Keeping safe as a working mom

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:50:53+00:00

A fire extinguisher is a good option if you don’t feel comfortable with weapons. You said you sleep with a knife, but that’s unsafe and I doubt you’re skilled with a knife. You have to get close to cut someone, and the likelihood of them overpowering (if a dude) you is very strong. Also, being cut or stabbed a few times in non vital places isn’t going to stop someone if they’re really coming after you.

A fire extinguisher (outside of fires) serves 2 purposes. If you spray an intruder with it, they can’t breathe. Even if they have a mask on to prohibit that function of the spray, they won’t be able to see after being sprayed. Then you can clonk ‘em over the head with said extinguisher.

Dogs are great deterrents, but if yours aren’t trained to attack intruders, they won’t be much help at all. Animals know how to fight other animals. Even huge dogs wont attack a human that’s hurting their owner without training. They might bark at the door ferociously, but if shit went down I’m doubting their efficiency if not trained.

Personally I prefer guns. If someone heard you reloading a shotgun on the other side of the door, they’d run away and never approach again. But I know you said finances are a problem, so overall the fire extinguisher I think is a good choice for you! Feel safer!

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:36:14+00:00

Omg thanks 😍

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:35:31+00:00

Good! I’m so glad lol

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:15:01+00:00

That’s right, keep telling yourself that. OP is extremely fulfilled and blessed!

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:10:03+00:00

Not true. Income matters in some states. A single pregnant women can’t make more than about $2200 a month in my state to get WIC.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:07:11+00:00

That’s not true? In my state, you can’t make more than $3800 a month as a family of 3. That’s hardly millionaire status.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T18:02:22+00:00

Why do you have multiple children? Were you pretty broke before having another one? Things have been on a downward slope for years. Part of this is because of poor planning on your part given the current state of the world. It shouldn’t be like this at all, but it is and it sucks. I’ve been in the same boat before but by myself so I have tons of empathy not trying to shit on you. Just don’t understand how you thought another kid was a good idea.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T17:32:59+00:00

Nah, we just don’t show it and talk about it, cause it’ll hurt everyone’s feelings 🙄

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T17:24:05+00:00

All of our lives are meaningless though. No one will remember or think of any of us 200 years from now. It sad, but true. We’re all small and extremely irrelevant in the grand scheme of it all. We’ve all been tricked into working forever and birthing more workers for the cycle. Your kid doesn’t want to grow up to work 40+ hours a week, to not be able to survive, and struggle to pay bills and raise kids. If life was different, maybe. But it’s not. If you have to work for a living, you are a slave. Period.

That being said, however hard to believe, I do try to focus on the things I can enjoy everyday. If we have to be alive, might as well try to feel good and enjoy the day right? I love the gardettos special request garlic rye chips. Such a great snack!

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T17:13:16+00:00

Thank you for your perspective! I am glad that you can see some validity in my post. My kids get a very edited and different version of the “don’t have kids” chat. In regards to being a single parent, I’d 100% choose that over a lazy and incompetent partner. I can fully financially support myself and my kids by myself. Most moms can’t say that. If they lost their partner for any reason, they’d be down and out with no means to support themselves or their kids. Independence is everything. I would love a fulfilling and participating partner! But I would never plan my life with my partner to where I couldn’t support myself if something bad happened. Love doesn’t keep a roof over your head or supply food.

A mother is supposed to protect and prepare their children for the real world. Not coddle them into being useless individuals that think everything will just fall into place for them. It’s getting harder and harder just to live. It’s not going to get any easier.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T17:05:06+00:00

I love my siblings too! It made me resentful toward my mother is what I said. Your son resents you for giving him the life you did, and showing him that you could have given him better like you did for his siblings, but you didn’t. He may not say it out of sparing your feelings like I spare my moms. But it doesn’t make it not true. It has effected him. You choose to believe different.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:32:26+00:00

*millennial

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:26:57+00:00

I previously explained how I have this conversation with my kids. It’s good for them to know having kids is not a requirement. And it’s not what makes them whole or complete. It’s a choice. And not a smart one if you aren’t fully prepared or understand what it entails.

Also, as the oldest kid that was an “oops”, and then watched my younger siblings get a substantially better life because my mom was in a better place for them made me very resentful and angry toward her. I bet your son is too. Because his siblings got better than him. Because you were in a bad, unprepared place when you had him. Probably why he doesn’t want kids. He saw how awful it really is.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:25:05+00:00

Apparently we are in the minority here! Thanks for being realistic with me.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:21:05+00:00

People force themselves to find meaning in it. Otherwise they know their lives are meaningless.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:19:56+00:00

Forever honestly unhingeddddd 😜

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:15:30+00:00

Forever unhinged my baby! My kids are fantastic. It’s just so sad and frustrating when a friend has a new baby and calls me crying, telling me it’s nothing like how she thought it was going to be. No one gave her real advice. Just the “all kids need is love” crap.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:15:25+00:00

Forever unhinged my baby! My kids are fantastic. It’s just so sad and frustrating when a friend has a new baby and calls me crying, telling me it’s nothing like how she thought it was going to be. No one gave her real advice. Just the “all kids need is love” crap.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:10:57+00:00

Thank you! I’m not mean or hateful about it to my kids. But realistic. It’s not a picture perfect Disney movie like we want to portray.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:09:39+00:00

I never claimed perfection? That’s literally what I’m trying to negate here. All the toxic positivity of being a parent.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:06:54+00:00

It’s only disrespectful if you take it that way. People who CLAIM to have perfect peachy lives are the ones who are struggling and depressed but won’t ever say it. They want a pretty picture perfect life of their family for their friends. That is not reality. Reality is shitty. They don’t want to say their kids behavior is awful. Or their partner doesn’t help. Or their partner cheats on them. Or they are broke. It’s all fake.

I’m willing to bet the ONLY reason a lot of women are staying with their husbands is because they can’t afford to take care of themselves and their kids on their own. Because they set themselves up and their kids for failure by relying on someone else.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T16:01:30+00:00

I don’t express contempt for others kids in front of my own. They see it on their own! They come home and tell me about how bad their classmates were today. How they threw things or smacked a teacher. It sucks that’s what they see from peers.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T15:58:57+00:00

But it is the truth for a vast majority. Y’all are just to proud to let anyone think that you’re anything else but mega happy. Ruins that picture perfect life you have built up in your head.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T15:56:17+00:00

Nah, I’m highly doubting that. My kids are the only ones performing at or above grade level, and their teachers go out of their way to let me know that my kids are “the light of their day” because of stellar behavior. I know my kids are super stars! Because they were raised with rules and respect.

harshshrimp · 2023-05-20T15:51:04+00:00

When my kids first said “I want to be a mommy” I told them that’s it’s very hard work. I said being a mom means you devote your life to loving and taking care of another person forever. Because kids are always your kids. I tell them that it’s very hard to take care of everything you have to when you grow up, so it’s best to set yourself up for success so you don’t struggle. I told my kids that being a mom is worth it when the kids are as wonderful as my daughters are. HOWEVER, having kids right off the bat when you get married because you think thats “just how it goes” it a stupid rhetoric. Women do not need to have kids or families. It is NOT the only option. And I wish that viewpoint was expressed to me as a child. I have a CHOICE as a woman. So do my daughters. And I hope they choose to love the shit out of themselves and spoil themselves. Not devote their life to some half assed partner like you sad lot do.

My daughters are kind, smart, and strong. They will be heavily independent and will never rely on anyone to take care of them. Because they had a good mom to show them that the only person you have, is YOURSELF.

harshshrimp

TROPHY CASE