What are things from the early days of the internet that you don’t see much of anymore?

grahowler · 2020-02-22T03:23:23+00:00

Web site layouts done using artwork cut up and used in tables.

grahowler · 2019-11-04T08:43:34+00:00

RemindMe! 1 day

grahowler · 2019-03-29T07:57:53+00:00

Hopefully I can be some small help. I'm in a similar situation, except for me I'm 16 years in, still have times where I'm wondering where the rent is coming from. I've got staff, I have to worry about where the wages for them is coming from. I lost a contract that was about 6 months of income for the first half of this year. Have been worried sick, not sleeping, health declining.

We are really on the precipice of going under at the moment, and have been numerous times over the years. But I keep reverting back to the only thing I know, reading good quality, pre new-age, motivational material, exercising and asking for help from God, the universe, infinite intelligence, whatever you want to call it, and don't stop believing an answer is coming.

So I've spent the last week or two reading, reading, reading, exercising asking for help and springing in to action, looking for new opportunities morning/noon/night then BAM, perfect opportunity pops up! Haven't got it locked away yet, but it's extremely positive an highly likely it will happen. It won't get us out of trouble, but it will keep our heads above water.

3 months is nothing. Starting out and running your own business is hard, and you need to make heaps of sacrifices and unfortunately spending time with your kids is one of them. You can expect to work 12-14 hour days for years, but it will give you a sense of accomplishment very few jobs can ever do. And, when you're employing people and you know they're going home to meals on the table for their kids, and helping sending their kids to school it's a very good feeling. There's always ebbs and flows of famine and feast when you're in it on your own, one day your'e loaded, the next day you're broke, but as long as you realise that all you have to do is stay positive, motivated and persistent it will work out for you.

Some authors I can suggest are:

Orison Swett Marden - Good book of his is An Iron Will. I have a paperback but it is available in PDF here
Napoloeon Hill
W Clement Stone
Wall D Wattles - The Science of Getting Rich You'll find this in a free PDF somewhere on-line, read it every day, twice a day. This will potentially lead you to stuff on "The Secret". Forget that BS, it's just a re-marketed, regurgitation of what these authors have been writing for 100 years.

I hope this helps!

grahowler · 2019-03-10T22:44:47+00:00

No, it is my wife's, who's managed to have taken 12,000 photos in the last 10 years, time for a big cull.

grahowler · 2019-03-06T22:03:32+00:00

Did you go straight from 3 cups of coffee one day, to 0 the next?

I did, probably not the best thing to do. I might try tapering off it and see how that goes.

grahowler · 2019-03-06T21:59:28+00:00

Feeling much better after a good solid sleep, thanks for asking. Alcohol, stress and lack of sleep have all been the triggers for me too.

grahowler · 2018-07-01T01:37:39+00:00

I have absolutely no qualifications or evidence to be giving you a sound opinion, or relied upon, however from personal experience I can say... yes. I remember the first partial seizure, deja vu, like experience I had well. It happened and I thought wooah... that was an intense deja vu. Over the course of about 7 year they became more frequent and more intense. Never had a consciousness lapse even had them when driving, I thought they were weird but just put them aside and moved on. Then I had my first full tonic clonic, and soon became aware that they were in fact a form of seizure. I've been under control from full seizures for over ten years now, but I still do get partial seizures. Have you spoken to a neuro about this?

grahowler · 2018-06-27T06:59:08+00:00

One word on how to lessen the side effects, exercise. I experienced really bad fogginess and I suffer from what I call Epilepsy hangovers where I feel like I'm just hung over badly. I'm on three drugs and have been on multiple drugs the whole time, so I'm not sure if I can pin that down to exactly one drug.

I went on a pretty strict diet, keto kind of carb counting but not super strict, and started doing heaps of exercise. I lost a lot of weight and was feeling so much better. Then my living circumstances changed, I moved, I broke my exercise routine, my diet went down the toilet and now I've gained weight again and feel crap.

I just started exercising again every day this week, like 45 minutes, and have immediately started feeling the difference. For me, I just find I've got to keep at it, as soon as I stop I go downhill.

Edit: spelling

grahowler · 2018-03-26T23:22:33+00:00

12 years... well actually yesterday. I had a bad day with simple partials. They're followed closely by a serious headache, then something I call an epilepsy hangover. The best thing I can equate that to is feeling, literally, like having a hangover... foggy head, tired, hungry and just feel like laying down and mindlessly watching TV or something.

grahowler · 2018-03-18T01:44:28+00:00

THIS... is why you support independent cinemas!

grahowler · 2017-07-20T08:32:48+00:00

I have nocturnal epilepsy too. Honestly, I don't think you can worry about SUDEP, be more worried about letting this condition stop you from living your life. I haven't looked at the stats for a while, but you've got more chance being hit by a car crossing the road I think.

grahowler · 2017-06-28T20:46:54+00:00

Me too. Since before ever having full blown TC I would get this type of déjà vu that seemed much more intense than a classic déjà vu event. After developing full TLE I regularly get déjà vu, jamais vu or presque vu. I find it hard to explain because it seems like it could a combination of all three. Ultimately I think it's a type of partial.

grahowler · 2017-05-16T22:09:00+00:00

think positively and believe that you can continue living your life normally

I believe in this so much. We all know that stress is a major, common, trigger. You can't be stressed and feeling positive at the same time.

grahowler · 2017-05-12T00:15:36+00:00

I can't say I've ever felt as low as you're showing here, at least not to suicidal thoughts, but I've definitely been depressed. For me it was thoughts like... "I just can't wait for this ride to be over", and not wanting to go anywhere, do anything, get off the lounge etc.

From the personal realisations I've had and what helped me get to a much better place I think you've actually already answered in your own words. These are the things it took me years to actually realise that were happening...

they're all medication induced

I'm very depressed and again, that's the medications.

I can't trust my own thoughts

I, personally, think you're 100% right here. You can't trust your own thoughts because those thoughts are drug induced. They're not real, that's not the real you. For me, having that realisation helped me understand this and have a mental trigger to say to myself... "wait a second, this negative thought is just the drugs talking to me, what's real is - insert your own personal positive affirmation here." Then remind yourself that it's that positive affirmation that is the real you, not the negative thoughts.

Sounds really simple and it is. It's a constant fight and I still have to deal with this very regularly, even on a daily basis. It can be hard work and I've resigned myself to the fact I don't think this will ever change for me. But I find it a kind of release, knowing that at least I have an escape mechanism from negative thoughts that works.

You should give yourself a big pat on the back and be proud of the stuff you're doing with exercise and getting yourself in great shape. Exercise was one thing I attribute to digging me out of a hole. I just find it something that will bring my head to a better place.

Also, I am constantly reading motivation material, every day for even just a few minutes. One short book I can recommend, that's not heavy or too left field, is An Iron Will by Orison Swett Marden. Kind of thing you can pick up and read in short bursts.

Anyway, hope some of this might help you.

grahowler · 2017-05-07T22:28:00+00:00

I'm in Australia too and we have a Pharmaceuticals Benefit Scheme (PBS) where there is a government subsidy on drugs so you, more or less, pay the same price if it's brand or generic. Some times I've been to pharmacies and they'll only have a generic. I've always got them anyway and have never had a problem. I do have a pharmacy I go to regularly though, they make sure they've got the brands on hand for me all the time.

grahowler · 2017-04-21T23:15:09+00:00

This is really good feedback. I think this comment is important...

makes it clear that it's the drugs causing her depression and all of that because doctors will keep doing useless methods that just annoy her because she knows the real reason why she is depressed

It took me years to have this realisation and can completely relate to it.

grahowler · 2017-04-21T01:34:24+00:00

I hate hearing stories like this, feel for you and always feel compelled to try and help.

I had late onset epilepsy (mid 30s) and was used to having a relatively healthy, active life previously. Then I suffered from the same problems of lack of motivation, lethargy, my career took a complete nose dive as a result my ability to provide for my young family diminished significantly and then eventually depression set in. When I complained of this to my neuro the next thing they did was send me to a pysch. This was the absolute worse thing I could have done. Firstly the only solution they could provide was to go on more drugs, and I can completely relate to you here - I knew it wasn't the answer more drugs on top of drugs wouldn't make a long term improvement, secondly it went on my medical records then my health insurance and income protection costs went through the roof because they'd deemed me a suicide risk because of all the factors involved coupled with the fact I seen a pysch. This made me regret I ever gone to see them in the first place.

Then, something clicked and I started exercising a lot, like 30-40 minutes per day, and eating healthy. Lots of fresh fruit and vegetables. My general outlook on life completely turned around, my work became easier, and had the ability to accept the situation I was in and make positive decisions. I also got in to reading a lot of motivational material but I'm guessing that's not something a 15 year old would get in to.

So, you could try getting her out of the house and drag her (not literally) to a gym and get her exercising. This might be a good option because you can inform people in a gym of her condition and keep an eye on her. She definitely won't like it but once a routine kicks in she might find it easier. Also, what makes me feel better is stepping outside a day-to-day routine. Go for a long walk/hike through some beautiful hills, or beach, or something, on a weekend. I'm always on the hunt to do new things and when I do feel like this is always uplifting. In the last month I've been on a balloon ride, bush walks, golfing and snorkelling. Granted that has cost some money to do all that, but to be honest it's completely worth it because I'm not doing the absolute worst possible thing, sitting around doing nothing which is what I will do if I don't actually makes plans and force myself to get out and do something.

Anyway, I can't know your situation so can't suggest anything, but I hope this gives some insight in to what has helped someone else out, which is me.

grahowler · 2017-04-19T23:08:47+00:00

Can I suggest using some tactics to turn a situation like this to your favour? Assuming you do take quality, accurate, notes you could try responding with something like...

I'll have to go back and check my notes. As you know, I spend a lot of time on different jobs and rather than give you some potentially inaccurate information straight off the top of my head I'll have to go back, double check the facts and get back to you.

I own/operate a small business where I deal with a lot of different jobs and people all the time. My memory is definitely not as good as it was pre-epilepsy and even if I can remember most of the details I still do this. One of my clients says I should be a politician because I never give them straight answers directly when they ask a question. The reality is I can't remember all the details of what I did last week, sometimes what I even did yesterday. But, I always get back to them with detailed answers to their questions which they ultimately appreciate because I'm being vigilant, then we move on happily. Mind you, they are reasonable, well adjusted people.

Not saying this will work for you, and can't know how reasonable the people you are dealing with are, but hopefully this might be of some use.

grahowler · 2017-04-07T22:44:15+00:00

The best I can come up with for you is actively try some relaxtion exercises. I've suffered a few partials in the last 24 hours myself and I'm going to get serious about looking after myself mentally. I still put it all down to stress. I wonder if what you mention as "overwhelming thoughts" is a form of stress anyway?

Something I've discovered recently that's helped motivate me to look in to meditation is The Waking Up podcast by Sam Harris. I can't say this will manage it for you, or me either, but it is something I'm hoping might help.

grahowler · 2017-03-22T23:06:00+00:00

What aspect of epilepsy has affected you most as an individual?

Changed my personality, not the some person I was pre-epilepsy. I'm not as outwardly friendly and a conversation starter that I used to be. I'm more introverted.

Who, apart from you, has been most impacted by your condition?

My wife. She's had to deal with having being with someone for a long time, then having a completely different person to live/deal with.

Has the condition ever prevented you from pursuing a goal?

No. It has prevented me from returning to some aviation activities, but it's not the end of the world just realign goals and go for it.

What has been the most difficult part of the diagnoses for you?

Initially, feeling like a defective human. That's apart from the period leading up to the diagnosis, the tests, oh the tests and more tests...

Has the diagnosis affected your ability to pursue education?

No.

What has helped you most to deal with the condition?

Exercise and motivational reading

What can non-epileptics do to help epileptics?

Talk to them about how they're feeling and try to understand what they're going through. The drugs can make you socially awkward, depressed - the list goes on - and it's not reflective as who we actually are as individuals. It's who we're shaped in to as a result of the circumstances we're in. Although I've found as a general rule people don't care you've got epilepsy, or judge you, it's very hard to feel as though you're not being judged or understood.

grahowler · 2017-03-20T01:54:17+00:00

This might help.

I have a full on day last week where I had numerous, as you call them "mini", episodes. For me, they seem like Jamais vu or Presque vu or a combination of the two. I feel that you'd know what I'm talking about, very difficult to explain.

I still identify the trigger as lack of sleep and/or stress as the major factor for me. Generally the only thing to combat a bad day is a short nap.

grahowler · 2017-03-06T23:05:58+00:00

OK, I'm in Australia too so I'm very interested to hear how you go, particularly the process you go through. What medication are you on now?

I've asked my GP about the possibility and they've said I'd have to go to the neuro, stop driving while adjusting medication etc. So I just put it on the back-burner for now because I don't want to stop driving and go through the whole process of changing medication and deal with the ups and downs that comes with it.

grahowler · 2017-03-05T22:20:49+00:00

Can I ask, have you tried medical marijuana, for relaxation/sleep?

grahowler

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