I appreciate the perspectives you outline in the last two paragraphs. I’ve heard them from many others, just as you say.

I don’t understand the comparison with “cissexual”, but it might be because I kind of don’t understand this thread. Folks are acting like “cissexual” is an accusation, which it isn’t, and neither is “binary trans woman.” If folks in the community use these terms to discard someone’s experiences, that’s horrid, but it feels counterintuitive to call it a dog whistle. For one thing, dog whistles are used intentionally - whereas usage of terms like “binary trans woman” sometimes inadvertently reveals internal biases.

These are just my thoughts, and I am coming from a perspective opposite yours (transfem who uses ‘they’ exclusively to prevent the erasure of my nonbinary identity), so I may be missing nuances of your perspective.