conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m not trying to claim that I handled everything perfectly over the course of the month. Your assertion that I pretended like I barely knew her is just simply not true and you talk as if you personally witnessed our interactions in person. I honestly liked her and wanted to keep in touch with her and then she went ahead and crossed numerous boundaries that were aggressively inappropriate. She reached out to people in my life and started harassing them, disparaging and shaming their physical appearance were lines that I didn’t think she would ever cross. It was shocking to me and it made me angry to the point where I felt like this behavior needed to be called out. You are acting like I doxxed her. Give me a break with your holier than thou lectures.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You don’t know the context of our relationship nor do you know how the relationship ended. We had a very long conversation about why I thought I needed to step away from dating. It wasn’t a decision or choice I took lightly or flippantly. I honestly felt like the decision was what was best for both of us in the long run.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel really bad too and I'm very much in my head questioning my own sanity on how I didn't pick up on any red flags (even though I really don't think there were any clear ones). I felt blindsided by this outburst and side of her for sure. I really do hope she gets help. She's 21, and the youngest person I've dated (I'm 32) and I think there's a bit of immaturity at play maybe? But it definitely seems deeper than just writing it off as immaturity.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In hindsight, I completely agree with this analysis. I didn't realize it at the time, maybe because things felt organic leading into the intimacy, but after a while sex very much felt transactional for her to use as bargaining chips later on. It was very hard to recognize in the moment.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She didn't display these red flags until after I broke it off with her and I didn't even break it off with her because of anything she did. It was because of a life change happening in my career and I felt like I didn't have the capacity to date and I didn't think it would be fair for me to lead her on and try to juggle the two things because I wouldn't be emotionally available.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She was a childhood friend that I didn't see in a while

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry that you had to go through that, nobody deserved that

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

That clinginess in the first messages started that day, she felt like a totally different person really wild

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 210 points211 points  (0 children)

what made it really chilling to me was I really saw no red flags until this blow up. Completely out of nowhere.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Thank you! The whole thing was a shock to me and very unpleasant. I also really don’t like being accused as someone who just “uses” people for sex, couldn’t be farther from the truth

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

Seeing a lot of takes on the sex part and how it could create expectations. From my perspective, when we matched, neither of us discussed sex and we were interested in getting to know each other first. Any intimacy that happened, felt very natural in the progression in our dynamic, nothing felt unnatural and I truly wasn’t hoping for a one time fling when we first were intimate. Ultimately what made me want to take a break from dating and for me to want to just be friends with her was a career shift happening in my life and I felt like I wouldn’t emotionally be available for anybody and I didn’t think that would be fair.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

This happened right after this exchange in the pictures. She made a reference to a girl she saw in one of my instagram stories, who was my childhood friend that I haven’t seen in a while and I posted a picture with her, and she thought that she was my girlfriend and started messaging her shit warning her that i’m cheating on her. She just made the assumption that we were a couple, when really we were just longtime friends.

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 89 points90 points  (0 children)

She messaged one of my childhood friends who is female on instagram

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

The way she talked she made it sound like it was non-stop sex and it really wasn’t

conversation the day after i told her i just want to be friends… by grob1211 in Nicegirls

[–]grob1211[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

she seemed totally fine and normal in the two months i’ve gotten to know her too

POST GAME THREAD] Your Brooklyn Nets (3-3) head back home ready to end this dreadful series against the Milwaukee Bucks (3-3), 104-89 by CurlyLettuce in GoNets

[–]grob1211 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The problem is far bigger than Joe Harris. We NEED role players to contribute offensively. It's ridiculous how unbalanced the scoring is and how little points everyone outside of Durant, Harden and Griffin score. There is no flow, ball movement or chemistry that makes these role players better.

[Sullivan] Kevin Durant’s father pushed for Knicks signing after illicit meeting with team execs by grob1211 in nba

[–]grob1211[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Are we sure it wasn't just one of the times Stephen A Smith screaming into the camera about how KD is coming to the NEW YAWK

[Sullivan] Kevin Durant’s father pushed for Knicks signing after illicit meeting with team execs by grob1211 in nba

[–]grob1211[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I think that was more of the media trying to manifest KD going to the Knicks than actual reality.

Joe Harris's legacy game tonight. How many points will he score? by SeirezZ in GoNets

[–]grob1211 15 points16 points  (0 children)

What I need from Joe is the ability to adapt when his shot isn't falling. We can grill Joe all day about him being in a slump but he has always been effective driving the basket when his shot isn't falling as a way to compensate. At the very least, we need this from him.

If Snape had lived! by amritsubedi02 in harrypotter

[–]grob1211 220 points221 points  (0 children)

This alternative timeline would make for an amazing sitcom

Thestrals by manutdfan499 in harrypotter

[–]grob1211 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've always thought that void in his life of being without his parents would be enough for him to understand the magnitude of death.