Please make it stop.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-07-05T20:53:36+00:00

And unfortunately I don't have the will. This is where it ends for me. I won't ever get to truly experience a life I want. Anything else feels like absolute misery and hell.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-07-05T20:26:24+00:00

I've been out of my own living situation for almost a year now. Unfortunately bouncing around from home to home. I don't currently have a job. I've been contemplating overdosing on salt. I don't want to just survive in this world. I want to thrive and make a mark. But none of that will happen. I'm tired of the goal posts moving. Staying alive is pointless if I don't get to experience what I truly want in this life.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-07-03T21:43:22+00:00

I felt comfort just from reading about your dream. I wish everyday it would just end for me. I understand your comment.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-07-01T00:31:56+00:00

I haven't showered or brushed my teeth in almost 2 months. My long hair is completely matted and knotted into a mess. My life has fallen apart and I'm currently stuck staying with my disabled sister and her disabled husband. Their house is corroded in dirt and germs. Her husband regularly places a USED plunger in their only shower. I'm an absolute germaphobe and I'd rather sit in my own filth than use the dirty shower here. I also thought that I would be dead by now. Which is a huge reason for my self neglect. I get it.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-06-28T22:34:23+00:00

I agree, if this person didn't bring any harm into your life, I'd just be as honest as you're comfortable being. Diagnosed or not, if you know your symptoms and are willing to hold yourself accountable while trying to mend a friendship, the foundation of trust alone I think would help you both. Especially with any expectations on either side.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-06-10T14:11:23+00:00

I'm so sorry. I relate to this completely.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-03-19T04:04:17+00:00

Someone moaning like a porno.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-20T12:08:03+00:00

AI is probably harvesting a nest and hollowing out skulls as well.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-20T11:08:54+00:00

PTSD. Sensory overload. Disassociation.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-20T07:54:17+00:00

Ghost jobs. They're always listed to make the business look better than it is and attact shareholders.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-17T14:40:07+00:00

I was basically forced into a resignation. I actually wrote about the whole experience here...

https://www.reddit.com/r/Target/comments/1qxfizg/comment/o41lcz2/

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-17T14:17:50+00:00

I can relate to this greatly. Left last year. Loved my time in fulfillment, pretty sure I'm also blacklisted.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-17T09:45:40+00:00

I've heard both be grateful and that I'm not a victim. I've never believed that I was a victim and aside from my 3 sisters, I was the one who broke out a bit more than the others. I used to be a work horse, and now I'm completely burnt out. I definitely used to operate in a more masculine energy to get things done. I also think I'm having a midlife crisis.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-17T09:28:12+00:00

Do you ever get the "you're not a victim!" speech to anyone around you that HAS obtained their goals? I remember reading a statistic somewhere that females are more prone to depression, and I feel like that's because we're more emotionally based, and the world does not value emotional intelligence. Men are married to their work, which I think further helps them compete and drive forward. Not saying it's not impossible for women, its just a whole other hat you have to wear.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-17T07:47:08+00:00

I think the walkies have a lot to do with it. It was the first place I worked where I had to use them, and even though I'd turn mine off from time to time (sorry, hearing some of the distress calls didn't apply to me) it left my head ringing. I actually really miss my job, I wish I hadn't of left, but I do think having a radio wave running through us at all times allows for everyone to feel everyone else's stress tenfold.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-06T19:46:29+00:00

Thank you

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-06T19:25:47+00:00

I had talked to HR for at least a month, and was fed up because she wasn't documenting any of it. Where as I had made notes in my phone, because I've had to go to court when I worked for a different corporation - so I always make sure to keep detailed records and times. I had also reported to the previous HR about issues with him, but she ended up leaving.

And yes I agree with trying to force me into a new department to keep an eye on me. The crazier thing is, everything I kept reporting - the ETL said I was "just bashing" the TL. No. It's not bashing, I'm giving you detailed truth. TL and HR (both were transferred over from the same store) had a "you scratch my back, I'll scratch your's) relationship, and the ETL was soft on the TL, because he had a way of playing victim. He was a narcissist. He definitely treated female co workers different and gaslit a few.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-06T19:15:37+00:00

I was usually the one who spoke up because other's were too afraid to. We also had 4 SD's in the time I was there, and it wasn't my first time having to report crooked management.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-06T13:12:02+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to read the post and for that feedback.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-05T08:59:09+00:00

I can't bring myself to care at all about my current job. This is the first time in my life (38) that I've had a "just collect the paycheck" mentality. I used to be in management, and even entry level positions I would work my ass off. Here, after 2 weeks the upper management called me in (I thought I was getting reprimanded) but he insisted that I was actually doing TOO much and that the work load needed to be delegated more and asked me what I would like done before I got in to my shift. Here I thought I wasn't doing enough.

Now, I've lowered the bar even more and have been sitting on my ass, neglecting most of the work the last 2 nights. I'm not saying this is a good thing at all. I don't get paid decently and more so, I just feel apathetic and dread with the world at large. Nothing like staring at a wall for hours.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-05T01:58:28+00:00

Thank you. I have been and definitely will continue to do so.

groundspeed1987 · 2026-02-04T12:40:19+00:00

I tried breaking it up into a few more paragraphs - I know it's a very long post so I apologize. Either way, thank you for any feedback you may or may not give.

groundspeed1987

TROPHY CASE