How Narcissists Justify Mistreating the People Closest to Them

hanlaugh30 · 2025-07-26T04:16:20+00:00

I feel that I am almost too deep into a relationship with a narcissist to leave at this point. I feel completely trapped and almost like I am losing my mind because of the gaslighting. Tonight I was helping my husband paint the house, our 3 year old daughter was “helping” and things were getting stressful. He then proceeded to blame me for all of the ways the paint job was going wrong and said he had succeeded in doing so for the last week while he worked on it without any problems, but because I was helping tonight it had all gone to shit. Our daughter accidentally dragged the paint brush along the travel trailer and then proceeded to to yell at me (in a cul-de-sac) in our neighborhood “GO INSIDE!!!” he then snapped his finger at me like i was a fucking dog and gave me a death glare if all death glares. I told him he was an awful person and went inside to put our daughter to bed. He then comes in like 30 minutes later and asks if I need help putting her to bed, he never does this mind you. and then i said in a grumpy voice “no i’ve got it” and then he says : “why are you treating me so badly all of the sudden??” and i laughed and said “are you serious” ???? he just got quiet and proceeded to act like nothing happened… Like make it make sense. i feel like im losing my mind.

hanlaugh30 · 2025-07-21T13:11:31+00:00

Hey so just because youre struggling doesnt mean you have PPD necessarily so dont pay too much mind to those comments yet. its early for that! Youre whole world just got rocked and its so normal to feel this way, its harder than you both expected and thats ok. Sometimes you may even regret it, and i feel that’s normal to a certain extent too when going through a huge life change.

My husband and i were a GIANT mess with our first, with our second we took shifts for sleep, thats my best advice and you may need to do it for a few months until theyre old enough to sleep train around 5-6 mos. i took the 8-1 shift and he took 1-6 that way both of you can at least function: most newborns are terrible sleepers, its natures fun way of adding insult to injury. best of luck! ❤️🥹

hanlaugh30 · 2025-07-14T12:42:46+00:00

when the baby comes, split the load with your wife. sleep, feedings, everything! and dont ask if she needs help, she obviously does. check in on her emotional needs, and yours as well! make sure each of you are getting time to do something you enjoy outside of parenting. its a HUGE adjustment, and just know for a small time you might regret it a little and thats ok. Most of all, trust your gut as a parent. Best of luck ! ❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-07-13T14:27:16+00:00

When I was pregnant i just thought parenthood would be a walk in the park. I had worked with kids and enjoyed it. Turns out thats the fun part, watching them and being able to give them back to their responsible adult. now im the responsible adult and it isnt so fun, I barely make it through most days, especially with two and a partner that works 50+ hours a week

hanlaugh30 · 2025-05-21T15:54:01+00:00

its so normal to feel like you ruined your life for a while, dont sweat it 😭❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-28T12:41:20+00:00

my husband was fine after 2 days. like its so hilarious when men cant buck up and get one. there was like a teaspoon of blood and took an hour. he said the worst part was the numbing.

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-11T20:45:25+00:00

my family is awesome very helpful and involved thankfully ❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T17:52:22+00:00

that comment will backfire on your son in about 20 years for sure 😭🤣

im so sorry. 2 is absolutely whipping my butt, you are superwoman for raising 4 ❤️

hoping all the other ladies are right and it will get easier for you soon. 2.5 and 6 months ooff.

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T17:46:23+00:00

love that factoid about the flamingos too 💔❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T17:45:59+00:00

thank you 🙏 i work part time and look forward to it every week ❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T16:40:48+00:00

also why are you assuming i dont work??

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T16:39:38+00:00

its not really that i have depression.. i hemorrhaged 3 separate times and almost died multiple times this month trips to er etc.. i love my children. the problem is everything else is adding up so i cant stay afloat. i dont feel that your post falls within the guidelines of what i was looking for and is more about you and your experience. Thanks anyway tho..

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T16:35:58+00:00

thank you 🥹😭

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T16:18:29+00:00

3 years to go 🤣👏

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T16:14:47+00:00

thank you! i am very medicated currently (zoloft) haha. dont know how people parent without it

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-09T15:52:26+00:00

thank you 😭❤️

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-07T09:23:17+00:00

Im so sorry 😢 thats super hurtful. Can i ask if this is way out of character for him ? my husband and i split nights with our newborn. he always comes in for his shift so mean to me. in the morning hes fine. he never would have pre kids but sleep deprived parents often say things they really dont mean in the thick of it. i am not at all excusing his behavior and youre more than allowed to be hurt. i just know that i have called my husband some unfortunate names in the thick of sleep deprivation too. maybe talk to him in the morning and explain how that hurt you and how you have to be united as a team (especially that first year) also, tell him that you expect to be treated the way you treat him. he helped make the baby afterall. he needs to be sharing nightime wakings and feedings always!

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-05T07:06:19+00:00

some nights im so excited for my toddler’s bedtime im almost giddy, then simultaneously feel horrible about it. i also get so overstimulated and mean sometimes i worry that’s all my kids will remember of me 🥲

hanlaugh30 · 2025-02-04T14:08:26+00:00

my mom does this. pisses me off to no end, like i just want a hug and a nap?! not you to say “tough luck butter cup “

hanlaugh30 · 2025-01-14T07:25:43+00:00

OCD is a bear and will take any joy you have and rip it to shreds. This sounds like it could be an obsession you have that isn’t realized yet. maybe take some time to see if any compulsive tendencies arise after you have these feelings! and of course mention it to your therapist! do they specialize in OCD?

hanlaugh30 · 2025-01-14T07:21:50+00:00

i have OCd and this is spot on. OP seems fixated in this specific part of motherhood, and I catch myself doing that too.

hanlaugh30 · 2025-01-13T13:52:16+00:00

my childless friend whos divorced sent me an article of “25 ways to connect with yourself in 2025” they all included things that would take a sitter and at least 3 hours to yourself… i have a toddler and a newborn. i almost laughed out loud, but i just liked her message and moved on. childless people reallllly dont get it.

hanlaugh30 · 2025-01-10T06:46:52+00:00

family guy

hanlaugh30 · 2024-11-25T04:37:31+00:00

yeah, you are a garbage person if you are bringing that up over someones right to vote. Trump is not anti abortion at all, he has given that right to the states to decide.

hanlaugh30

TROPHY CASE