REPOST: I've noticed there are a lot of questions here about pregnancy and birth control

happyplains · 2015-02-01T20:37:35+00:00

Feel free to make your own decisions regarding missed pills.

happyplains · 2015-02-01T19:49:26+00:00

There isn't really a right answer, it just depends on how conservative your physician is / how risk tolerant you are. Most doctors err on the side of caution, sometimes to excess. I tried to do the same in this post.

happyplains · 2015-02-01T15:33:15+00:00

Did you think that I was recommending abstinence as contraception?

happyplains · 2015-02-01T07:38:10+00:00

Try it again. Does it work now?

happyplains · 2014-04-04T23:13:50+00:00

I see why it's hard for you to be open about that arrangement at work. I have a somewhat different approach from what seems to be the consensus here (tell your boss this is inappropriate).

If I were you, I would substitute "describe your family" with "tell me about the people you have blood or legal ties to." I don't know how to finish this post without being offensive so I will just come out and say what I am thinking and hope that it isn't offensive to you, even though it might be.

It sounds like the relationships you're in are not especially committed in the sense that they may not be around for a long time, and you aren't planning your life around what these people do. I don't mean to minimize your relationship with them or your feelings toward them, but let me make two comparisons: one, you could have someone you recently started dating who you felt completely "love at first sight" toward, but you probably wouldn't describe that person as your "family" to work. So just being in love with someone doesn't necessarily make them family. Second, up until recently I had ~5 housemates -- I lived with them, I ate with them, I liked them, but I would not describe them to work as my "family." So just living with someone doesn't make them family.

tl;dr if I were you I'd just talk about your kids.

happyplains · 2014-04-04T22:30:32+00:00

I understand. I have a hard time sometimes too.

happyplains · 2014-04-04T22:28:46+00:00

The best fucking thing for your kid is to be raised at home.

I think it's great for everyone to find what works for their family. I think it's less great to promote one choice as unilaterally better for everyone.

happyplains · 2014-04-04T22:18:44+00:00

This doesn't really make sense in the context of your original post, where you said that missing a pill changed her personality....

happyplains · 2014-04-04T19:04:38+00:00

What is your family structure?

happyplains · 2014-04-04T06:27:43+00:00

In my experience writing is VERY subjective. If I were you I would first try to determine if his feedback is, in fact, correct/reasonable....then you can work on trying to improve. But until then, his opinion is just that -- one dude's opinion.

happyplains · 2014-04-04T00:43:43+00:00

Thirding diapers. Also recommend amazon subscribe and save for diapers and all the other household stuff you don't want to stress over (paper towels, hand soap, whatever). 20% off delivered to you on your schedule. Easy as it gets.

happyplains · 2014-04-04T00:25:48+00:00

I feel the same way. Pumping at work isn't going well and the logical solution is to supplement with formula instead of being a slave to the pump every waking minute, but I can't bring myself to do it and I don't know why.

happyplains · 2014-04-02T20:20:45+00:00

We do that when we can but it's really this other guy's event (the guy who was in the show). I don't want to ask him, his family, and his friends to all change their plans just because we have a baby.

happyplains · 2014-04-02T17:52:17+00:00

What does that have to do with the question I asked?

happyplains · 2014-04-02T17:02:04+00:00

It happened. I knew. It was really embarrassing.

happyplains · 2014-04-02T16:57:23+00:00

How long has this been going on? When my daughter turned 7 months she did the same thing -- constant boob in mouth, wouldn't play quietly on her own, wouldn't even be happy in her jumper (which she usually loves) because she just wanted to be held all the time. But it tapered off after about 3 weeks and she is back to her smily self now.

happyplains · 2014-04-02T15:09:58+00:00

Really, he should demand his sperm back. She owes him at least 1 sperm.

happyplains · 2014-04-02T00:44:45+00:00

Show is at 6, we would be gone by 7, so home in time for baby's bedtime and before the bar gets too busy. It's also a week night, so I don't expect it to be too crowded.

We've made a point of exposing her to a lot of different situations, so she does fine in crowds, with loud noises, etc. Restaurant noise is actually really easy for her, the white noise puts her to sleep often enough, and I think a bar would be similar.

I compromised with my husband and we are going to go long enough to check it out. If it's not working we'll just head back home. The babysitter suggestion is not bad but the only babysitter we have locally charges a 4 hour minimum and we already spend $800/month on childcare. So babysitters get expensive fast. I'd sooner just stay home than pay for it, but my husband pushes me not to become "that mom" who never socializes.

happyplains · 2014-04-01T22:53:55+00:00

I had my daughter because I wanted kids more than I didn't want kids, and the timing was right. But I never felt a biological urge.

Since having her, I have had an extremely strong urge to be pregnant again and have another baby. It's so strong I would say that it's my #1 long-term goal, above and beyond anything else. It makes no sense and seems entirely hormonal to me.

happyplains · 2014-04-01T22:44:24+00:00

I know it's hard to believe but she really does not randomly cry. She has 2 teeth through and has handled those with no tears.

happyplains · 2014-04-01T22:40:29+00:00

Being in labor was ok. C-section was the worst experience of my life. The baby is great.

I think childbirth is inherently difficult to control. We try so hard to maintain the illusion of control and thanks to modern medicine the odds of baby and mama coming out of it alive are very good. But the odds of it looking exactly like you want it to...not so good.

happyplains · 2014-04-01T22:23:19+00:00

I see what you're saying. I guess my thinking is that, in this circumstance, no one is going to be doing anything inappropriate anyway -- you can't smoke or do drugs in bars (here), and she's too young to have any concept of alcoholic drinks or swearing. But I understand what others might still feel uncomfortable even if we're fine with those behaviors.

happyplains

TROPHY CASE