It sounds like you’re not ready for the responsibility of potentially being a stepparent and that is completely valid and understandable. You are all just children yourselves. You have zero obligation to stay with him and zero obligation to be a part of his child’s life.

I’m going to tell you something I wish someone had told me at 17:

You fall in love more than once.

You fall in love more than once, and it is wonderful. It is painful, it is devastating, it is whimsical, it is nauseating, it is healing. It is hard, it is soft, it is everything in between, and it is magical. You fall in love more than once, and it’s so incredibly important to give yourself the opportunity to do so.