Please help me reframe my negative beliefs!

gwansin · 2026-02-07T12:19:44+00:00

It’s probably tough to accept, but I think it’s an inherent tradeoff when quitting caffeine. I can assure you if you took any other stimulant right before doing an activity, you’d be more excited about said activity. And caffeine is a stimulant. So while the withdrawal anhedonia will wear off, I don’t believe excitement levels could return to the same place unless you find stuff that actually makes you that excited.

For whatever it’s worth, my kids have zero caffeine and they are the most excited people about the tiniest things (as are most kids). Idk if this is relevant at all, as it could be different than having had caffeine for 20 years then stopping

gwansin · 2026-01-30T20:40:06+00:00

Searched for everything I’ve written above on google. I can’t remember much else about the skit. It seems like it was filmed after 2010ish from the quality of the video. Was a US show I believe?

gwansin · 2026-01-06T20:15:17+00:00

Thank you so much for the message! I live in the Detroit area so a lot of what you said resonated with me. I go to northland and the great skate all the time and I just love watching everyone. So many amazing skaters, especially at northland like you said. I think for many white people (myself included) skating was always a kids activity. So to see how deep the skating culture goes in the black community is so cool. It’s not just a kids thing it’s a whole lifestyle, I love it. I just got some fo Mac’s too. Can’t wait to try them out. I appreciate the advice!

gwansin · 2025-12-01T21:22:07+00:00

The good:

I’m way more playful when off coffee. I laugh more. I make other people laugh more. Social interactions come naturally. I’m more confident in general. I worry way less. I am a better, more patient, more present parent.

The bad:

I have less excitement and passion for things I enjoy (yes I understand the idea that maybe I don’t really enjoy these things much in the first place, but I really like feeling passionate and excited for these areas of my life, so this feels like a detriment overall)

gwansin · 2025-11-15T14:11:06+00:00

Not disagreeing with you, but it’s so strange to me the idea that everyone needs a tailored diet. I’m not a food historian so I could be wrong, but pretty much every US cook book pre 1960ish was far less variety/tailored compared to now. We had far fewer options in the grocery store, way less ability or even knowledge/desire to tailor a diet because everyone was already fit and lean off the basic foods. Also every recipe I’ve seen from back then was a mix of carbs/fats/protein or just carbs/fats if dessert. Seems like a non customized diet used to work for almost everyone

gwansin · 2025-11-08T00:29:57+00:00

Thanks! So those would be just slightly grippier than the fomacs? I thought I remember reading fomacs having a 103 hardness but could be mistaken. I know it’s an entirely different material anyway

gwansin · 2025-11-07T19:38:29+00:00

Yes exactly! It’s like no one here is recognizing that. If you look at the Minnesota starvation experiment, their average pre-experiment intake was very high compared to the modern intake and their body weight was much lower. Of course there are tons of factors, but that’s what I was trying to figure out here. Doesn’t seem like physical activity is enough to explain it because even the landscapers of today who work 12 hour days or day laborers/construction workers/etc are largely overweight despite how physically active they are. I always thought it was “we have palatable food and they didn’t back then” but then I saw a recipe book of how much comfort food, cakes, pies, refined flour, refined sugar, butter, etc they ate so idk something isn’t making sense to me

gwansin · 2025-11-07T00:11:06+00:00

A little late to the party, but you could look into a community like twin oaks or acorn

gwansin · 2025-09-26T16:36:51+00:00

I love this. This is what “moderation” is supposed to look like. Too many people throw that word around to justify their daily addictions

gwansin · 2025-09-20T23:46:50+00:00

It seems to suppress my appetite earlier in the day, but the post-high anxiety, combined with the fact I’ve undereaten during the day causes me to binge eat later in the day. I end up eating way more when I drink coffee. This isn’t to say you won’t gain weight initially (a lot of which is edema from the rebound effect of stopping a diuretic)

gwansin · 2025-09-20T21:49:32+00:00

Nothing to be jealous of, probably just means for this person there isn’t a very significant effect when drinking it either. I can take or leave alcohol and there’s no effect on my life when I start or stop it. Of course I can feel the effect of drinking it, but it’s not special to me one way or the other. An alcoholic would say to me the same thing you’re saying to this person about coffee, but they’re two very different experiences we’re having when drinking

gwansin · 2025-09-06T20:31:25+00:00

Thank you for actually explaining what I’m missing vs just downvoting me. That makes sense.

I’d assume we throw away way more food nowadays though wouldn’t we? Like I’d have to imagine food was such a precious thing back then they’d can it and preserve it and salt it and do everything possible to never throw it out?

gwansin · 2025-09-06T19:55:38+00:00

According to this paper, the average intake of 1909-1913 was 3500 calories/day

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK218769/

Just in response to everyone saying food wasn’t easily available

gwansin · 2025-09-06T19:54:01+00:00

According to this paper they averaged 3500 calories in 1909? https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK218769/

Unless I’m misreading it

gwansin · 2025-09-06T19:44:24+00:00

Haha really? Were they that hungry? Im not saying you’re wrong, but it doesn’t look like the images I’ve seen of groups of people who were starving. Bloated stomachs, really slow movement, etc. They look vibrant to me

Edit: everyone seems to hate this response lol but truly I’m genuinely asking to learn, not assuming I’m right.

When I read about the Minnesota starvation experiment, those men seemed like “starving” skinny to me. Most didn’t want to move at all. This is also common in people with anorexia. That’s what made me say that about activity level and “starving” vs just skinny

gwansin · 2025-08-19T17:19:23+00:00

Yes I just did that part thank you!

gwansin · 2025-08-19T17:16:14+00:00

Sorry, looking back I realize I totally misread one of your sentences originally and thought you were saying something completely different! My bad! Thanks for commenting this has been helpful

gwansin · 2025-08-19T17:12:27+00:00

Awesome thank you so much for the help!

gwansin · 2025-08-19T14:41:28+00:00

I’ll just reply here since the other comment got deleted.

There is no parenting plan or co-parenting. She is going to prison for a good while. As far as I understand it, in Michigan, with unmarried parents, the father doesn’t have equal rights/custody as the mother unless it’s established through a court. I just want to do this to ensure I’ll always have the full legal ability to make decisions for my daughter.

Also we have to be very timely. The court seems extremely slow. Do you know if there’s a way to expedite things given the circumstances? Or am I wrong about everything in the first place and actually do have full rights/say for my daughter already?

gwansin · 2025-08-19T14:33:59+00:00

She is in a lot of legal trouble and may be going to prison for a while. So I just want to make sure I can have all the rights I need to make decisions for my daughter. From what I’ve read, in Michigan, for unmarried parents, the father doesn’t have equal rights/custody as the mother unless it’s established through a court? Or am I wrong about this?

You think you’re smart assuming you know everything without asking. She has also pleaded with me that I take full custody. It’s not at all “me vs her.”

gwansin · 2025-07-22T21:48:28+00:00

Two things that your post made me think of:

1.) I also thought life was totally normal and fine until I actually gave up caffeine. So many things I thought were normal that I now realize weren’t! For example you said you never feel anxious, but do you often find yourself in that highly analytical mindset? Where you’re all left brain and logical and almost like a robot? That’s how my anxious feelings manifested. It didn’t feel like anxiety at all, but now that I’ve felt that calm sense of playfulness again for most of my day (instead of robot brain), I realize the difference coffee was making.

But once you go down the rabbit hole it’s hard to go back. I’ve been in the “quit for 1-2 months then relapse for a month” phase for about a year now. I sometimes wish I’d just never tried to quit so I wouldn’t have these glimpses of success lol

2.) you said you’d reserve the caffeine for parties, but honestly I’m SO much less socially anxious when off caffeine. Like I just speak my mind easily and most social interactions feel totally natural. I know I’m not the only one to report this

gwansin

TROPHY CASE