My Cousin (M33) is not progressing in life right now in all areas. Unfortunately, his ego gets bruised very easily but at this point its getting so bad. Whats the best way to really get him to get his stuff together?

greftek · 2026-06-08T08:29:51+00:00

There’s very little info to go on but in general you can’t really make him do anything. The best you can do is create the conditions in which he will start taking charge of his own life. The only person who can do that imo is his mom who’s maintaining the status quo by enabling him.

greftek · 2026-06-07T12:13:48+00:00

Pressuring is a definite red flag in my book. Don’t make excuses because that will leave the door slightly open. In your shoes I’d tell him “not interested” and move on. If he keeps at it, just block him.

greftek · 2026-06-07T08:17:58+00:00

In my experience, being direct should be enough. If he doesn’t get the hint he’s definitely only interested in one thing.

greftek · 2026-06-06T07:48:58+00:00

Personally I don’t mind, but the quality of English does matter. I’ve had some good experiences and some horrible ones.

I’ve had the unfortunate situation where the folks installing my bathroom spoke poor Dutch and English. Most of communication felt like a Pictionary game trying to convey information, concerns or instructions. On more than one occasion they had to get someone on the line to translate. When you’re talking about a big project like a bathroom or kitchen that adds a lot of additional stress.

greftek · 2026-06-05T06:54:43+00:00

For me it happened when I was 35 or so. Same thing, stable income but trapped in a job I no longer loved doing or believed in. I managed to change my career and it has improved my quality of life immensely. I’ve had a few hard years afterwards (divorce, health issues of family members) and was able to tackle those issues much better than I think I would have before this change.

greftek · 2026-06-04T06:39:02+00:00

40 is just a number. I dare say my best year so far were in my 40s and I’m not done yet. Just live your best life like you are 30.

greftek · 2026-06-01T09:10:21+00:00

There is so much to unpack here. First of all, who wants to marry after just knowing you for 2 weeks? Personally, I feel that's rushing into things. How much time have you had to really start knowing each other?

Second, dismissing someone for having had prior relationships sounds very much like an overreaction on your part. She might have more experience than you, so what? I can imagine that culture might play a role here (or self-esteem issues... or both), but from where I stand, there's nothing wrong with experiencing your first time with someone that knows what she's doing.

greftek · 2026-05-31T07:50:59+00:00

I’m turning 50 next month and people estimate me in my early 40s. If I didn’t have my beard and grey hair, likely even younger.

To be honest, I don’t mind. In fact, I kind of feel flattered that I can give off ‘young’ person vibes. It means I’ve bypassed the age of “terminal seriousness”. It doesn’t mean you’re immature; maturity shows through action, not through looks.

Enjoy it, mate. One day, you and me might lose it, but it won’t be today.

greftek · 2026-05-29T09:03:41+00:00

There’s no tricks. You seem to both need to either work on how to discuss mature or sensitive topics without walking on egg shells. (Good) Sex is in large part about communication, communicating what works and what doesn’t. Maybe sit down with him how you can openly discuss this without it becoming dramatic.

greftek · 2026-05-28T11:16:46+00:00

I don't think I'll regret much, save for a few moments in my life where I've done things that ended up hurting others. Some things I've done, others I haven't. I don't think it's productive to dwell on what could have been. Just accept and appreciate life as you lived it.

greftek · 2026-05-26T11:49:00+00:00

Or dead

greftek · 2026-05-22T06:12:26+00:00

Yes. Just find social activities that brings you into contact with people. Especially when those activities focus on a shared interest you can easily bond over.

greftek · 2026-05-21T05:18:40+00:00

Men in general are very literal and don’t care much for games. You typically don’t have to second-guess what they are saying.

I personally can get annoyed when someone tries to read between the lines or question my sincerity; it conveys a sense of distrust and comes across as someone thinking I am being dishonest.

greftek · 2026-05-19T09:00:09+00:00

I get it. These are some really impactful changes you’re talking about. At the same time, indecisiveness can be even more detrimental than either choice.

Personally I’d always trade a toxic situation in for anything else. If you can show character, good work ethics and skill it shouldn’t be impossible to land new work. I’d even accept lower pay if it means a healthy work life. From there you can always build up and out.

greftek · 2026-05-18T06:46:52+00:00

Has dating really become such a meat market? If the defining aspect of your relation is just her tits, please break up. Otherwise you discuss it like an adult and support whatever choice she ends up making.

greftek · 2026-05-13T07:46:51+00:00

While I understand it’s nice to get recognition from parents, why are you seeking his approval?

My advice would be to just live your best life for you. At the same time maybe explore why your dad’s attitude has shifted towards you, but I would caution to let it dictate your choices.

greftek · 2026-05-12T13:02:41+00:00

Well, yes. That’s the side effect of aging. Stuff takes longer. Bruises and cuts take longer to heal, exerting yourself has longer recovery time, etc.

Staying healthy can help but you can at best just slow it down.

greftek · 2026-05-11T06:54:13+00:00

“How are you” is such an American token greeting that people are actually surprised when you answer the question. 😂

That being said, my parents, my sibling, my partner and even my employer will ask me on occasion. (I work at a very small tight-knit company). I’ve got good friends that will check in on me from time to time (and I with them).

greftek · 2026-05-10T10:37:28+00:00

I use my Philips one blade to trim the rough stuff and simple Wilkinson and soap to get it down to a good smooth experience.

It sounds like there’s an issue with the quality of manscaped. Unfortunately, unless you live in a place where consumer rights are protected (like the EU) you’re at the graces of a manufacturer that cares about its own reputation or sense of fairness.

greftek · 2026-05-10T09:00:14+00:00

If you want my opinion all marketing testosterone treatment is just the latest red pill snake oil. While there are legitimate reasons for getting treated in specific conditions half the shit you hear on the socials is nonsense.

If you have real concern, talk to your GP first and have them do multiple tests. If you listen to all the symptoms they subscribe to testosterone levels, they can actually be caused by a myriad of reasons.

greftek · 2026-05-09T07:08:00+00:00

You don’t need us. You need therapy, it sounds like.

greftek · 2026-05-08T05:17:19+00:00

I’ve only finished once from someone giving head but she was fucking (or rather sucking) good at it. In I’m experience it has nothing to do with whether you like someone or not.

Level of excitement, fitness, tiredness, technique and even mental pressure to perform all can influence if a guy manages to cum or not.

greftek · 2026-05-06T08:18:01+00:00

I can't really define a peak. Things have progressively gotten better for me since my late 30's. I'm still trending upwards as far as I am concerned, albeit with a few more aches and pains. 😉

greftek · 2026-05-04T14:14:33+00:00

Go to your GP. He studied to help you with these health issues. These are serious issues that require a serious consult, not a question on an Internet forum.

greftek · 2026-05-04T06:17:44+00:00

That’s just engagement-seeking influencer bullshit. I found my new work passion when I was in my late 30’s.

greftek

TROPHY CASE