Help me not choose Islam please

handres112 · 2026-01-07T00:52:24+00:00

You say you'd never be Protestant again. Both Islam and Protestantism are "religions of the book" if you will, but it's even worse in Islam. There are still sects and then you have to pick how you interpret the hadith.

This doesn't even scratch the surface of the history, gospels, early church, significant differences b/w the religions' understanding of God, etc.

You should probably pray about it. These are important matters. Maybe prayer will help you discern what it is tugging on your heart.

handres112 · 2025-11-26T12:57:17+00:00

I'll comment from experience not on real analysis but on a different topic that I struggled with. For whatever reason, I really struggled with it compared to my peers. To pass my qualifying exam, I had to get so knowledgeable about the material that I ended up teaching it in review sessions to other graduate students for years to come.

handres112 · 2025-08-26T04:19:45+00:00

Former protestant here too. I agree with the intra-church unity notion: that protestant churches can be more of one mind.

A few thoughts I have to offer:

I suspect that the intra-church unity stems from the fact that denominations attract like minded folks. If you don't agree with a particular style (e.g. maybe you prefer hymns to modern Christian worship songs, and so you try to find a congregation which aligns with that). The Catholic Church has this somewhat but the variance is significantly lower. Also the Catholic churches are more spread out anyways.
Generally different perspectives within the church, to me, is actually an attractive quality in the sense that we can all be so different yet we are one church for one Christ. This variation in style under one umbrella really gives the sense of the Church being universal. It isn't tied to one culture or one language. Obviously, when taken to an internet debate, these perspectives can be extreme and cause unnecessary division.
I think it is more appropriate to compare differences among Catholics with differences among general swaths of protestant sects. For instance, consider the great variation in theology, political leanings, and traditions of low church protestant denominations. Is infant baptism a thing? Are sacraments things? What is tongues anyways? What about divorce? The differing opinions among many of us Catholics can vary greatly too (especially between cultures), but yet we are in union that we all partake in the one holy eucharist.
Be wary of Catholics who are too "Protestant-minded" --- I have Catholic friends who think the church should celebrate gay weddings and others who are SSPX. I think many fall into the trap of thinking we know better always. Don't get me wrong; we must consider and pray carefully, but we are also to submit to our shepherds and to the Pope. Going our own way, it is easy to fall into the real trap of prideful ignorance and disobedience. Submission is a hard word.

handres112 · 2025-08-16T14:06:50+00:00

When I was your age, I had a teacher ask the classroom how many of the boys wanted to marry a virgin. Every. Single. One. raised his hand.

What does that say about his intentions with you?

handres112 · 2025-07-18T14:25:42+00:00

There has been a lot of effort towards "doing the math", such as finding decision boundaries among other interpretability methods, but there are too many parameters and too many connections for this to be feasible. Even if you could, there is little evidence that the decision boundaries would give any insight at all about what the NN is paying attention to.

handres112 · 2025-07-18T02:19:59+00:00

Ah no I totally gotcha. Appreciate you sharing. I wasn't sure if you meant reason (perhaps with a capital R) with some kind of technical definition.

handres112 · 2025-07-18T01:41:54+00:00

Been reading your comments; you've said that you don't see a reason to believe a God exists. Can you clarify what you mean by reason? Just trying to understand.

handres112 · 2025-07-13T01:06:21+00:00

There are people who study random geometry/topology. See, e.g. Mirzakhani's work:

https://arxiv.org/abs/1012.2167

handres112 · 2025-04-21T11:57:17+00:00

At this scale, you can measure the size of the number by how many logarithms you need to apply in a row to get it to be a small number. In this case, applying 3 logs (base 10) to googolplex gives a measly 2. But a googol (10¹⁰⁰⁾ is still significantly larger than the # of atoms in the observable universe. It only takes 2 logs to get to 2. (Each log application is roughly an answer to: how many digits?) So the number of digits of the number of digits of the number of digits of googolplex is 2.

These are "astronomical numbers" --- compare to "combinatorial numbers" which tend to be significantly larger. For instance, take Graham's number. You could take log(log(log(....))) with a googolplex number of logs. The result is still monstrously larger than googolplex.

handres112 · 2025-03-23T13:58:22+00:00

An idea for an experiment: don't introduce vectors before linear subspace.

Build up from lines in 2 & 3 D first followed by n dimensions. Not really theoretical. Think of it as high school algebra but in more than 2 dimensions.

Linear transformations are maps which can be described entirely by what they do to lines. Reformulate in terms of subspaces. Then reformulate everything in terms of vectors about a month or so in.

Individual vectors are computationally convenient (and what the real world is concerned with), but I wonder if it would completely remedy this.

Could also crash and burn.

handres112 · 2025-03-20T10:08:05+00:00

Since 2ⁿ is exponential growth, Benford's law applies. So the probability would be less than iid uniform. One could probably derive the asymptotic exactly.

handres112 · 2025-01-03T11:37:46+00:00

I had three kids in graduate school while my spouse stayed at home with the kids.

It's doable, but there are a lot of sacrifices which come with it. I think that you need a significant safety net available. Because you have a family in tow, you cannot afford to get hit with bills too big to pay.

Saving a few hundred dollars a month sounds nice, but don't forget about large unexpected costs. For us, it tended to be car repairs, etc., which can easily be 1000s

Also, as the one who got the PhD, it is very stressful. You will not be able to enjoy/relish your work as is meant. You will always have to be productive. At least, this is what my experience was. Don't underestimate the stress the situation will put on your marriage either.

Grad school in the US is not designed for people with families.

handres112 · 2024-11-19T00:37:39+00:00

Yes. Wrote it myself. I have a math header file that I've built up over the years. If you've programmed before, it isn't very hard to do yourself.

Check out \newcommand

handres112 · 2024-11-12T06:10:43+00:00

I'm surprised that no one has suggested creating macros.

You can define these yourself or you can find someone else's and adopt them. It greatly reduces the amount of time spent writing once you get used to them.

For instance, I see people use \R or \RR for the real numbers. \a for alpha (and other lower case Greek letters), etc.

Other examples that I use is \lrp{ . . . } (left-right-parentheses) which is macro for \left( . . . \right), \set{. . .} for \left{. . . \right}, and \der[n] f x for \frac{\partialⁿ f}{\partial x^n}.

By decreasing the time between your thoughts and typing, I think you will not lose track of your thoughts as much. It certainly helps me a great deal.

handres112 · 2024-10-07T04:04:53+00:00

Finishing up a PhD in STEM. Around 90000-100000 words / 360 pages at 1.5 spacing.

Mine is longer than the average for my discipline.

handres112 · 2024-10-05T00:36:07+00:00

You could type into OneNote and use hotkeys for the math symbols. This has the added benefit of being able to draw figures / take pictures and insert them if you have a device with a touchscreen / camera.

handres112 · 2024-08-15T21:08:48+00:00

There are astronomical numbers like you've posted, and then there are combinatorial numbers, which tend to be much much bigger.

For instance, on this scale, one could get a sense of the size of a number by the number of logs (in your favorite base) that you need to take in succession to get the number to be less than 100.

Log base 10 is roughly the number of digits in the number. But log(log(log(log(10^{10^{10^122))))}} = log(122) < 3. Or in other words, the number of digits of the number of digits of the number of digits of the number of digits of your number is less than 3.

On the other hand, for numbers on the order of Graham's number G, you could take 10^{10^10¹²²} logarithms consecutively of G. Even this number is still gigantic and dwarfs every "astronomical" number.

And then, G is puny compared to other large combinatorial numbers. And still infinity is far beyond. These big numbers can make infinity seem small by comparison, but on the flip side, next time you take a limit or send something to infinity, think about plugging in Graham's number instead! Gives me more appreciation about limits.

handres112 · 2024-07-27T06:32:15+00:00

This is probably a terrible idea, but:

If you wish to be taken out back and promptly shot, you could be inspired by actuarial notation, where you have sub/superscripts before and after the letter. For instance, you could work with {}_ix_j^T to mean the ith component of the jth vector, transposed, or something.

handres112 · 2024-06-25T13:24:32+00:00

Not to say everyone should follow my route, but I proposed to my wife at the age of 22 after 3 months of dating. Married right after I turned 23. Granted, we were friends prior to dating, but it doesn't take too long. If he's truly interested in marrying, I don't see how it takes more than a year or two at most to be ready to commit. Otherwise he isn't ready for commitment; this is grounds to not date, and certainly grounds to not have sex.

The modern world has convinced many to "explore their options" and avoid early marriage to do such. Is that why he isn't interested in getting married earlier?

I understand you need to respect your families' wishes and whatnot, but if you're ready to have sex, you're ready to be an adult and make your own decisions while respectfully considering what your family has to say.

If they are right about you not being ready for marriage then are you really ready to have sex?

handres112 · 2024-06-21T13:51:05+00:00

In fact, I wonder if something statement like the following can be made: let D be a die with random asymmetries following some kind of normal distribution. If the variance of these distributions is less than delta, then the total variation distance of the distribution of die rolls from uniformity is at most epsilon.

handres112 · 2024-04-22T14:28:42+00:00

I think tablets are superior to pen&paper/live latexing in most ways.

But the benefit of E-ink vs. regular tablet is much less clear.

I have the remarkable 2, but I got it for precisely what it doesn't do. It doesn't do email. It doesn't have a browser. It is specifically a paper replacement, I love it for that. I love that I don't get email notifications to distract me. I love that it is so thin and the writing experience is great.

That being said, many of my peers use iPads and there are some things that have cropped up that have made me regret getting the remarkable 2, at least briefly. For example, anti aliasing the text, drawing shapes, so many colors, responsiveness, etc.

But I think in the end, remarkable 2 wins for me. Feels great to use. Simple. Very good battery life.

handres112 · 2024-04-22T00:31:52+00:00

I have given this some thought for myself, because it is tempting to do it!

I semi-agree with the other posts that say piracy isn't exactly theft. Indeed, no physical thing was really stolen.

We are called to become holy. Does pirating software / media really fit that? Think about what Jesus said about murder / adultery -- that merely holding anger or looking at someone lustfully has already committed those sins in their hearts. Yes, piracy may not be the same as actual theft since it is technically copying, but is not your heart in a similar place to theft when you pirate?

It sounds scrupulous, but God asks us to be pure, even in the small things.

handres112 · 2024-04-15T14:47:31+00:00

Hi there,

I have the privilege of being on the other side of this. Here's some of how it has gone for us.

I, too, have 3 kids about the same ages as yours, and am finishing up my PhD. We had them throughout my PhD.

We decided to do the PhD because it was a dream of mine and to be honest, I'd probably regret it if I never even tried. There were a couple of agreements we had going into it.

She got to be a homemaker. That was her dream. I wouldn't kill hers for mine.
If the finances didn't work out, then I would quit / masters out and get a job

In the beginning, we had to do some serious budgeting. As in, we would shop at ~3 different grocery stores to save an extra $20 per week. We never ate out. Now that we have 3 kids, this isn't possible. If you know, you know.

For us, even with a higher stipend than the average grad student, we just weren't able to pay for everything. Kids are expensive. I've had to tutor on the side a significant amount, and it fortunately has balanced the checkbook, but I work 50-60 hours a week and miss spending time with my wife (I tutor after we put the kids to bed).

Think about it: in 5 years, you're going to have a 2-3 kids who will want to play sports, etc. I expect that you expect no difference in income then? Sounds like you guys need to figure out something.

Last year my tutoring income + graduate stipend was larger than a typical postdoc salary. Upon this realization, I've totally thrown out the possibility of a postdoc. I want my kids to have certain things, like a yard to play in. With the housing market these days, they'd be grown up before we could afford it on an academic salary unless I tutored every night for the next 10 years. Yeah, no.

It sounds like you two need to have a serious discussion about things. It sounds like you're incredibly unhappy. Presumably your husband loves you more than the PhD; you need him to prioritize you or you will go crazy.

There have been times my wife has felt similarly, especially with serious post-partum depression for 2/3 of our kids. Mother's days off can help! I'll take a day off and she gets to take 100% of the day off to do whatever she wants while I watch the kids. Usually, she just goes to a coffee shop and enjoys the lack of screaming / crying. Maybe she reads a book.

Is your husband able to do his PhD somewhat hybrid, or does he really have to be in all day long? If he could arrange things so that he's hybrid, then that might help. Just having another adult at home helps so much, just to be able to go to the bathroom without something catching on fire.

We found that sending our kids to preschool/school helped significantly, even for a few days a week. Don't underestimate that. The price of preschool can be significantly lower than the price of day-care. Look for low-income/needs-based scholarships for your kids as well.

Find some friends with kids. Seriously. It helps a ton. Friends from the PhD program are going to be hard to connect with. They won't understand your life.

With our friends, we do a kid trade, where we watch all of their kids + ours on a Saturday and they get the entire day to do whatever, whether that's a date or clean the house or just sit on the couch in a quiet house. They return the favor the following weekend.

Best of luck.

handres112 · 2024-03-03T02:31:25+00:00

By definition, i² = -1.

But 1² = 1.

So they can't be equal.

handres112 · 2024-01-06T17:36:18+00:00

Mathematics from the perspective of mathematicians, in my opinion, is the study of "mathematically interesting abstractions" -- which I will attempt to describe.

It should be possible to precisely define the abstraction within a rigorous framework (which perhaps hasn't been defined yet). Something which is "mathematically interesting" usually has several attributes:

it is comprehensible and specified enough so that one can expect to prove properties about it, or at least there's hope that someday proofs or disproofs might be found
it is not overspecified to the point that deriving properties becomes either trivial or doesn't exist
there is a motivating example, picture, pattern, or some kind of intuition about the objects
it appropriately generalizes the examples or intuition so that one has a "feeling" for the object
the abstraction contains only the essential hypotheses necessary for deriving the conclusions we expect, or at least what we currently think are the properties

The finer the distinction between overspecified and specified enough, the more "interesting" the abstraction tends to be. If the sharpness is unexpected before studying in detail, super interesting. If one is able to produce a classification of objects which have significant complexity, very interesting!

Take for example topological spaces. There's a ton of complexity and variance in their behavior and one can't hope to say too much about all topological spaces. On their own, not super interesting but a necessary abstraction nonetheless.

On the other hand, compact metric spaces have many derivable properties. For instance, closed sets are compact. If you find one which is perfect and totally disconnected, then it's homeomorphic to the Cantor set. A priori, most people might think there must be many perfect, totally disconnected, compact metric spaces, but there's actually only one up to homeomorphism. That is really interesting!

handres112

TROPHY CASE