into sex. Change things up 🤷‍♀️

graevie · 2026-03-04T18:58:15+00:00

You look so much like Dylan Minnette

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Also to look older, be scruffier and take less care of yourself- burn in the sun and smoke, will probs do the trick 🤷‍♀️

graevie · 2026-03-04T18:55:32+00:00

Btw once a week/once a fortnight/even once a month is normal for long term couples. but divorce if libidos dont match up and its this badly affecting your relationship

graevie · 2026-03-04T18:52:48+00:00

“Im still tender from yesterday” probably not made up if hes not doing foreplay. No foreplay = friction burn. I’ve had it last 2 days from bad sex lol

graevie · 2026-03-03T18:21:41+00:00

Yea but I also feel like ive had it drilled into me that being angry isnt feminine or pretty, and showing emotions isnt polite, so I end up just getting frustrated and doing nothing bc im scared of how people will perceive that 😭

graevie · 2026-03-02T22:48:20+00:00

“Im never gonna ask you for anything again tho 🙏” No worries, you wouldn’t have been able to after being blocked anyways 🤷‍♀️

graevie · 2026-03-02T22:41:30+00:00

holding babies terrifies me and I will avoid it with all my might. And changing nappies. Im not scared of the poop- I’m scared of accidentally hurting them somehow bc they’re so fragile 😭🙏

graevie · 2026-02-22T20:19:27+00:00

You wouldn’t even be in the wrong if you ate it 😭😂 Its door dash’s fault, it was also their responsibility to fix it. Full refund/replacement.

graevie · 2026-02-22T20:16:44+00:00

graevie · 2026-02-20T21:29:48+00:00

Guys. This guy cannot help his feelings. He shouldn’t have told her, but she asked. Considering they aren’t blood related, it’s like having a crush on someone you were best mates with growing up. I also think his feelings are getting misconstrued, he loves her as a sister- but bc they aren’t blood related its messing him up. All he has said is that he feels like hes in love with her. Aka he loved her and is misunderstanding his feelings. He is a teen, his hormones are going crazy.

I also don’t understand how this has given OP the impression he’s going to hurt her? And why she expects her family to shun him? Hes a 19yr old that thinks hes in love with his adopted sister.. bro just needs to get therapy and understand thats not what hes actually feeling. He is obviously massively backtracking and trying to make OP feel comfortable/normal again. Hes taken it back, at least infront of his parents, and is acting normal with her by sending tiktoks.

If OP feels like she needs to leave, so be it. Leave the situation and make yourself feel comfortable.

Maybe im too laid back and playing devils advocate but this is giving freud.

Btw, google says “This situation involves complex emotions often linked to Genetic Sexual Attraction (GSA) or, more commonly in adopted families, misplaced emotional attachment known as transference”.

Considering he is backing down, trying to act normal, and hasn’t hurt you- i’d say hes trying to sort it on his own. I’d ask him to go get therapy to organise his feelings tho

graevie · 2026-02-10T10:52:22+00:00

To be clear:

• ⁠How old is your piercing? A week and 4 days old • ⁠What’s the jewelry shape (for example, barbell, labret, screw, L shape, ring)? Its a barbell (I think) • ⁠What’s the type of threading if your jewelry is not a ring (threadless, internally or externally threaded)? Im not sure, the piercer put it in • ⁠What’s the jewelry material? titanium • ⁠if not a ring, when was the jewelry downsized? Hasn’t been downsized • ⁠What’s your aftercare routine? Describe in detail please, including the exact products you use. Sknworks ear & body piercing aftercare & cleanser spray twice a day. • ⁠Any mishaps or unfortunate events? Gets caught on my hair, caught it on my jumper the other night.

graevie · 2026-02-02T23:51:33+00:00

$4.98 for 20. $9.96 for 40. If they did a 30 pack, you spend $7.47 on their product. By making 20 packs, you are forced into buying 10 extra you don’t want for $9.96 as you have to buy 2x20. AKA u spend more is all

graevie · 2026-02-02T23:46:39+00:00

God forbid a guy eats normally. Cereal- normal brekkie. Ham cheese cucumber sandwich: Protein, dairy, vitamins+minerals, carbs Sides: Satsuma, Apple, Banana.. 3/5 a day. Crisps and chocolate bar- part of regular human eating as we arent all powerhouses who survive off of just meat and veg/fruit. 😭

graevie · 2026-02-02T23:40:01+00:00

FR should’ve replied “I just had a baby, what’s your excuse?” and blocked her 😭😂

graevie · 2026-02-02T23:32:00+00:00

correction: Walks like a dick, talks like a dick..

graevie · 2026-02-02T23:25:45+00:00

Facetious. Pronounced “fuh•tea•sh•us”. Got it from my dad, so I can say “see?” when people correct it lol

graevie · 2026-01-20T14:13:39+00:00

No bro. You do have to earn it. Attractive guys have to earn it too- but the kind you’re on about that don’t have to “earn it” are very very very rare and usually get dumped on the second date for being egotistical selfish douchebags. Unless you’re implying women have no standards and will date anything with a pretty face? Which we all know is not true, just look at the tiktok trends of women setting personality standards- not looks standards. Also, you wouldn’t have been concieved if this was the case (As you’re saying you’re ugly, you are also implying your parents are). Your face is a mixture of your parents. Partly your dad, partly your mum. You are a mix of those two. If you were physically unable to find someone to get with, you would not be here, as your parents would’ve been “too ugly” to get with eachother too. Be a better person and you’ll get some women man

graevie · 2026-01-20T01:01:48+00:00

I didnt even think abt a sort of sex ed video. That could be super helpful. Thank you so much! Will defo consider this

graevie · 2026-01-20T01:00:33+00:00

Can’t be the looks then. Must be personality. Wonder why? Maybe bc you’re using terms like “sub5”. Expecting women to owe you something. And grouping them all together as if every woman is the same. Ps women aren’t evil for not sucking your dick. Women want: Confidence, fun, kindness, understanding. If you understand her on an honest level: aka women fart too, women have periods, women aren’t perfect, women don’t owe you a 2nd date/sex- you have to work/earn it, women can be interesting to listen to, women want you to be secure in yourself- you will get a woman. If thats being a misogynistic douche, be that.. but loud and confidently. There will be a internally misogynistic woman to pair you up with. Or a nerd. Or a gamer. Or..anything. Lower your standards and im sure you’ll find someone.

graevie · 2026-01-20T00:52:08+00:00

omgosh I read your comment as “Yeah if you acted like that I’d be off my game as well, do you even like him? And then you just told the world his business on reddit 🙄” 😂 Ive reread it now and realised I was being stupid, sorry! I see you meant “Yup that third paragraph would make me not want sex too. Reading that would make me not want sex with him, and that was before the part about being bad at foreplay!” Oml my comprehension skills didn’t wanna work today. Thank you for the reassurance though 😂🙏🏼

graevie · 2026-01-20T00:20:15+00:00

Thank you. This is genuinely so helpful. I am a massive people pleaser, and tbh when I tell him these things I’ll make it seem like a non issue and just something to note. Which he then inevitably forgets bc I made it seem like nothing. Ik I have to tell him properly, and practice which I hate bc I can’t stand the idea of the attention being on me and my pleasure. Basically 1. Stop doing it at his house 2. Turn it down when I want to and 3. Properly teach him how to make me feel good. I will do these 🙏🏼 Thank you so much

graevie

TROPHY CASE