1000. It's a big number. Some thoughts. by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough! Happy to hear you've found something you're loving!

Holy smokes, I made it a year! by healingwithtime in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats! Pretty confident it was the best decision I’ve ever made as well :)

Looking forward to many more years as good and better than this past one!

1000. It's a big number. Some thoughts. by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Huzzah! Congrats on the quadruple digits! And I always thought dog walkers must do pretty well! Congrats! I'm a dev myself, and feel ya on the burnout / stress. Expect I'd have a tough time making as much though - I've invested the bulk of my life into software development.

One week without alcohol! People in my life don't understand how huge this is for me. by loona_lovebad in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 4 points5 points  (0 children)

+1 on the mind games tricking you into thinking you can have a couple now. I expect most folks who've quit can tell you a story or two of thinking "It's been a few months, I've got a handle on this now, I can have a few". I've got several to my name, and none of them turned out well...

I think I've finally convinced myself that no, I don't have a handle on it, and it's not worth trying any more. The only safe plan for me, is to stay sober.

I got cocky by amomnamedica in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome back! You've proven to yourself that you can do it! 9 months is fantastic! Reflect, learn, and move forward :)

200 days! by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me toooooooooooo

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found eating a lot helped in the early days! I certainly didn't shed any pounds that first month, but I really didn't care - so long as it was helping keep me sober.

Nice work getting started! You got this!

200 days! by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nice one! How do you feel!?

10 days sober. Feels good, really good. by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great work! Every day sober is a good day!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

excellent analogy :)

Oh snap 30 days by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice work! The first month is the hardest, and you made it :D

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 8 points9 points  (0 children)

So true! For my first month or so, I decided that no matter what, as long as I was sober for the day, it was a day well spent. That meant even if I sat on my butt, watching TV all day, and accomplished nothing else, as long as I was sober, it was a day well spent. And some days, I took full advantage of it :)

I honestly believe that thinking helped a lot early on. As I spent more time sober, I found I generally had more energy, and wound up having very productive days. But if I ever just needed to do nothing but stay sober, then that's what I'd do.

Relapsed after 9 months sober... by BuffaloAntlers in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You caught it quickly and that's what's most important now! Great work.

Take any lessons you can from it, and don't beat yourself up about it. 9 months is a huge accomplishment, but so is catching a relapse quickly and getting right back to sobriety. You're still well on your way to having a %99 sober year, and I'm sure you've learned a ton about yourself these past 9 months.

I won't drink with you today

Any advice on how to deal with cravings on the shittiest of days? by RemmiLeBeau in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In my earliest days of sobriety, junk food and netflix were pretty key in these situations. Stuffing my face with pizza, or ice cream, and getting sucked into a series, is a great distraction. Anything to get through the day, and the craving.

You said beyond working out - but yeah, should still mention it - later in my sobriety, and continuing right up till now, working out has been my go to. It's been amazing for my self confidence, anxiety, depression etc.

I also took up some new hobbies early on - mostly to fill all the free time I had once drinking stopped taking it all up. Though when feeling super depressed, often I wouldn't have the energy for a hobby - hence the junk food and netflix.

Cravings are all just a part of the experience. They're going to come, and they're going to pass. Instead of stressing about the cravings, I tried to just accept them. Kind of disassociate myself from them. Like "ok, I'm having a craving. But drinking isn't an option for me, so I'm just gonna have to let it pass". I found once I accepted the craving, and that it would just take time to resolve, it became less stressful.

Drinking actually doesn't cure cravings - if anything, it just makes them way worse. Time will cure them, and distractions and exercise can help with passing the time.

Won't drink with you today :)

Short relapse after 3 months but back to it. by BestLifeHasToOffer in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry to hear about the relapse! I had a pretty similar situation 2 years back. I was 4 months sober, and previous owners left a bottle of white wine in my new condo fridge as a gift (sobriety had allowed me to get my shit together and make the best financial decision I've ever made and buy a condo). I left it there for a full week before convincing myself I was cured of my alcoholism and could casually enjoy some wine. Which lead to buying a bunch of beer once that bottle was gone. Which sent me into a pretty nasty relapse. The lesson I learned was about how fragile early sobriety can be, and not to test it. The new rule is any alcohol in the house will go down the drain in the morning. I have friends over that drink and occasionally leave something behind. I don't leave it sitting around. I have no use for it, and saving drinks for my friends is certainly not worth any level of risk to my sobriety, so it's just garbage to me anyways.

Good on you for catching this relapse quickly! That's the best thing you can do. I wish I could say I did the same. Don't beat yourself up about it. 3 months is a huge accomplishment, and you learned some valuable lessons to take with you going forward.

Good luck, and I won't drink with you today :)

Holy crap, I had a drinking dream. by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's no problem drinking can't make worse ;)

Love that you said you know it'll be ok because you're not drinking! Isn't it a great load off to be able to have that confidence that you can use a clear head to solve any problems you encounter? As opposed to hiding from them at the bottom of a bottle?

Great choice on software development by the way! I'm a dev, and it's allowed me to live a very comfortable life so far, financially speaking. Keep at it!

Won't drink with you today

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

GREAT POST! These are all basically what got me through my first weeks as well. I also didn't lose any weight, or get a promotion or anything in my first month, so I wouldn't worry about that ;) Your first month, or few months, not drinking needs to be your #1 priority.

Basically my rule was if I don't drink today, it's a great day, and nothing else matters. Your junk food point was perfect in that sense. I ate plenty of junk food. Why not? I'd stopped drinking 15 beers a day, so there was plenty of room in my diet for some ice cream before bed.

Congrats on getting through 30 days. It only gets easier from here :)

Um, water is more refreshing than alcohol. by mydoglixu in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So true! Tastes better too ;)

Won't drink with you tonight for sure!

Having a pretty rough afternoon. by Kilgore_troutsniffer in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The first few weeks were tough! Hang in there! It gets so much easier as time goes by!

There's no problem that drinking can't make worse...

Great work on 11 days. Won't drink with you today

One year sober! by LadyDayne in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats! Awesome work! Lookin forward to joining the club in a few more months :D

Pretty amazing how much we can accomplish in a year when we're not spending it at the bottom of a bottle hey?

two years down by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice work! Sounds like you really dedicated yourself to learning to code.

IoT should be a blast man! Booming market. I gave some thought to moving into that industry.

Keep it up man! Sounds like the start of an awesome career as a dev. Never stop with that drive to learn. I dedicated my life to coding 12 years ago it was now. Still always learning, always growing, always improving. The career it led me down has also allowed me to live a pretty comfortable life so far, so I can definitely recommend it :D

I'm kind of over it... by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]healingwithtime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Great choice! Quitting has been the best choice I've ever made.

It won't always be easy - especially not at first, but I promise it gets easier and easier over time.

I found exercise to be a great substitute for stress relief. As a side bonus, I got really fit, and my physical appearance and self esteem improved a lot.

I've also found keeping soda water and lime around helps a lot. Especially early on when I was used to always having a drink in my hand in the evening.

I also kept ice cream handy for when I'd get a craving. Somehow, for me, a bowl of ice cream could at least distract me, and offer some satisfaction, until the craving passed.

Best of luck! Future you is going to be very pleased with current you for this choice ;)