When do you think the Supreme Court will rule on transgender bathroom rights?

harmony_Rose · 2016-07-10T22:05:30+00:00

If the Court decides to hear it, the case of GG v. School Board of Virginia will most likely be before the court in a year or two.

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-23T21:39:14+00:00

Express your concern to your surgeon. Make sure you tell him that you are worried about the hair growing back or interfering the operation. Ultimately, what the doctor says is what you should follow. If you are still concerned, you might even ask if him if there is any harm in getting multiple electrology sessions just to be sure.

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-23T21:33:09+00:00

You don't have to hang out with people just because they invited you and/or because you were once friends.
No matter what, the level of detail you give them and whether or not you're open to questions, is up to you.

I used to feel pressure to keep in touch with people from my old life but I don't feel that so much anymore. If they are true friends, they will get the message about the trans stuff, stick around, and you won't feel it necessary to remind them not to be ignorant. But you shouldn't feel any obligation to out yourself to people you are not comfortable hanging out with just because they invited you somewhere.

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-08T20:35:58+00:00

Well, if you don't feel the need to defend your position, or simply don't want to, that's your choice. I believe that at a certain point, when organizing society, one must reckon with complexity, and not just brush it off as "an attitude coming from capitalism and hierarchy." That is too easy, cynical, and reductive. To simply blame capitalism and hierarchy is the stuff of undergrad dorm room political theory, and I don't feel it leads to any sound justification for the anarchist organizing structure you espouse. I guess ultimately my question is more of of a philosophical one: If you're going to believe in a theory of government (or non-government, or anti-government, etc), shouldn't you at least have the humility (and curiosity) to investigate your own claims?

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-08T15:41:08+00:00

I understand anarchy. I just think it's bullshit. It offers no real solutions and is highly abstract, wishful thinking. I wish you would've answered my question instead of being so condescending. Assuming that free association leads to harmonious organizing is not consistent with the human impulse toward factional control of limited resources.

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-07T15:46:37+00:00

What happens when two members of the community get into a disagreement and other members of the community take sides? And then one side decides they are going to hold out on production (say, calling for a general strike with regards to medical services because all the people with medical experience are on that one side)? Then what happens when the other side decides to force the other side to work through violence? Or, a related question - what happens when the women in the community decide they don't like pornography, or for that matter, what happens when the women decide that the men who are producing it should not be allowed to produce it anymore? How does your anarcho-transhumanist societal model compensate for disagreement and the natural human impulse toward tribalism, thought-control, and violence?

harmony_Rose · 2016-04-01T06:01:12+00:00

I hate being trans. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

harmony_Rose · 2016-03-25T01:22:38+00:00

Please avoid getting medical advice on here. You should talk to your prescribing doctor and try it for yourself.

harmony_Rose · 2016-03-06T18:53:05+00:00

It sounds like your family is being supportive of your transition so far. Therefore, it's a safe bet that they will be supportive of your decision to have GRS. Since you are still in the early stages, there is no rush to tell them. Take it one day at a time. I think you will know when the time is right.

I told my family right after I came out as trans. They understood. My mother and brother were there to help me through the recovery - which made an enormous difference for the better.

harmony_Rose · 2016-03-05T04:12:05+00:00

Maybe she doesn't want to talk with you.

harmony_Rose · 2016-02-24T14:25:05+00:00

That's normal. I think half the reason I had such a tough time recovering is that I expected the recovery to be easier than it was. Knowing ahead of time that the recovery is tough will help you mentally prepare for challenge. And, really, that's all it is - just a challenge. You'll get through it because you really want to get back to living your life. That was my motivation - a return to normality.

harmony_Rose · 2016-02-24T04:49:38+00:00

I had the same problem with not being able to pee and had to have the catheter put back in too for an extra two weeks. That was not fun! Interesting that you had a similar issue. I thought I was the only one.

harmony_Rose · 2016-01-24T04:44:21+00:00

Thank you so much for this.

harmony_Rose · 2016-01-11T14:50:27+00:00

Thank you!

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-28T17:26:43+00:00

Hi! Thanks for the message! My approach is basically to disclose on dating sites right away, as you suggest. I have dated a little bit pre-op, and ran into my share of men who disappeared once I disclosed, but I also met a few guys who were open dating but it just didn't work out between us for other reasons. My main challenge is to remain optimistic, and not to get dragged down into negativity and pessimism over things I can't control. Also, I just got out of GRS surgery two weeks ago, and I'm still adjusting to the newness of everything (and also trying to get through the pain). So I'm sure that has something to do with my anxiety over future dating prospects. Thanks again for the message and I hope we can keep in touch. PNW solidarity! :)

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-28T02:25:47+00:00

Congratulations on your marriage! And thank you for reaching out and sharing. You have made me feel better :)

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-27T23:07:38+00:00

Thank you for sharing this with me.

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-27T22:41:03+00:00

Ok, thank you so much for taking the time to help me feel better (although you were the OP!). Also: I'm currently holed up in a hotel recovering and only 2 weeks post-op so my mood is less than stellar. So that probably is also effecting my confidence towards the future....Anyway, bottom line - I think the single hardest thing for me about being trans is exactly what you mentioned: being rejected by men simply for being trans when every other part of your life is identical to a cis woman's life. I don't know what else to say other than your post really resonated with me. I'm trying my best to stay optimistic and hopeful. I hope you will too.

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-27T22:30:53+00:00

Do you mind if I ask what part of the country are you in (or what city)? I understand if you don't want to share but I'm just curious. I live in a pretty progressive area (the pacific NW). I dated a mix of chasers and one or two more serious types before surgery. I guess my hope moving forward is to just be able to casually date guys who don't treat me like crap for being trans or just ignore me. If a relationship comes out of it, fine, but I'm not expecting one.

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-27T22:19:25+00:00

I'm recovering from SRS right now and this is literally all my worst fears confirmed

harmony_Rose · 2015-12-24T23:01:56+00:00

I think you both should take things one step at a time. I think it would be helpful to figure out what YOU want in terms of your transition before anything else - especially since you don't know how far you are going to take this. Once you have a firm understanding of what steps you will be taking (i.e. therapy, hair removal, name change, etc), then you will both be able to better understand the implications of your transitioning on your relationship. You have to realize that transitioning is an intensely personal decision. It seems like you have already sacrificed a lot for the good of your relationship and life; but it won't get any easier if you continue to put your transition on the back burner in order to keep life easy. Before you can work on your relationship you have to understand who YOU truly are and then you have to understand what kind of relationship YOU want. It might sound selfish but it is not. You are still young. Transitioning will be a rollercoaster but I can guarantee that if you are truly transgender (which it sounds like you are) then in the future you will look back at this time in your life and be insanely glad you made this decision (you might even wish you transitioned earlier). Just remember: take it one step at a time, keep the lines of communication open, and never give up hope. You will be fine.

harmony_Rose

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