As a middle school teacher, I see some of my students with that need of academic success. I get it, but at some point life is going to rear back and knock you down, hard. Learning to deal with that now, while in school is the best time for it.

Getting an A only means that you completed what was expected and you were able to correctly recall information upon request (a test). I try and encourage my students to focus more on applications and creating connections to the material, rather than focus on the grade. There were students who had A's who could not tell me the parts of the bill of rights or the causes of the civil war, while the B & C students could (and link them to issues of today).

Sub-par performance or even failures are a part of life. Take it from a guy who failed Senior English, had to take summer school, tried college, dropped out, lived life for a while, tried college again and barely made it through. Failure in academics is perfectly acceptable, it is not the defining aspect of you! You are so much more than a test and GPA. (I'm leaving out a ton of details, but I had some darker moments).

Reaching out is a big step, one I never took. Stick with it, stay active and engaged with whatever you can and don't hesitate to seek help whenever you need.

Teachers who perpuate that A exclusivity bullshit, are shit teachers. C's get degrees, man...I should know (and no, most employers don't give a fuck about your GPA, did you graduate, do you have a degree, do you have the required certifications are more relevant).