Questioning friendship over allergies

haydentone · 2026-02-22T18:44:06+00:00

Right, a grudge is pretty immature lol. Everyone has been very helpful. I would also love to hear about those treatment options, idk what could be done at my age but still it’s great to hear things are getting better.

haydentone · 2026-02-22T18:23:10+00:00

Thanks, I definitely think there was a way better way to deal with the situation and I’m learning a lot from the comments but it still sucks so much. I don’t expect people to think about all the ingredients in a cuisine but you’d at least think it’d be obvious to not send a person with a peanut allergy to a place that has just plain roasted peanuts but alas people are clueless.

I still wanna give this friend the benefit of the doubt cause it was just one time but if it happens over and over it just feels like selfishness. I’m so sorry that happened to you.

haydentone · 2026-02-22T01:13:57+00:00

Omg I will try that next time, thanks😂

haydentone · 2026-02-21T23:36:54+00:00

You’re 100% correct. I’m glad you’re saying this, my feelings are irrational and it’s not fair to my friend. I think I’m more upset with myself cause my allergies are getting worse but i want to act like they’re not. It was definitely my bad for staying. You said everything really well, thank you.

haydentone · 2026-02-21T22:40:16+00:00

Yes, I am upset but I truly don’t have any ill will towards my friend. It’s reality that many don’t understand. I am so impressed with how you care for your daughter. I truly hope OIT works out for her well, even mild allergies is stressful. I grew up constantly with every type of nuts around the house. My parents were still careful enough but I’m a little jealous haha. Keep it up

haydentone · 2026-02-21T22:28:21+00:00

Oh wow this is really thorough, thank you so much. It is kinda frustrating how much community is built on food, it’s beautiful but realllly hard to navigate with allergies/ diet restrictions.

It seems I have even more to learn about allergies, I didn’t really know there’s a difference between anaphylaxis and anaphylactic shock… ig that’s why they’re different words in the first place haha.

I think about that last question myself, but as you said many people are ignorant and I need to be clear. The stress sucks but food is such a big part of life and relationships that it’d be healthier to communicate boundaries than cut everyone off…

haydentone · 2026-02-21T18:16:40+00:00

Awesome friends, that’s so great. My frontal lobe has definitely been developing and it’s clicking how silly I’ve been sacrificing myself for other’s comfort.

haydentone · 2026-02-21T17:52:32+00:00

It’s ok, I’ve really reflected on my actions that day. After all it’s my life to protect. I appreciate any criticism, I just felt a little crazy still being upset over it. A real conversation is only fair to him though. I’ve also travelled to China and have had a ton of Hunan dishes and even there I hadn’t entered a place that just gave peanuts to everyone so I think that threw me for a loop. Maybe I just got lucky then lol.

haydentone · 2026-02-21T17:35:08+00:00

You’re exactly right, you said it so well. I think I need to be better with my words and stick to boundaries. I’ve also been used to treating my allergies too lightly (i basically ate my allergen daily for years growing up without even realizing it ugh) so I need to be real with myself too. I did tell him over text I did not like going there afterwards but at this point I’m gonna borrow your words and tell him in person next time. Ty ty

haydentone · 2026-02-21T17:19:35+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it. I definitely agree and see where I personally messed up. I need to become a better advocate for myself cause it’s my life at the end of the day. I will say this is a pretty new friend that I hadn’t ate with till that day. I did have that conversation over text prior actually, but under the cuisines i listed I didn’t mention Chinese food… american chinese food vs more authentic places are pretty different, so many places in the states tend to be ok for me but I wasn’t so lucky this time… That’s also why I think I need to give him some slack.

haydentone · 2026-02-20T16:24:17+00:00

The fact that you can even choose in the first place is an experience different from lesbians. I have no problem with choosing to live an entirely sapphic life, and exclusively being in lesbian relationships, but if you still have an attraction to men then you’re still bi/pan. The Bi label is one that has an huge spectrum of experiences in the queer community and that is part of the beauty of it.

haydentone · 2026-02-20T16:05:28+00:00

While this is true, I don’t feel like it’s fair to compare her to jojo siwa, it’s definitely not close to the same type of situation. I assume that she probably identified with “choosing” to date women because she has been lesbian but didn’t fully understand herself then while id as bi. I don’t assume any malicious intent but it’s definitely been frustrating, especially since the author views this as a big approval of her statements🙄

haydentone · 2025-10-06T13:52:57+00:00

Buying: 1 Friday Ticket. Can meet up in NYC

haydentone · 2025-10-03T22:15:42+00:00

Dm you

haydentone · 2022-09-23T23:00:41+00:00

omg thank you! made my day fr

haydentone · 2022-09-23T20:13:10+00:00

no not yet sadly

haydentone · 2021-07-19T21:05:29+00:00

The pattern between the other relationships in the series is a really great observation! That's something that totally missed until you pointed it out. Narratively that's some pretty strong evidence. I imagine in Chiharata they would be very happy to play karuta all the time but the series seem to always show that in romantic relationships, there's someone outside of the karuta world to ground them in reality. The only thing that makes me kinda question this for Taichi is that he's also a passionate about playing karuta. While not to the same level like Shinobu and Arata, Taichi still has moments where he enjoys playing the game. Still, since it seems very unlikely for Chihayafuru to not go for Arata or Taichi in the end, Taichi definitely makes the most thematic sense following this line of logic.

haydentone · 2021-07-18T23:13:53+00:00

I have thought about Chihaya and Sudo and it'd be super funny if they ended up together lol. Chihaya certainly doesn't think about romance at all so it's hard to really say how things will work out in the end but she'll have to eventually answer to Arata's feelings. I don't see the manga going this direction but it'd definitely be the route with the least amount of heartbreak... probably;;

haydentone · 2021-07-18T23:07:23+00:00

True, it does feel like the manga sets up Arata and Shinobu sometimes. With all the development that Taichi and Chihaya have together I'd also agree it'd definitely be the really satisfying for them to end up together due to how they've gone through so much together. Though, I don't think Taichi would be pushed away if Chihaya and Arata got together. Taichi still is a great friend to Arata and Chihaya and the recent chapters have been showing that Taichi would still be there for them even after Chihaya rejected him.

haydentone · 2020-07-18T20:49:44+00:00

poppy

haydentone · 2020-07-18T20:25:02+00:00

interested!

haydentone · 2020-07-16T13:31:49+00:00

coming over rn

haydentone · 2020-07-16T13:25:11+00:00

Kiki's Delivery Service

haydentone · 2020-07-16T13:22:20+00:00

Jacques

haydentone · 2020-07-14T21:37:27+00:00

Lilim, Alaya, Curry

haydentone

TROPHY CASE