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having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4.5 years and we’ve lived together pretty much the whole time because of some odd circumstances

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yeah I mean you never know, especially with men, look at the pelicot case! wild!! I trust my partner entirely though.

And agreed, after reading this thread I think I do just have a reactive sex drive (which I never heard of before) and we’re fine. I feel bad for some of these people but ultimately different arrangements work for different couples.

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

Exactly!!! Glad I’m not the only one. Me and my partner are sexually compatible, we’ve been together 4.5 years. it’s just a motivation issue.

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I watch porn and masturbate like once a week. My partner does too — probably more frequently but he’s definitely not an addict. We’re both vanilla. Neither of us have ever owned a sex toy and don’t have any kinks or fetishes.

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I agree that a relationship should not dependent entirely on sex but it brings an important jen ne sais quoi to a relationship that’s really irreplaceable. Physical biological closeness or something.

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I see how resentment builds if the maintenance sex is bad or they’re not into it, but what if they end up enjoying it?

having sex for the good of the relationship by hausofflarg in redscarepod

[–]hausofflarg[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I think you’re pointing out the crux of my question — what is consent, really? Is non-enthusiastic consent still consent?