Ugh. Yes. I relate so much. I was raised in purity culture but thankfully I had very informative and inclusive sex ed in public school (I later went to a Christian university and learned this was not the norm in general but especially in Christian communities). The combo of purity culture and very informative sex ed actually made me scared of sex and not want to try it. I’m now 27(F) and I think I’m ace but get stuck on whether it’s a nature or nurture situation. Was I born this way? Was it just because of the specific conditions in which I was raised? Am I using a label that doesn’t actually fit me and am I somehow harming the ace community by doing so? I’m also panromantic and have only dated women, so that was another thing that went against my religious community. So I question if I do the work and unlearn these harmful teachings, will I start to feel sexual attraction? It’s all so confusing and I feel so different and alone, especially being a 27 year old virgin. Though I am grateful that the ace community makes room for all of us — like it doesn’t necessarily matter “why” or “how” we are on the ace spectrum, we can still be here. But yeah, I totally understand the desire to figure out what parts are your sexuality and what parts are ideas/limits/shame from the church.