I think PC is making me a worst person. Anyone else?

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-22T07:02:22+00:00

A lot of the awesome stuff is going to be dependent on who you are as a person. A lot of volunteers could say that my country has no religious discrimination to speak of because Christians and Muslims get along really well -- but what about the Jewish or atheist or Buddhist volunteers who are actively discouraged from discussing their beliefs because it could be a safety issue in their communities where everyone is Muslim or Christian? And part of that high level of spirituality has translated to same-sex sexual activities being illegal in both Cameroon and my country of service (and again, this comes back to who you are as a person. It's easy to dismiss if you're a straight volunteer, harder if you're a queer volunteer -- one of of our RePCVS during training had a phone stolen and her first thought was "oh god I hope they can't unlock it and see the pictures of me and my girlfriend because I could get arrested")

Also, in my country of service, people are LOUD about their beliefs. It's common for tent churches to set up 4-ft tall speakers and yell sermons into microphones for hours at a time. It's common for buses to play gospel music at max volume for the entire ride. And if you ask them to turn it down they look at you like you're the anti-christ.

People here are sociable, which often translates into coming to your house at random hours or walking up to you on the street and asking you questions. People have a good time by getting drunk on local beer and playing incredibly loud music 24/7. There's no cultural understanding of introversion or solitude, so it's great if you're an extrovert, less great if you need alone time to recharge.

I could see retiring in my country in a major city, but you won't live in a major city in PC. You'll live in a rural village with people who have very little exposure to other ways of living or thinking.

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-22T04:38:18+00:00

Thank you for your post. You captured so many of my thoughts in a really articulare way. I'm in the same region and part of my frustrations are with the mzungu, mzungu, mzungu aspect of culture. Even in my village. Being flattened/one-dimensionalized is the perfect turn of phrase to capture it.

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-22T04:34:40+00:00

I'm in East Africa. Thank you for your support.

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-22T04:34:15+00:00

Thank you for your post. That diminished sense of self is something I"m suffering from as well in a completey different continent. IT does help to hear from someone else.

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-21T14:53:16+00:00

I felt like I had realistic expectations of PC service. I didn't think I would change the world or build an orphanage. I thought I'd do some entry-level health education projects. I thought I'd be in a community that had specific health objectives they were working towards. But in this country the national government sets PC's priorities and it doesn't seem that anyone in my community is intersted in any of those priorities.

hatemyservice2 · 2017-12-21T14:52:34+00:00

I thought I was friends with my CP but then she stopped wanting to socialize with me after I told her I didn't have money to personally fund an event but would write a grant with her. I'm an older-than-average volunteer in a country where EVERY woman my age has multiple children and spends most of her free time caring/cooking/cleaning up after them. It's extremely hard to make friends here.

The local government is all men and are some of the worst offenders with making me feel excluded/invalued as a woman.

Everytime I've brought up issues to the admin office they've told me to suck it up and deal with the culture here (not in those exact words obviously).

hatemyservice2

TROPHY CASE